WHY is it?

Question

That I show my wife more love than any one and she treats me like crap sometimes. She says she loves me but she doesn’t know why she hurts me and says awful things to me and I don’t deserve that hurt especially from her. She gets mad over nothing then goes off on me and says the most hurtful things you could imagine. Things that I would not even say to my worst enemy then she apologies and ask for forgiveness and says she don’t understand why she does the things that she does. I love my wife with all my heart and it hurts so bad the way she treats me with her words, she has went to one counseling session by herself and says things are going to change but I see no change in 6 months, she is either the most loving wife at times or she is like a stranger that I do not even know. All this hurtfulness is Harding my heart for her which I don’t want to happen any advice, any one else ever been in a relationship like this thanks for your help.

Answer 1

She needs to see a psychologist. I bet she has a chemical imbalance that is causing her outbursts. I know, because I went through this myself and my husband told me if I didn't get help, he would leave me. The medicine has made all the difference in the world!

Good luck!

Answer 2

ONE counseling session does not help anyone.... when a person goes into therapy, they have to give the therapist their history and let them know what their life problems and issues might be....

this takes a bit of time, and many sessions.

and it also takes WORK to change and improve ourselves.

your wife is obviously miserable about something -- and seems to have anger issues, or some other emotional problem.

if you like, you could suggest marriage counseling (which takes wayyy more than one session to get results). that way, you could work on issues together.

just a thought.

Answer 3

okay I've never been married but i have been that person to hurt someone so I'll share my experience and may be it Will help. i was mean to a person because i i did not like certain things that he did and instead of speaking them out i held them in and to cover up my feelings i reacted negatively. every little thing they did that i did not approve of made me like a ticking time bomb. i too would just try to show more love once again to cover it up or when i was getting tired of that person i reacted that way. but if she is willing to go to counseling then she really wants to try and stop hurting you so much but it will not happen overnight especially if she has alot of past issues going on within her. you may need to go in on some so you can have some possible ways of coping while she's trying to heal but patience is a virtue and don't harden your heart just yet try to see if she will reveal her inner most secrets to you so you van help her heal as well and be a better person.

Answer 4

I really think it's the female hormones, we, women, tend to imagine incredible situations and it interferes with reality, but most of all it's the fact that we are just too comfortable and too close, sort of like when we used to snap at our parents when we lived together. It is sad when my husband does it to me- so free with words he uses without thinking how much they hurt, I sometime wish he would talk like this to some female co-workers and see what kind of reaction he will get. What I do to prevent that from happening is I sometimes pretend I just met my husband to evaluate the situation and to be more objective, then I realize if it was another person, not necessarily man, I would be more polite to them.
watch out for your heart - you don't want to become vengeanceful

Answer 5

maybe since you love her so much she knows that no matter what you say, you will still love her. maybe she is having a bad day and wants to take it out on someone and it's usually you. you should go to COUPLES therapy because then you too can hold each other accountable, and maybe go several times not just once. show her that you can listen to her problems but you dont want to the be the punching bag

Answer 6

depending on the age of your wife.But she needs to go to docter and be checked.She may have a cimical inbalance.Which would make her hormoins "all'out of wack.I am 29 and starting having the same problem with my husband at the age of about 24or25 had a miscarriage and it messed me all up.Dr diagnoised me.manic depressive.I take ZOLOFT every day and now we are fine.12 years and going strong.
I hope this helps good luck!
sincereley christinac

Answer 7

Marriage is full of ups and downs, the most important thing is to NOT GIVE UP!

Maybe, you should go to couples' therapy, that way she can hear your side of the story and how her moods are affecting you and your love for her.

We always take our problems out on the ones closest to us, remember that.

Answer 8

Perhaps she needs to change counselors. If she's been seeing this one for 6 mos, obviously this one is NOT helping the situation. Sounds as tho she has resentment towards you for some reason.

Answer 9

I used to do that to my husband...Poor guy...I realized what Iw as doing and went to see someone...They put me on mood stablilizers and I have counseling, plus my husband has been helping me thru it all, and we have now started marriage counseling...FYI nothing will change until she knows what she is doing.

Answer 10

She sounds Bi-Polar.....she might need meds. You need to ask her to go back to the Dr.

If not you have to understand that you do not deserve to be in a relationship where you are not happy!