My Aunt, Uncle and their two children never seem to have time to join the rest of the family in certain events, say oh like..birthday parties. They missed my wifes because of Tae Kwon Do class, they missed my Aunts because of a movie at a church. They are missing mine because of Tae Kwon do Class. And they are going to miss my Grandfather and my sons because of Tae Kwon do testing.
YES My Uncle has Money and his own business, He has done LOTS FOR ME. He has given me a job. He gave me $1000 one christmas, and My Aunt told me I shouldn't be complaining because I know that If I was ever in a bind they would be there for me in a heartbeat.
Am I asking too much, for them to participate in FAMILY celebrations??
Who is wrong here???
My mom is so angry with them she was crying on the phone today
HELP
2007-03-13 08:35:27 · 9 answers · asked by brian_d_long2006 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We have been lead on. They called wanting to know where my B-day party was going to be, it didn't matter..they already knew they weren't coming.
Also, they called and asked us to call them before meeting at our house for my Aunt's party, when we called them, they were in the middle of a movie and couldn't make it......
They blow us off for material things...and try to make up for it with expensive gifts. We are not that way, I would give all the gifts back for that togetherness again.........
2007-03-13 08:45:39 · update #1
try talking to them before you schedule an activity to see when they will be available if it is important for them to attend. they sound like busy people. Maybe it's just not their thing...it doesn't mean they don't love ya'll....but their priorities are a little askew.
2007-03-13 08:42:50 · answer #1 · answered by Erinyes 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to say it but it sounds like they are too busy with their own busy lives to spend time with the rest of you (the rest of the people in the family). Some people get so wrapped up in material things such as buying items, or taking classes, or attending sport events, etc. they forget about the most important aspects of everyone's lives, which is family. It appears as though your Aunt and Uncle really love you as they say they will be there if you are ever in a bind, and I'm sure that is true. Someday, they will realize the importance of family and hopefully it won't be too late.
2007-03-13 15:45:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be that they have issues of their own that they are dealing with that makes them uncomfortable to be around the family. They may not want you to know, or they may be trying to deal with something, and not feeling sociable. Whatever the reason is, remember that it is their problem, because their the ones missing out on the good stuff (family togetherness). Focus on what you've got!
2007-03-13 15:50:29 · answer #3 · answered by Lady M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...
So why cant you just ask them to be there? Seems to me they always have a busy schedule...I would imaguine he does care for you so you you will have to ask them in advance to be there for your party...This will give them time to check therer schedules..if you want them there really bad you may have to make the party on a day they are available (but remember others may not be available on that day)...
As long as they recieve the invitations it is up to them to come and join the celebrations no matter what it is.....Maybe they are just so busy with there activities that they dont realize its affectingyourfamily..You may need to sit down and speak to them about it...Dont beat around the bush just tell them how it makes you feel..Obviously if your family has a business they will now how to speak about it and so forth...
As to who is wrong ?? I dont think anyone is wrong it is up to them to join in your celebrations..If they dontthen they may not know what they are missing...there loss ya know...
Good Luck~
2007-03-13 15:47:52 · answer #4 · answered by **Mishelly** 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hmmm...it sounds that they feel an obligation to family, say when it comes to money, but have otherwise chosen to separate themselves. I doubt you will change them. I would say show them you are happy when they do participate, and otherwise leave it alone. Being made to feel guilty will probably backfire in the form of resentment.
2007-03-13 15:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by ~ Claire ~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think everyone needs to cut them a break. It sounds like they just have a busy schedule, and have to miss some family events, it doesn't mean they don't love you any less.
2007-03-13 15:41:56 · answer #6 · answered by Valerie S 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My uncle missed my mom's (his sister's) FUNERAL because he was racing. My aunt told everyone at the funeral home that my mom "would have wanted it that way." Obviously they didn't know my mom very well.
Maybe you should write a letter to your aunt/uncle and tell them how much the family misses them at get-togethers. Tell them you'd like to be closer to them.
2007-03-13 15:39:41 · answer #7 · answered by searching_please 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe they just don't enjoy family get-togethers and prefer instead to pursue their interests. Whilst it may be hurtful at least they are being honest - at least they're not leading you to believe they'll come and not show up. I would talk to them about it, but it may be that you'll have to accept they won't change.
2007-03-13 15:42:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say just be happy for what you have...they seem to be the kind of people who show love through money; not a bad deal.
2007-03-13 15:39:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋