Why am I doing this to myself??? My ex husband is 7 years younger than me, he is an ex because he was a junkie and I caught him cheating with our teeny bopper neighbor.
Why do i still love and care about him??? He was a druggie, and blamed the incident on being high...I know that at times he was high and didn't remember what he had done the night before...He went to rehab voluntarily, and is now serving time for assault because his drug problem...Why do i care...
2007-03-13 19:34:06 · 11 answers · asked by yummymom 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
u may be codependent , which is an addiction to people, behaviors, and things. a co dependents happiness depends on what others do or think.u aren't seeing the circumstances for what they are, and u may be trying to fix things u can't. u feel responsible for him, u just can't see the bad in him, and may be thinking that taking him back will work.
2007-03-14 02:04:14 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is always good to know when a relationship is over, and when it is not.
And as always our heart has all the answers, we just need to listen closer.
I think, mentally you want to move, but in your heart, you know it’s not true.
Love seldom ends with the end of a relationship. Accept that and move on.
Here it is a matter of mind over heart; you can't get over him, because you have a soul contract with him which would not be over, till there is some learning to do at your end as well.
Every relationship not just has a goal but a purpose as well, know that and set yourself free from the confusion and frustration at not being able to let go.
You can’t let go because you are not ready to say goodbye, in your heart.
PS: I suggest an interesting book on this theme called: Getting the Love You Want" by Harvel Hendrix, to get an ample idea of why you attracted such a soul to your life, so that you don't end up doing it all over again, if you have finished your lesson plan as yet.
2007-03-13 19:50:48 · answer #2 · answered by Abhishek Joshi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because he hurt you, doesn't mean you have to stop loving him. Addiction is a disease. Some people never get through it. Nobody ever totally beats it.
The cheating and the being in jail would make it understandable that you divorced him. But, as far as the addiction goes, you wouldn't stop loving him if he had cancer. So, why would you expect yourself to turn off your feelings because he has a different type of disease?
2007-03-13 19:49:55 · answer #3 · answered by penhead72 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You still care because for one if he is your ex there were probably very strong feelings at one time.
Another theory could be that he was dependent on you during his tiff with drugs. This, believe it or not tends to make an almost permanent bond, especially if you were both really close at one time. It probably hurts your heart to see him this way.
The cheating, I hate to stereotype but he is a man...Good luck!
2007-03-13 19:45:45 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No idea but maybe you might be lonely? If you have time on your hands, try learning a new hobby or take up courses to improve yourself and land in a better job. Keeping yourself busy will definitely make you forget the things or people you miss.
2007-03-13 19:39:07 · answer #5 · answered by Ashley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you are a caring person. It is the momma in you to want to help a person. Just because you care does not mean you have to be abused by the addicts problems.
2007-03-13 19:39:55 · answer #6 · answered by ~Raspberry Tea~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you are a good person. May be you just want good out of him. But its all life and this happends. You cant forget things that happends but what you can do is move on. Its not going to be easy. Say your prayers and move on.
2007-03-13 19:38:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you care because you love him.its difficult not to care for a person you were in love with at one time,nor matter how hard you try to pretend that you do not care for your ex,the fact is deep down in your heart, you are still concerned with his well being though you still do not need him in your life.
2007-03-13 22:02:56 · answer #8 · answered by M cute 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, you divorced him because he hurt you. he's the one who decieved you. you divorced him because of what he did and not because you didnt love him anymore. you still have feelings for him but he cheated you. ur not yet over him...take some time away from him...maybe go out on a date or something...
2007-03-13 19:40:58 · answer #9 · answered by vrules 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you are a masochist, wanting what you can't have. How does a junkie cheat? I thoughtt they couldn't get an erection.
2007-03-13 19:41:50 · answer #10 · answered by bestbet77 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋