Im a teen mother and im scared?

Question

OKay i am a 15 year old mother...and my baby is 2 weeks old. Me and his father who is 17 are doing t his together but i am scared. I mean there are soo many things that could go wrong...what if he leaves are what if we dont have the money or what if i cant finish school...all of these things are going runninh through my head and i dont want to talk to the babys dad about them cause i dont want tp stress him out more but i am juss scared....i could really use someone else advise...am i over reacting or are these thoughts that everyone has???please help

Answer 1

Darlin, it will all be okay. These thoughts are normal. I'm sure you're scared but there is always an answer. Try talking to your parents, or if you go to church, try talking to your Pastor or his wife. Believe me, you will make it through just fine! Don't worry, you'll have peace once you get used to being a mother!

Answer 2

Yes! All your thoughts and fears are normal as they are normal for all new parents, no matter what their age is!
I was 17 when I married and I had my first son at 18. I was terrified but you know what, there isn't any room for judgment! What's done is done! And no! In my opinion you should not give this baby up for adoption! That is a lot of the problem with people. Instead of taking responsibility for their actions, they find a way out! Running away from a problem is not the answer. As long as you both are supportive of each other than it will work, just don't give up.
Now, talk with the baby's father! Most of the time communication between couples really does make all the difference. I am sure he is just as scared as you are! Families are supposed to come together in times like this. Start doing it now. You have a tough road ahead of you but you will be fine. Be tough, be responsible,and don't worry as much! I know this is easier said than done, but, worry is just bad for you. Your baby is a beautiful gift from God! Love your baby and cherish your baby! You will look back one day and realize that it is all worth it. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers! And if you have a religion, try going and talking to someone at your church.You will be amazed at the support! Good Luck!

Answer 3

Please get help from your parents - not monetary, financial help, just the help of knowing they are present in your life. You are still a kid yourself and you have a kid - that's what scares you. If you have no money at all, anywhere, to fall back on, you will be scared too. That's where being able to go home when there is no rent money or food money is very very important.
You have to grow up fast. Honey, I know that is hard. I also know it is gradual but you will do it.
Love your baby, love yourself, write down some goals, even if they are day to day goals. Give yourself some credit for the positive things you do. Try to make friends with other moms - if you can find them (ask your guidance counselor at school if she knows some groups of moms where you can find some friendship and support).
All these things are positive. Be receptive to love and friendship. It will only help you during what is a stressful time. And remember, babies get older and they stay cute even when they are a handful.

Answer 4

Your nor over reacting..........Everything is possible. But these questions do arise onto everyone AGE doesn't matter. It's typical for any parent to feel this way. But u should have an open communication with your partner. He should know how u feel and both of you face each others fears together. If he leaves, you can still make it through........many schools offer child care, counseling, and classes for young mother like u. There is a lot of support at schools..... Well atleast here in South Texas there is. U should probably ask for help at school and what better than your relatives and friends!! Even us older women need that help!! If u need someone to talk to you can email me at [e-mail]

Answer 5

I've over twice your age with far greater resources (secure finances and career, live-in nanny, maid, stay at home spouse) and even I have the same fears you have. It's entirely natural to worry about this new bundle of joy in your life. What if this, what if that, will this happen, will that?

Truthfully, it's going to get a bit worse before it gets better. You'll soon start suffering from sleep deprivation and that will make everything more tense. You might have a fight with your boyfriend about this or that, or see the bank account and start to worry.

One of the keys to dealing with this is communication with your boyfriend, not in worried or stressed tones, but as a reasonable and rational adult (sorry, your time as a kid is over). Express your fears without raising your voice, outline your plan for doing things over the next 3-6-9 months, and then until you graduate from school. If you parents are still involved, or his parents, communicate with them what you hope to accomplish in the near and long term. See what they are willing to provide, whether it be financial assistance or even just babysitting so you can go see a movie (which is now a luxury, I should note)

I would **strongly** recommend going over to Babycenter.com and start communicating with other mommies who have had babies this month. They have message boards for each month and probably every single thing you are about to experience is being discussed over there daily.

http://www.babycenter.com/boards/bcus2007

Good luck.

Answer 6

I didn't have my first child until I was 19 but both of my little sisters had their children at age 15. And although they never voiced it, I am sure that they were scared and they had every right to be as do you. Having a baby at such an early age is a lot to take on. You're going to have to grow up sooo fast but not to worry. There are programs that will help you to make sure that you finish school and are able to provide for your child. I am not trying to make you the poster child for welfare if that's how it is coming off because neither of my sister's depended on that. My youngest sister and her daughter's father both did drop out of school only to attend a school that provided daycare. Believe it or not it was a christian school. But it was neat because it accepted them and their daughter and they both were able to complete school. Actually 2 years early. Don't focus on the negatives. Just think of the endless possibilities, of the life that you want to provide for your child and know what it is going to take to achieve. Be strong!! I am not going to lie and say it will be easy but take one day at a time. I don't know how strong your faith is but now may be the time to start some serious talking with the big guy. I am a firm believer that everything in our lives happen for a reason (be it good or bad) but trust that God would never put you through anything that you handle. As for your baby's dad, as women that is where we always make our biggest mistakes. Don't worry about whether or not he is going to leave you in the future. Do what you have to do to take care of your child. Because whether daddy is there or not, it's still mama's baby. If it's meant to be, it will be.

Answer 7

You should talk with your bf about how you are feeling. You both are so young and you can make it but it will be hard. You need to complete your education. Money will definitely be tight but do not let anything interfere with your education. The baby and you deserve to have a good life and you will not be able to do that as well without an education. Hopefully, you have family that will step up and help you. You are facing a life long responsibility that will not be easy. The joy will outweigh the hard times though it just may not feel like it at times. Good luck to you, your bf and the baby.

Answer 8

All of these thoughts are normal. There are so many things that can go wrong. Most of the time, they don't, but that's because you have to be aware and careful.

That's why people frown on children like you having children, because you are not emotionally strong enough for this task and your child, you, and your boyfriend are going to suffer tremendously because you have made a baby when you were still a child.

Finish school? Are you aware that an infant that endures more than 10 hours a week separation from mommy gets emotionally messed up, suffers intellectually, develops social skills problems, and is sick far more often than kids who don't suffer the agony of being apart from mommy?

Too bad you didn't give this baby up to grownups to raise. Too bad you were playing grownup with sex, when you should have been practicing piano or reading a book.

It's not too late to give up the baby. It's not too late for the baby to get a shot at a decent life.

Answer 9

I don't think you are over reacting. These are all valid concerns to have. If you plan on staying with your boyfriend you should feel secure enough to speak to him about your concerns.
If you do end up breaking up you could try looking for help from your parents or another family member.
Also many schools have programs for teenage mother's to help them get through school.
You could also apply for State assistance (welfare).
Another option is to talk to your doctor about the concerns maybe she/he can give you some good advice.
good luck
No matter what, stay in school, it's the best way to secure a future for yourself and your baby.

Answer 10

you are facing some really grown-up issues and you are not old enough to handle them but you are trying any way and i know you will do it

you can and will get though this all of your worries are normal and understandable

will he leave you and the baby ?? do you really think he would stand by you for this long and then just walk away now ??

yes you will finish school

and you should talk to him you never know he may have all the same feelings as you are having right now