How do I say NO?

Question

I just recieved a call from a good friend of mine. She needs a sitter from 2:15 p.m. until 10:15 p.m. every day except Thursdays and Fridays. She has 5 kids, ages 5,4, 2 (twins) and a newborn. She is willing to pay me $150 a month. Now I know that isn't crap for pay.. here is the real problem. I am 30 weeks pregnant with my 4th baby. I have a history of preterm labor and preeclampsia and am supposed to be "taking it easy" so I don't have too many more problems. I know I have to say no... but how? I don't want to hurt their feelings.. I just can't do it. What would you do? How would you say no? Any advice?? Thanks

Her 5 kids plus my 3... that is 8! Not to mention the one on the way! That is too many kids! I am only one person.

Answer 1

Just say NO ...you can't handle it. She is very darned selfish if you ask me. Since this is your friend, I'm sure she knows your history and knows you are supposed to be taking it easy ...how could she even have the nerve; better yet the audacity to ask you this?! Wow, not to mention the crappy pay, she is really trying to take you for a ride, tell her this bus is not in service. I can't believe how self-centered some people can be. Tell her to find a 24 hour sitter - I know you don't want to hurt your friend, but she is and would be hurting you a lot more if you went through with this.

Good Luck!

Answer 2

Good grief, $150 per month for five kids IS crap for pay. That's about $1.20 an hour, do you realize that? And that's only if you're doing it Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. I'm not sure from your question if this included weekends or not. You could get easier work for six times the pay at MCDONALD'S.

Do NOT do it. I know you probably aren't doing it for the money, but please, think of your own health. Explain to your friend exactly what you've explained to us, that your health and you baby must come first, and that $150 wouldn't cut it anyway. If she's really a good friend she'll understand.

I charge $7 to babysit for the first kid, $8 if the family can afford it or if the kid has a reputation for being rambunctious, and 50 cents per additional kid. That way I get paid for how hard I work, and she gets good, quality service.

Answer 3

Holy crap! $150 a MONTH! That should be PER WEEK PER CHILD! If she can't afford to pay for child care or be a stay at home mom...she should stop popping them out! Like a damn slot machine! Ching Ching Ching Ching Ching...
5 kids under age 6....good lord!
I know that you don't want to hurt her feelings...you must be a very good person/friend! Just tell her that you are supposed to be taking it easy and that your doctor said that you are not in a position to be taking on such a huge physical responsibility.
You obviously feel bad and want to help her out....but you didn't impregnate her repeatedly and your first responsibilty and priority should be to your family and the health of yourself and your unborn child!
I am sorry to sound mean....but if she got herself into this situation and she is going to have to figure it out on her own. Honestly, if she is a good friend, she shouldn't expect you to take care of all of her kids and your own while you are pregnant! Besides, what would you do 10 weeks from now....take care of all of her kids and miss out on bonding with your own newborn?
Good luck to you and Congratulations on your pregnancy! :)

Answer 4

Tell her be for real I am 30 weeks pregnant how do you expect me to run after 5 kids and to be honest what is 150 dollars a month I have 3 kids of my own this is a house not a jungle gym.

Answer 5

First of all, she is ripping you off. I was paid by my own cousin to watch his one year old son for $250 per week. I only had to watch one and it was hard work and your friend wants you to watch five at one time for only $150 a month?
Also, your health is more important. Trust me. I was exhausted after running around one child. You on the other hand are pregnant and you will get tired more easily especially at those ages her children are. Just politely tell her that you can't at this moment in your life. I'm sure that are plenty of people she could find to watch her kids.
Think about your baby and how tired you would feel all the time. Be brave. Use your maternal instincts to protect your child in this situation.

Answer 6

$150/mo for 40hrs a week babysitting 5 kids?! You think that's good pay?? I pay my babysitter $5/hr for my 5 children and I thought THAT was good! LOL
But for real. Be honest. Say, "I would love to help you out, however, my pregnancies are high risk and that would just be too much for me. I'm sorry I can't help you out." Then offer some other suggestions, teenagers, post an ad, etc.

Answer 7

Tell her you would love to, but that your doctor has said that you need to take it easy for the baby's sake. That way you can make the doctor the bad guy.

Also, $150 a month for a 40 hour a week job? That boils down to less than a dollar an hour....I doubt she can find ANYONE to watch 5 kids for less than $1 an hour.

Answer 8

Just explain it to her. Tell her you dont think it would be a good idea with your history of preterm labor and your 30 weeks pregnant now.

Answer 9

Tell her " I sympathize with your situation, however I am in the same place as you are. I would have to find a sitter for my own kids to be with your kids. And with my past health issues, I can't see to extend myself further. I'm sorry." Then offer her any names of some good sitters in the area, or daycare facilities.

Good luck.

Answer 10

Tell her what you just told us. The doctor told me to take it easy and God forbid, what would happen if something went wrong with you while you were watching the babies? Then what? What if you went into labor while watching 5 babies for her. I don't think it's a safe situation for you or for her children. Put it to her like that, i'm sure it would make her think. That's not being rude, just tell her you're thinking of your safety as well as the children.