I found out I was bi six years ago (in 7th grade) and I haven't told anyone in all this time. I've been wanting to have someone to talk to about it but I've just never had the guts to say anything. Back then it was because I only had one friend (I was really shy) and I didn't want to risk being left alone. Now it's because me and my friends always banter about being in love with one another (I only have female friends) and when we joke around we've like, groped each other and stuff. And I have kissed one of them at a party... I'm scared they will act funny around me if I tell them, that they will get paranoid and think I got the hots for them or something. To make matters even worse I have some feelings for the friend that I kissed... and I've been acting kind of strange around her. If I tell them she will definitely suspect me... but I can't live like this and never tell anyone! I'm going crazy here, plz help?
2007-03-13 10:41:39 · 14 answers · asked by loveless_sselevol 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
i'm suprised you've managed to keep it a secret for this long. does anybody in your family know? i remember the first people i told about myself were my sister and a friend of mine but they were both ok about it and made me feel confident about telling people but with me it's like they always guess it before i even tell them and then they're like never really shocked. do you think there could be anybody who in your mind would be easy to tell to? sometimes guys who are just your friends are the easiest ones to tell depending if they are close to you but atleast they won't think that you were secretly checking them out. i don't know should you tell everybody you know, just tell the people you feel it would be easy to tell to. i think if atleast somebody who's close to you would know you'd feel better. it feels great when there's somebody who knows and accepts the real you and who you don't have to hide things from.
2007-03-13 11:00:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Coming out will allow you to be your true self around the people that you are close with. It can be a very liberating experience. The question is How to come out? If you come out and sound embarrassed and ashamed of yourself, and make a big deal out of it, it might not go so well. You don't have to rub it into people's faces, but you can just drop it casually, matter-of-factly. Even if you have questionned your sexuality for a while now, you can tell your friends that you have recently started to wonder about it, and ask for their help to help you clarify the matter. For example, ask your friend to accompany you to a gay bar or district in your area, just to look around. It might end up as fun for both of you!
2007-03-13 10:52:10 · answer #2 · answered by Yara K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoah, whoah. Wait a minute. If you guys grope each OTHER, then ur ALL bi to a certain extension! And if you kissed the friend that you like, and if she kissed you BACK, then yeah, u guys are bi. LOL. Damn, that's gotta be cool. And even if u guys "pretend" that ur just joking around, trust me, maybe there are other ppl in ur group who are bi as well. But maybe they're afraid to admit it too!
2007-03-13 10:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about why you think you need to tell them. Do they really, really need to know? And why?
Of course, don't deny it if this comes up in conversation. But please don't make it a conversation in itself.
I know, I've been there. When we finally realize our natural, inborn sexual orientation, we want to shout it from the rooftops. Quite honestly, many people do not care.
True friends will not treat you any differently when they find out.
Is there a gay-straight alliance at your school or nearby where you can talk with other LGBT youth? That's where I would suggest you have this conversation with other like-minded people.
Good luck!
2007-03-13 10:47:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them. If they are truly your friends, they will understand and support you. I told mine (well, alomst all of them--the others who are obviously anti-bisexual/homosexual I haven't told yet) and they all support me. Except my ex-boyfriend, who accidentally found out and then proceeded to freak out and has never calmed down since.
My biggest problem is finding a girlfriend. My friends don't even bring it up!!! It was like, "ok. you're bi. I never thought you, of all people, would be bi, but ok. That's cool. Whatever."
2007-03-13 10:47:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell them. The longer you keep groping each other and don't tell them, the more used/betrayed/lied to they'll feel. It's better to get it over with and salvage what friendships you can.
2007-03-13 19:00:58 · answer #6 · answered by carora13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure your friends will not get paranoid... especially since you kiss them. If you tell them you are bi you might even hook up with that friend you kissed.
Good luck!!
2007-03-13 10:56:55 · answer #7 · answered by Crazy Girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends will always be on your side. They will still like you for whatever you are. Otherwise they're not "true" friends.
2007-03-13 10:51:16 · answer #8 · answered by Joseph_G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i would not because the would tell the whole world
if you feel that they are your real friends give it a shot why not
2007-03-13 10:47:04 · answer #9 · answered by chopperfan95 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them, it is betrayal if you don't since you have feelings for one of them. It sure is risky but it's the right thing to do.
2007-03-20 02:44:37 · answer #10 · answered by Cheng 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋