Having trouble stopping breastfeeding my 17 month old, please no rude comments .?

Question

I've been fortunate enough to stay at home with my baby now 17 months old and I feel it's harder for me to quit breastfeeding than it is her. It's been a very special time for us but I haven't had a full nights sleep in over 2 years and I think it's finally getting to me. I've weaned another son at 9 months and want to keep front putting myself through that much pain again. We are very attached to each other and I wonder if anyone has any subtle ways you've heard to wean babies except quiting cold turkey without getting her really mad at me. Please don't mention cow's milk, I'm too natural to do that to her. She drinks soy occasionally but has never taken a bottle or pacifier. Thanks! Jennifer

Answer 1

If you don't want to give her cows milk, its best that you continue to nurse. I am in the same position with my 14 month old. Hes allergic to cows milk and I know no other way to make sure he gets what he needs than to keep on nursing!
Here is an article on night-weaning, that may help you to get some more sleep... http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html

I wouldnt, persoanlly, reccomend soy, either... I would try raw cows milk before soy, there is just too much controversy surrounding it (re: mercola.com)

Lots of moms feel that they are at the end of thier rope when nursing toddlers... its a demanding job! You can gradually wean her by eliminating a session/day for several weeks/months... but then you would have to find an ulterior source for calcium, vit d and fat (assuming shes taking in enough protein and vit A) The best combo ive been able to come up with for those is bone broth and cod liver oil supps (both of which i already use)...

So, its complicated... Hang in there! Youre giving your little one the best.... maybe set yourself a goal a month or two off and if youre still feeling the way you do now, impliment gradual weaning? http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/how_weaning_happens.html#motherled

Answer 2

I think it's fantastic that you've managed to continue breastfeeding your daughter for this long in the face of rampant public ignorance about extended breastfeeding. I'm still breastfeeding my son at 14 months with no plans of stopping.

That being said, I feel your pain. I've been either pregnant or breastfeeding for the last 3 1/2 years (I went from pregnant to breastfeeding to pregnant to breastfeeding again). So I've been unable to sleep a full night's sleep during that entire time (remember the discomforts of pregnancy? misery for me!) But there is hope -- you might not have to wean your daughter to get a full night's sleep. It's unlikely that your daughter actually NEEDS to nurse in the middle of the night (I say "unlikely" because only you know your daughter, and it is of course possible that she could need it). Have you tried Elizabeth Pantley's "No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers"? I have the book for infants and in that book she give a lot of great ideas for getting your baby to sleep through the night, even breastfed babies, and yes even breastfed co-sleeping babies. Try Pantley's Gentle Removal to help determine when your daughter is feeding in the middle of the night whether or not it is due to hunger or comfort, and if it is for comfort, you can offer other ways to for her to comfort herself. I put a few links at the bottom for you -- benefits of extended breastfeeding (which you probably already know by now anyway), Elizabeth Pantley's website, the Gentle Removal method, and even some weaning sites if you are determined to wean at this point. Personally, I am an advocate of child-led weaning, so I gave you some of those sites to look at as well. I agree with you about cow's milk. While I let my 2 1/2 yr old daughter drink it, I don't push it and I definitely don't give it to my son as long as he has a healthier alternative (breastmilk). Cow's milk is made for building bones, not brains, and your daughter needs the fats in your breastmilk for her growing, developing brain.

Good luck, and feel free to email me with more questions, or just for some support, from one extended breastfeeder to another!

Answer 3

Good on you for feeding for so long.
I think the best way to ease her off is by dropping a feed every few days. I found this hard as I didnt have a feeding schedule it was just demand.
So start with one feeding say in the early afternoon or morning, just distract her until she forgets about it. Then continue doing that for a few days. Once she is used to that, then drop another feed. Until all day time feeds have stopped.
I think the bedtime one is the last to go. So start setting up a bedtime routine that doesnt involove breastfeeding (at the same time as dropping feeds).
Continue the night feeds until she has none all day. Then slowly shorten the amount of feeding time at bedtime, and let her adjust to the new bedtime routine and she should settle right down.


Hope this helped you.

Answer 4

I really don't have any advice to add about ways to wean your baby, other than eliminating one feeding at a time and replacing it with a cup. Even if you do continue to breastfeed, at this age, you baby should be getting juice or water from a cup. Some words of encouragement though - one of my cousins continued to breastfeed her daughter up to age 4. Good job for breastfeeding this long and good luck.

Answer 5

Perhaps your pediatrician can offer some suggestions. It's wonderfull you have been able to breastfeed. I'm sure your child will benefit from it. Just remember no one has ever started collage still breastfeeding from their mom.