HELP! I'M TOO EMBARRAST To GO TO HOSPITAL?

Question

i was "playing " with my empty deodorant can and when inserting it, everyting was fine, then..., the cap came off!
now it is stuck "inside" me, what to do
I don't think it will come out naturally.

i can't sit, i'm off the ER.

Answer 1

You have to go to the hospital. Attempting to remove it yourself is unlikely to succeed and, if you do, you shall do damage doing so.

I worked in the medical field for 13 to 15 years (I forgot the dates). I worked in a major hospital in Berkeley, including occasionally the ER.

I can tell you that a deoderant can cap up the *ss is nothing special to the ER staff. Trust me on this one.

The most that shall happen is a giggle at the nurses desk, a shake of the staff's heads and a muttered "got another one in room such and so", getting a temporary nick somewhere along the lines "cap guy" (they usually refer to patients by their ailments, aka, "GSW to abdomen") at the nurses station, and somone is going to say "amateur".

They shall forget you within an hour after you leave. After all, someone might walk in with a large orange or small animal up his next. Or cellular phone, tape recorder, large glass bottle, or... or... or...

You get the idea.

The guy that came into the ER with a gold chain in his bladder made hospital history but you will not. He had a thing of inserting a gold chain in his urethra (I do not recall how he got it there) having his boyfriend jack him of, and pulling out the chain as he climaxed. Well, he lost the erection, the boyfriend was not holding onto the end of the chain, and in it went! He needed surgery.

Suck it up and go to the ER, soldier!

Edit: the cap has a lip on it and the lip is going to be pointed down. That is going to irritate the lining of his colon and the thing is going to be lodged there. The irritation is going to be on the "exit" side of the cap, creating even more of a blockage. It is most likely NOT going to come down on its own.

Answer 2

Well you usually only hear about this stuff from other people. Like the woman with the hotdog.....all those things we hear in small towns. Anyways I have to get to work. Jeas your sitting there with a deoderant cap up you butt and I'm just rambling on. Well guy. This is going to be hard. I'm guessing the the rounded end went up first. You have few options:

1. Goto the hospital - You should really do this. Go to another town so people don't know who you are if you have to.

2. Your going to have to try and rotate the cap inside of yourself. Make the rounded end face the entrance (exit) lol I dont know. But then your going to have to CAREFULLY. Try and push this out of yourself or even try to get a grip on it. Maybe try a vaccuum. (USE A CRAP LOAD OF LUBE HERE). I mean use all the lube you have along with crisco, veg oil. Anything to lube it up to come out. This is going to be very difficult to do. Be careful and safe. But again. You should goto the hospital.

3. Your going to have to break it into pieces. This could be extremely difficult and painful if your not careful. Your rectum is very sensitive and if you cut or damage it you will not feel it because there isn't any nerve endings in there. You will need like nippers (Like you use to cut wire and stuff). Be patient and cut it out in little pieces. Very small. This could take hours. You have to be careful that the plastic does not cut into yourself though. Your only going to know if you really feel around well and keep checking for bleeding. Again you should goto the hospital.

4. Goto the hospital and say you were sexually assulted by someone. Say you were out on the street and someone violated you and you feel that they left something inside of you. Like the violated you with an object but you don't know what. Maybe even get the police involved if your really that scared of what people think of you.

Just goto the hospital man. Its the easiest and the safest way. You don't know if you have damaged anything. You want to avoid damage to your prostate among other things. The way it went in sounds like its not going to pass with bowels. Since plastic takes about 30,000 years to breakdown you maybe waiting a while.

Answer 3

Believe me, the ER has seen worse and you will have to go and get the thing removed. I've seen a few cases with beer bottle and other household items. You could really hurt yourself and at some point, if you wait too long and it doesn't come out naturally, have too much pain and discomfort to care what others think.

Answer 4

If it's not coming out, then go to the hospital. I can promise you they've had weirder things happen. You shouldn't be embarrassed for getting a deordorant cap stuck, plenty of other things have gotten stuck in there and hospitals have seen them.

Answer 5

Yeah right, go to the ER, they've seen it all before. Same story, different objects. You need to go in, they might have to put you to sleep to get it out, cause the rectum contracts, and it's difficult to get stuff out unless the patient is totally asleep. Dangerous to leave it in, could cause permanent damage, so suck it up and go in with whatever story you want. They'll just be interested in taking care of the problem.

Answer 6

What in the world were you thinking sticking it where it didn't belong to begin with?! Just swallow you pride and get yourself to the d@mn hospital and take the lecture that I'm sure that they will give you and remember use something smaller next time like a cucumber or something!

Answer 7

You have to go to the hospital. If that cap is lodged in there, you could be in for some serious health issues. Get over your embarrassment and go.

Answer 8

Taking a laxative is not a good idea. Go to the ER room

Answer 9

Trust me... the things I have seen..... don't be embarresed. You MUST go to the ER and get help.

And you need to buy propper toys next time. But if you dont go to the ER, there may not be a next time. Go

Answer 10

A lot of good advice here, gang; and a few laughs. Doesn't this remind you of the SNL parody, Appalachian Emergency Room? Seriously, I hope you get relief, and soon.