and been together 11 1/2 years,been having problems for the last 2 years.after the argument on the way back from the supermarket he got out of the car and walked off. I can't drive, luckily he came back, drove a bit further up the road and refused to take me any further, he said he would have the kids i could find somewhere else. Anyway to cut a long story short he brought us home and left. Friday morning he threatened to kill himself, then me, he came round friday eve i wouldn't let him in he tried forcing door i called police 1/2 hour later he put window through.saturday i arranged to meet we talked he said it was over. sat eve he sent me texts asking to phone him i ignored him 2 1/2 hours later he came round drunk. He spent day with us on sunday, all fine,saw him most of monday all fine. he says now he doesn't know if he wants to come back, he has 1 change of clothes won't take any more,gets angry when i say i need to get on with my life without him, phones or comes round every day
2007-03-13 23:33:03 · 20 answers · asked by fedupoffbeingrippedoff 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
IMHO, Get the heck out of there!!! and fast!!!
He is manipulating you, can't you see it, he wants you
to get down on your knees and beg him to come home,
that you love him and need him BLAH BLAH BLAH,
Sounds to me, like a loose canon, drunk, threatening,
oh, boohoohoo I'm going to kill myself, you need to go on.
Krips I've heard it ALL! and its crap. Take your kids and go to a women shelter if you have to. Just GO!!! I may not know you but honey one thing I do know is who ever you are You deserve better then that!!
Again, just my opinion.
2007-03-13 23:44:47 · answer #1 · answered by Maggie B 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it's over. If not it should be. Put a TRO on him, have an officer escort him into the home to get some clothes and try to get him into counseling. For your sake and the kids, don't let him back in the home. If he is threatening your lives, you don't need that. Also, you don't want to take the chance of being the headline on the 6 o'clock news. If you are married you can try to get an order from the judge to have him placed in anger management, and AA if needed. Call the local women's shelter to get advice on what to do, they are always willing to help out. Good luck and stay safe.
2007-03-14 09:56:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is so difficult....If you are even considering taking him back after that kind of abuse I hope that you both seek counselling/therapy as a family and as individuals. Think about what you are teaching your kids is acceptable behaviour if their are no consequences for his erratic behaviour. It sounds like there might be some mental illness and/ or drug/ alcohol abuse. I wish you the best but you need to think first and foremost about the kids and their safety and well being. Then yourself. It's very hard to do because there is so much emotion but you need to try to look at things objectively, ask your friends and family how they see things. Everything will work out as long as you take the steps. Good luck!
2007-03-14 06:53:37 · answer #3 · answered by baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack him some clothes and then get a restraining order. You have to do the best for the kids and he sounds dangerous. Its not your responsibility if he harms himself, but if he's threatening you and the kids, that needs to be taken care of. If you feel you need to get him some help, then look into it, otherwise cut the ties now. Good luck.
2007-03-14 06:42:50 · answer #4 · answered by mhm 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need some serious help. It sounds like he could be very dangerous. Next time he causes trouble, or threatens you, call the police, and make sure that the charges stick. It is very unwise to play cat and mouse with someone who is obviously unstable. Your children may get hurt as well.
2007-03-14 07:03:29 · answer #5 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i dont know exactly the main problem, but i think every problem always have an answer. if possible, why dont u talk to him and try to be more understanding. i know its not easy, but if u really think about ur children's future, i guess u should do something. from ur story, am sure ur husband still care about u and the children, but maybe he couldn't handle the situation very well, sometimes it happened bcoz of deep frustrated. i think as his wife u suppose to help him pass trough that. women tends to be more patient and calm when handeling problem. i mean, u have known him for 11 years, am sure u know what to do. get some help. and comunication is very important for a relationship. try to respect him, and always calm, dont ge stress or panic. it makes things more worse than before. if u still love him, and if u still wants ur family united again, please get some help and dont run from it. i wish the best for u. take care.
2007-03-14 06:48:27 · answer #6 · answered by EJ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of this guy.
He threatened to kill you? Are you crazy? Get a personal protection order and take him to court for full custody of the children. Get on with your life, you deserve better.
2007-03-14 07:13:37 · answer #7 · answered by LC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is totally out of control of his anger and of his life. He is irrational and dangerous. You should talk to your lawyer and document all of these incidents, as he is equally likely to escalate all of this into dangerous attacks where you'll have to escape and get a restraining order.
2007-03-14 06:37:21 · answer #8 · answered by charmedchiclet 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes it sounds like it is over if you don't want him back stop letting him come over give him his clothes and let him go so he can find someone else.
2007-03-14 06:38:42 · answer #9 · answered by Mary O 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LADY PUT A RESTRAINING ORDER ON HIS ***!
You and the kids will be just fine trust me there is alot of help out there for you!
DO IT TODAY
Take YOUR POWER BACK!
2007-03-14 06:37:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋