of the affair. He is going for sole custody of my niece. My question is, does he have a chance of getting it? He works full time, my sister has been a stay at home mom for most of my neices life, but just started working part time a couple of months ago. Guess who she is cheating with? Her boss, who is also married with kids!!! Has anyone been through a similar situation? Know anyone this has happened too. I think it will KILL my sister if she loses her daughter. Would a judge take her away for what she has done? Serious answers only please.
2007-03-13 07:52:36 · 30 answers · asked by snowwhite 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
By the way, I dont agree with what she has done, I am on his side here. Sister or not.
2007-03-13 08:06:15 · update #1
I sure hope he does for the kids sake.
She may have been a great mom before the affair, and she may be again. However, she has demonstrated a lack of judgment here.
Affairs are abusive behavior, and her husband is right to protect his children from her behavior.
She could always swallow her pride, say her behavior was wrong and seek to repair the damaged marriage.
2007-03-13 07:57:53 · answer #1 · answered by camys_daddy 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your sister should of thought about all this before she did the deed.
Sadly her bosses family may now also be damaged further by this...No one ever seems to realize just how many people get hurt when people cheat!!!!
The father will have the same opportunity as your sister to get custody. And depending on how old your niece is she will also be talking to the judge and the judge and mediator will make the decisions for her...
I hope your sister has learned her lesson...
2007-03-13 14:59:22 · answer #2 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've seen it done, and yes if Negligence is confirmed then your sister is finished, because courts still say a parents has no right to cheat, the!
The worst thing is if he wants to he could have her arrested for assault on his person because she touched him without informing him that she was sleeping with another person, and endangering his life with the chance of getting an STD!
The best this for her to do right now is quit job, dump guy and try an salvage her marriage because if her husband has proof of wrong doing, it's over!
The best thing for you to do is tell your sister you'll be there for your neice only, not her because the courts might view the whole thing and place child in a relatives family!
One more thing your sister has destroyed two family's do you really think she really the right person to raise a child with no integrity for her family or the other persons family?
2007-03-13 15:03:36 · answer #3 · answered by Free-Lance 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the only ways that a man can get custody at least in Washington where I live is to have proof have an affair. If there are both good parents and no one is drinking, drugs etc then he does have a pretty good chance of getting custody. This is what happended to my best friend and now she doesn't have her kids except for on the weekends.
2007-03-13 14:57:49 · answer #4 · answered by The Voice Of Reason 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A mom can wash and clean and cook and feed the children, take them to tutoring, the doctor, wash the vomit off when they have the flu etc, and nobody cares. It is all invisible in the eyes of the law. (Makes you want to go to sperm bank) If he has DNA in the kids, the law is as blind to her life poured into her children or poured into shoe shopping, or golfing or excessive sports watching, xbox etc.. Many judges don't care who did what as long as the law is not broken. Adultery is not illegal. As long as she didn't leave the home/or marriage. (Judges have affairs too but stay married!) In our county they make people go to a mediator. During that 30-45 min that decides how kids are going to live, they make the recommendation and judges follow it, slams the gavel and "next case". She needs to be confident, radiant and be the sweetest, happiest mom ever. I've seen this be a lot easier with an extra man boosting mom's ego. If the child thinks dad is anger filled they won't want to be with him. If dad losses his temper about the affair at home, or touches agressively her without her consent, it's assult, that's the law, if he does anything aggressive to the child during the agurement too, it is in your sister's favor, but it needs to be reported to the police immediately. If the child thinks dad will treat them like royalty and best friends and equals the mediators go "awe" the kids want to be with daddy.., okay.
She is needs to be a bit imperiovous, and at the same time, consult a lawyer and if it comes to divorce, make a legal request for hime to pay her lawyer since he has long standing higher steady income. If the worst happens, she may be required to pay child support too.
2007-03-13 15:58:12 · answer #5 · answered by so tired 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that the judge is going to take the child away from her unless she was having sex in front of her daughter with her boss .
If your sister and her husband was smart they would go joint custody much better for the child and a lot easier for the parents that gives them a break from time to time . Not easy raising a kid by yourself even if you are getting child support.
I think your brother in law is just mad and trying to get even with her but that means nothing to the judge unless there's some sort of child abuse.
2007-03-13 15:11:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, I know it must be hard for your brother in law and you, but I will put my foot out here and if I offend you accept my apology. Your brother in law has a good case for divorce decree, but if he wants to get his baby away from the mother it will be hard,also it depends on what state you are all in.
The only way that he can get the full custody is if the mother is abusing the daughter, and if he got the evidence against her. so tell your brother in law that he will have a hard time to fight, but he can ask the lawyer also. If you ask me the girl will be better off with her daddy,cause the life she's leading on is not good and a bad influence for the girl. Hope this help and good luck!!
2007-03-13 15:36:51 · answer #7 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think the affair is used against her as far as custody goes. I have a sister going through the same thing except that her "affair" was in rumor only. Her lawyer told her that what they look at is how she has raised her children. She has that going for her the fact that she was a stay at home mom.
2007-03-13 15:00:34 · answer #8 · answered by Luis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think a judge will take away the kid from her. He may give parental custody to her father and let her mom have parental rights and visitation. I know she's your sister and this is hard, but it sounds to me like her character isn't the kind that needs to be raising a baby. Now, she may be a very good mom, but my theory is cheating on your husband is one thing, but cheating on your baby is something totally different, and that's what she's doing. Dad sounds pretty stable and maybe it's a good thing for the baby to be with him. You will still get to see her I'm sure. Maybe this is what mom needs to wake up and realize that it's wrong to kiss your baby with a mouth that isn't reserved for her daddy. Sorry honey, but I'm with your brother-in-law if I found out my babies daddy was cheating I'd do the same thing.
2007-03-13 14:59:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, there's a chance she could lose the child but more likely they'll have to share custody (unless one of them is proven to be unfit).
She doesn't sound like much of a role-model though so it probably wouldn't be a bad thing for the child if her father did get primary custody.
Your sister should've thought about what the repercussions of her actions (possibly losing her child) were before she decided to step out on her husband. Karma...
2007-03-13 14:58:31 · answer #10 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋