Men would you really want to know??and who would you rather here this from?

Question

If you had a child by an ex.gf that she never told you about?I was young only 19 yrs old when i got pregnant at the time i was no longer dating my ex.bf whom my parents hated we were just having a fling at the time and he was with another girl.I did not want to cause any drama so i kept my mouth shut never told anyone.My son is now 3.5 years old and i am married now for 6 months.I was not aware that when my hubby wanted info about my past that he new my sons bio-dad from highschool.Men who would you rather here this info from your ex.gf or on of your buddys?

I have a feeling my hubby is going to spill this secret anyay so why no beat him to it?

I am talking about my ex.bf who i dont want to take me to court if he finds out on his own!

Answer 1

good job, exactly 17 minutes since the last time you asked.......you lied; you screwed up.......you should have told him the whole truth long before you married him.


your husband has been gone for 3 days, he's already told him.......

Answer 2

I've read your other questions on this topic.
If I have the chronology clear it goes like:
You got pregnant by an ex boyfriend and never told anybody.
You had the child and kept the secret of who the father was.
You started a relationship with another guy and did not immediately tell him about your son.
When you did tell him he accepted the situation and you then got married.
After marriage he asked you who the biological father of your son was and you told him.
Your husband has difficulty forming a relationship with your son and is upset because he knows the biological father.

Assuming that I have the sequence straight and this is the whole of the problem I still fail to totally understand.

I don't understand why your husband is upset that he knows the bio-father from high school. Would it be better if it were a stranger or you didn't know who the father was apart from maybe one of the seven following names?

I don't understand why he wanted to marry, knowing that you had a son, if having a son were a problem to him.

I don't understand why he waited until after marriage to ask who the father of your son was if the issue was important to him.

I think that your husband has more issues in this matter than you do. He needs to understand that this was not discussed by you only because in your mind it wasn't relevant. The ex has been an ex for a long time and you definitely don't want to go back there, if you did you would have told your ex that he was the father. He needs to understand that you may regret the method by which you got your son but that you do not regret having him. He is your son and nothing to do with the ex. He is probably trying to reject the ex by rejecting your son and needs to realize that he is only rejecting you.
I think that your ex boyfriend is irrelevant and certainly you don't need to tell him. He does not have a son, you do. If somebody else chooses to tell him stories you have no need to confirm or deny.
You have a son, a husband and that is where you should focus.

Answer 3

I think it's up to you to tell him, and soon. Don't let your hubby tell, that's not fair. The bio dad should know about his child and be able to ask you any questions he may have. Be prepared he may want to get to know his son.

Answer 4

I am quite certain they would want to know just like you would want to know and hey how many times do you have to ask the same question over and over, dont you get it - you lied to both of them, you obviously are feeling guilty - so spill the beans before its too late.

Answer 5

if it leaks out no big deal you are the mother of the cild and if he takes you to court he will just have to pay support. things happen and there is nothing we can do to change this so dont worry about it.

Answer 6

Be a human being and tell him yourself.

Answer 7

i will see u on the Maury show.

Answer 8

My husband wanted to.

Answer 9

man - you love this question eh?