My husband occassionally uses the phrase "Right now I refuse to accept your apology".
To me it has always meant 'I don't believe you', 'I don't forgive you yet' or something of the like. But he says it doesn't really mean anything.
What do you think he really means by that? Can someone enlighten me?
2007-03-13 10:45:58 · 38 answers · asked by Kaley G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It means at that moment just an apology isn't enough to just make up for whatever it is you did.
2007-03-13 10:49:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your apology sincere? Is he having trouble accepting an apology because you have repeatedly been down this same road before? If this is an area that has surfaced again and again...perhaps that is why he is having problems forgiving and forgetting and he is needing time to get over the hurt. On the other hand, in your defense, marriage is not always 50/50....but sometimes 80/30. Meaning, we all make mistakes and must go the extra mile sometimes to strive for a peaceful/loving relationship. When a spouse truly loves you ...he will go that extra mile to smooth over the trouble spots and be willing to forgive and go on.
2007-03-13 10:59:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It used to drive me batty when my ex would cause pain and suffering with me, and then tell me an apology. Then I realized she was apologizing for the same insults, again, and again. Apology's work well when an event is without malice. If your apologizing over and over for the same thing, then get some sizable blaster. Your going to need it. When the apologies outnumber the kisses you've got a tough repair to do.Pattern repetition is the fastest way to go nuts, and a pattern that includes a relatively cheap apology might really raise a lot of hell.Especially if it's over, over, and over, again.
2007-03-13 11:04:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
some. I refused to settle for an apology from my ex-uncle for being an abused a$$. I refused to settle for an apology from an ex (between the) that cheated. For the main section I forgive, yet i do no longer EVER forget approximately it. 2 strikes and you're out with me.
2016-10-18 07:31:33 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Right now, I refuse to accept your apology. It means something, but not that he doesnt believe you...it means he needs time to mull it over.....probably because he is still angry. Just because you are sorry for something, doesnt mean to say it will take the hurt/anger of the other person away immediately....he has feelings too, and probably needs time to calm down....to think things out, then, when hes in a better frame of mind, a clamer frame of mind, he will forgive you. I have been in that situation myself....I am hurt and angry then someone says they are sorry....fair enough they may be sorry, but I cant just switch off my anger/hurt because someone says something....it may be from the heart....but like your husband, I need time to get rid of my anger/hurt....at my own pace, not when the person who says they are sorry expects it.
2007-03-13 10:53:23 · answer #5 · answered by rightio 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is a spirit of intimidation. He want you to suffer and hurt because he is hurting and that is not fair. If you ask for forgiveness and you apologize to him. If he don't or want except, know that you did the right thing and leave it in the hand of God. You are in right standard with God. While he trying to cool down he could die with unforgiveness in his heart. Waiting to blow it over or cool down could cause him this death straight to hell. Either he accept now or never. Men/Women like to play on people emotions. But when the shoe is on the other foot they can't take it. This is why their are many divorces because one has taken too long to forgive and allow the enemy to enter their marriage and tare it up. the bible say don't let the sun goes down on your wrath. (Meaning don't goes to bed with anger in your heart.)
2007-03-13 11:23:21 · answer #6 · answered by victory 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means he is still mad and just wants to be left alone.
Let him cool off and then talk about your problem.
From my experiences I always wait a while before talking- cause in the heat of things you could say something that maybe does not come out right and worsen the whole thing- So let things COOL down.
2007-03-13 10:57:30 · answer #7 · answered by Taz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This means that your husband is having a hard time forgiving you. If you have apologized to him many times before and he says the same things over and over again, it is he who is unwilling to accept your apologies. You have come to him to apologize, so it is up to him to accept it. If he doesn't accept your apology, then at least you did your part and it is in his hands now.
Now, if you make the same mistake over and over again and he is getting tired of you doing that, plus you apologize to him over and over again for it, he is not taking your seriously so it makes him not to accept your apologies anymore. Hope I didn't confuse you. Another wards, he is getting tired of you apologizing even if you are still doing that same thing.
2007-03-13 11:00:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok..it means he is so upset or mad at whats been said or done that he can't forgive you just yet..and to give him time to think or time to calm down. He might be one of those people that need time and space. He is so upset that an apology is not enough.
Hope I could help.
2007-03-13 10:53:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps it means he wants time to pout in the corner for a while? I do know that a real man would accept his wife's apology, & be done with it. Either he accepts your apology right then & now, or he doesn't, period. He's playing head games with you & I wouldn't play if I was you.
2007-03-13 10:54:43 · answer #10 · answered by Shortstuff13 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What I think is Forgiveness is first a decision,then a process.
If someone has been hurt really bad before, they find it hard to forgive in the first place.I would rather have someone say I'm not ready to forgive, instead of I forgive you and not really forgive you.My husband is like your husband it's hard for him to forgive certain things.Sometime, I think he really never forgives certain people who hurt him deeply.It's all about
the past.
2007-03-13 11:09:40 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋