to be getting married and trying to take my son away to another location far away..how do I go into court with the focus to deny her the move..when I know waht she wants..how to not let the emotions get in the way of something that will be very painful when I have lost in court in the past becasue of my feelings for her...when she ran over me with lies, bogus allegations..fabrications..to cover her own tracks...and then blames me for everything.How do I look beyond the emotional side of me?we spent 12 years together with a semi0great realtionship on an international basis and had years of adventures and fun we were truly a couple..linked in life..but things went astray..disappoinments...and she got very unhpapy..I was too busy to see waht was happening to her..and she cannot express herself very well emotionally without blowing up.. and freaking out..some say she is bi-polar.I believe there is truth to this.. I have noticed two sides to her.one very sweet and wonderful the other scarey
2007-03-14 02:58:41 · 8 answers · asked by RealEYES 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you are divorced there is nothing to can do to prevent her from moving herself. However, your son is another matter.
You need a lawyer familiar with your juristiction and custody arrangement. Fast.
2007-03-14 03:02:29 · answer #1 · answered by Disco Stu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said you were "too busy" to see what was happening in your marriage...
it takes TWO to tango, and it's not just her fault the marriage broke up. if you neglected her, she is likely upset over it, and it might take her some time to let it go.
meanwhile, when people get divorced, there is usually some sort of statement in the custody agreement which says the child can't be moved from the state without both parents agreeing. You will have to talk to an attorney and check into it.
you seem distressed, upset and your thinking is all about your pain and agony -- you don't seem that upset about anything but YOU. You have a child involved, too.
have you considered therapy? perhaps this might be a way to learn to cope with your feelings and settle down. when you are thinking clearly, things seem to go more smoothly in life.
you are divorced, so if your wife is bipolar, you have no say in the matter...who cares? it's not something you need to be concerned about now... she's your EX.
and if i were neglected in a marriage, i would be upset and "emotional" too. literally everyone on the planet has a "good" side and a "bad" side...
i think it would do you good to set aside all of the emotional "stuff" and start thinking more rationally. let go of the past, and work on today...
take care
2007-03-14 10:25:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that you're still in pain over this, but you did say she ran over you with lies, bogus allegations, etc. Reading your paragraph, it's like you have a conflicting opinion about the relationship, and even described it as "semi-great."
It's a shame that she is going to move far away with your son, but these things do happen. You can go to court and try to up your custodial rights, but as far as the emotional side of you, it'd be in your best interests to try to get past the hurt and move on. If you truly believe that she is bipolar and this may cause harm towards your child, then I suppose you could use that in your favor - but the key thing would be to never disrespect your ex-wife in the presence of your son. Her behavior could also be due to the fact that she has been unhappy and stressed out.
I can't imagine how you must feel, but for the good of all, you must try to stay strong and face your challenges. Good luck.
2007-03-14 10:08:39 · answer #3 · answered by pokecheckme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get a lawyer. And please for your sake, move forward with your own life. You may have regrets about your past, but the only way to fix that is to move forward and do better with your present and future. If you see where you made mistakes then you are one of the fortunate, perhaps you will try harder not to make the same ones over. Best of luck to you.
2007-03-14 10:04:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to focus on your son. If she has moved on then your feelings are only a way for her to control the situation and you. Think of what is best for your child, that is all that matters now!
2007-03-14 10:24:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should first think about why you love someone who has hurt you so much and continues to hurt you. Second she can't take your son out of state without your permission. Don't let her do it. It will hurt him more than anyone else in the end. Think of him first. That'll put your emotions out of play. Save your son. Who know's what'll happen if he's left with an unstable mother.
2007-03-14 10:03:27 · answer #6 · answered by Seeker 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
do what you feel u need to. will u miss your child? express this in court. Do you need the relationship you have with your child? does your child? when making e=decisions leav eher name face thoughts of her out of your head. itll probably be hard, but you need to. good luck.
2007-03-14 10:03:22 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs.Vick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get back with her
2007-03-14 10:01:39 · answer #8 · answered by Obino 10-10 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋