nervous about first time?

Question

I am 20 and a virgin obviously. I am so nervous about the first time. I am very uncomfortable with my body. This is embarassing but I have long labia and I feel like the guy is just gonna be grossed out. This is a big reason why I have not had sex. Also I fear getting pregnant. Also how painful will it be?

Answer 1

thats normal guys usually like them longer and u should kind of finger youre self or use some thing so u can kind of c what it fells like hope i helped and p.s. if u dont do ne thing the pain is not that bad

Answer 2

OK first, honey, get yourself some books on female sexuality, look online if you don't want to go to a store. There are lots of good ones, with pics, so you can compare and see that we are all different but also a lot the same. Frankly, most chics have more labia than not, unlike me, so i felt like guys would be grossed out...which they haven't been, cuz they luv my other bits...
Get on birth control!!!
Go to your doctor's, or a planned parenthood kinda place, find out all your options (the pill worked for me, and made my periods super short, you can get a pill that you get your period only 4 times a year! yay!)
Now, if it will hurt, or not, depends on if your hymen is intact. If you've done a lot of horse riding, for instance, it may not be there...mmm...maybe that's why it didn't hurt for me (i was 23)...
At any rate, when you do get to it, make sure you are hot and ready to go! Spend all the time you need on foreplay (kissing, necking, breast play, finger ******* etc) Maybe have some lube handy (good ol' KY will do) just in case, might not be as wet as u could be, if you are too nervous...and from what i hear, the pain is just from insertion, then it might get better, if he takes it slow...frankly, i'd get a nice dildo, and do it myself, if i were u, then it for sure won't hurt with the real thing!!

GOOD LUCK!

don't worry, just get educated, get birth control, get supplies....it'll be great!

Answer 3

First of all, women's vagina's are similar in that we share the same features (ex. clitoris). However, we all look "different" down there. Men really don't care as long as you keep it clean and you don't have std's! As a teenager, I used to believe that I had a ugly vagina, but after looking at porn, I realized that my vagina was quite normal.
Pregnancy is no joke. Consider getting birth control pills AND using a condom as well. I assure you that will take away your fears of getting pregnant. Also, the condom will protect you against std's and AID's.
The pain factor. Every girl will experience something different. For me, it was extremely painful. I recommend foreplay before you have sex! This will help you loosen up your fears about sex and being uncomfortable with your body. It will also get your juices flowing so the actual act won't be as nearly as painful.
Finally, are you sure that you want to have sex? I thought I was ready and I wish now that I would have waited for marriage. Sex is wonderful, but it's no fun just to bump and grind with somebody. If you are going to go through then have fun. Don't worry about your body. Look at yourself naked in the mirror and tell yourself that you are beautiful.

Answer 4

It's a bit painful at first and especially if you're dry. Don't be the one on top (yet) and expect a little bleeding. Don't worry so much about how you look - I'm sure you are much more harder on yourself than you should be and really, it's not like you'll be completely exposing yourself like you're going for a PAPS test!

Make sure the atmosphere is comfortable (and you're comfortable with the man - if he knows you're a virgin I'm sure he'll be a bit easier on you) and go on the pill or have some sort of contraception for yourself and make the man wear a condom - don't forget about STD's!!!

By the way - congrats on holding out so long...seems like people give it away like gum anymore and at too young of an age!

Answer 5

well if your a virgin, your obviously holding out for something a lil more special that the usual got drunk at a teenie party and had sex...so you probably going to have sex with someone with whom you have somekind of intimacy going with...about the labia...come on girl...your going to be giving a guy some hot sex, unless those labia are stretched out below knee level...i just dont think a guy is gonna give much of a crap...besides, all vaginas are interesting in their own way...

best of luck!

Answer 6

Me and my husband did not have sex until 17 days after we got married since I was a virgin. It takes time and patience. I found a position where we sit indian style face to face with me in his lap and my legs wrapped around and that worked the best for my first time another good starter position for me is on my side and him sitting up. We usually have to start this way everytime. If your worried about him seeing your vagina, unless he is shallow than he won't care what it looks like. Vaginas come in many packages. If you are that worried try a position where you lie on your tummy and he gets on top. It won't be able to go as far in and the only thing he will see is your bottom

Answer 7

You are totally normal. Your body is normal. Like men who have short penis and long penis, fat penis, skinny penis, women have variations in their vagina area, but not much. Some labia are short, and some are longer, some are large and some are small, but all are normal variances.
Men do not care and are just thrilled to be there.
Since you are nervous about engaging in sex with a man, I suggest you start practicing with a bit of ky jelly and a vibrator before you engage in intercourse with a man, just to see how if feels and get used to the feel

Answer 8

first off dont be so hard on yourself. i'm sure youre not going to gross anybody out. also, if youre worried about pregnancy, make sure you use a condom or birth control. have you ever used a vibrator or a dildo? that will give a good idea of what its going to feel like. as long as he is gentle and starts slowly it wont hurt that bad. communication is the key, let him know what feels good and what doesnt. most guys are very responsive to what a girl wants as long as you communicate it to him. foreplay is very important also because stimulation will relax your muslces and naturally lubricate your sex organs. remember use protection and relax! if you really love him it should be a wonderful experience.

Answer 9

First off everyones body is different so yours is just fine. Also you need to get comfortable with your own body first before you even consider sex. Explore your own body and learn what feels good and what makes you orgasm etc. Save your first time for someone you love and are willing to spend the rest of your life with. Also if you are not willing to deal with a possible unexpected pregnancy then don't even think of having sex as no birth control is 100% effective. It will not be painful if you are relaxed and ready for it.

Answer 10

i lost my virginity young, many people thinks its stupid but if its with some one you love and its what you both want its fine, I'm still with my guy and its great but sex was shall we say slightly strange at first. i experienced no pain at all, but you need to stretch your vagina first, for about the first 4 months of having sex i had to help him get inside as i was not big enough. you need to think about protection, i recommend the birth control pill and condoms, if you use a lubricated condom it will ease him inside, there is no need to be embarrassed about you body, he might not even look down there, for me he doesn't look down there, and if he;s on top you can't actually see you, just his penis. you need to experiment, and make sure your comfortable with the guy, if your not then don't do it, just make sure your safe and it shouldnt hurt if you experiment first.

Answer 11

No, it won't hurt too much. You can go on the pill now, so you won't fall pregnant.
As for your other problem - well, I've never come across a man who has been grossed out by any woman's body! But I am sorry that you're allowing this to control your lovelife.