I hate making decisions...?

Question

... and I feel like I am on the cusp of making one of the biggest in my life regarding my career and location. I've tried weighing up the advantages and disadvantages on both sides but it's not helping. Anyone have any advice on how to make calm and calculated decisions?

Answer 1

I'm sort of approaching the point where I'm going to have to do something similar, so I empathise! But I have been through a similar situation before, and some things that I think help are:
- Good old fashioned written pros and cons list, but give each point a weighting as to how important it is (so something that's very important counts 5 points, whereas something that's only a mild advantage/ inconvenience is 1 point) Don't us ethis as a sole basis for decision making, but it does help to get thing down on paper where you can see them. Get someone you trust to read through your list and discuss it with you.
- Find people who've already experienced whatever it is you're deciding to do (or something similar). So if you're considering going to work abroad, it helps to chat to someone who's already worked abroad about how they found the experience and how it's helped them/ what wasn't so good. If you don't know anyone, find a chatroom or forum via google or a careers website. You don't need to become lifelong friends- just have an informal chat.
-Consider where you would like to be in five, ten or twenty years (think family, finance, and lifestyle as well as career) - how will taking either decision impact on this. Whish decision is likely to lead to the closest match to your desires? Try and trace through the steps. We can't predict everything, but we can make educated guesses.
- Find out as much as you can about both sides of the coin. Make sure you know absolutely every detail and fact you possibly can. Sometimes nerves about a decision are because we fear taking a step into the dark- the more you know, the lighter things will look.
-Talk it over with friends, family, even a counsellor - they can't and won't make the decision for you, but they may point out things that hadn't occured to you that will help you decide. Also, just vocalising things helps sometimes.
- Don't agonise over it night and day - remember to relax and take time out. When I made my last big decision I found I finally resolved the issue after having a day just watching DVDs relaxing and not thinking about it. Sometimes too much thinking means you can't see the wood for the trees.
- Accept that you eventually have to go one way or the other. And when you do, don't look back - embrace your decision and the way you have chosen, don't worry about the road not taken!
Good luck!

Answer 2

When in turmoil a major decision should be put on hold. Eventually you will be calm and will be able to make a decision.

HOWEVER,

If you know deep down what you really want to do but are feeling fear - then do it afraid. All of us have done things afraid - we call it nervousness but it is fear. Think of how many times you have done this and remember that things turned out just fine 99.5% of the time.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Make a decision and live with that decision for a day or two to see how you feel. Then change your decision to an alternative and live with that for a day or two.

Or you could ask your question on Answers to get others point of view. Others might think of something good or bad that you haven't.

Answer 4

Maybe its just fear thats holding you back if the weighing up didn't give you a straight answer.

If both sides balance up then just pick from a hat and make the best go of it that you can.

sometimes, people spend too long thinking and not doing.

by the way its only the biggest of your life so far - they may be more ahead, so hurry up and get moving!

Answer 5

OH dude,i always have that 'nemesis' too....1st,try some alternative that relieve u...put ur mind into a certain calm state,maybe sleeping,nap,meditation,etc...
then,try to think forward,and backward so u could understand it better....if you cant do it,just ignore it,,,there is always solution but you dont have to take the risk to discover it everytime...
if the problem is nt urs,just put it aside

Answer 6

I know how is hard to make a decision but sometimes you must make a decision.I have the same problem it is very hard but it is the part of your daily work

Answer 7

Dont be afraid of making a wrong decision, its part of your evolution process.

The more decisions you make, the easier it will get.

Answer 8

Flip a coin! Heads you decide and tails you don't
If it comes up heads then flip it again for each choice.

No wait!..... best two out of three!

Answer 9

Prayer is one of the best ways to get the answers you need. God listens,and He's all knowing, and all powerful. Please give it a chance. Take care, and best wishes.

Answer 10

The best thing you can do is go with your gut feeling, your first instinct.