I just had a phone call about my husband that left me freaked out. What should I do about this situation?

Question

We have become pretty friendly with our tenants who live in the same duplex as we do. They are a couple about 10-15 years younger than us.
The wife just called me and told me that she is getting freaked out because my husband has been calling her on her cell phone at work for unimportant things. She had told him that she couldn't really get calls at work,she was too busy.
He left her a message on her cell last week,and when she didn't answer, he asked her if she was mad at him. She also said that twice he went into their section of the basement and shined a light up their stairs.
I think I would feel the same way if her husband was calling me at work. What gives? Does he have some kind of crush on her? I will talk to him tonight about it, but I just don't know what to think..

We have been married seven years,and I've never had reason to not trust him.

Answer 1

Well, first, you are right to talk with him. And dont come at him like your mad and all, just like you are concerned b/c of the fact that she is calling You about HIM..... Something clearly is not right, but dont just jump on her side until you find out his side. Now have you had any reason AT ALL to be suspicous of him? How does your husband act around her when you are there? Also, if you can get any records that he is calling her like she said, get it together, just in case he wants to lie. Just be prepared. And make sure you are looking at him directly in the eyes when you ask him about her. Good Luck!!!!

Answer 2

You left some very important details out, such as how long you have been married, yet clue you left me was that they're a couple 10-15 years younger than both of you, now that tells me something. I will say this to you, you must know your own husband better than that.
Personally I call it a bunch of crap as in Crappy the fish.
I had personal experience in this area and it was all made up lies because of a situation.
Yes, talk to your husband and above all don't sound like you are accusing him.

Answer 3

I would not blow up or even mention it until you look at the bill if possible to determine if he really is doing this. Also, I think I would ask to listen to the message he left on her phone. If she did not save the message, I would be suspicious he really did it. Some people are just trouble makers and I would make sure she is legitimate before you go jumping to conclusions. Also, if it is a real problem, she should have brought it up with you, your husband and her husband present and not be sneaking around about it.
If everything pans out like she says, I would question him about it and find out what gives.

Answer 4

Why don't you ask her to let you listen to the messages he allegedly left on her phone? Maybe he's really trying to make a pass at her, but what if she's just a trouble maker? Has he behaved like this before? Keep your eyes and ears wide open. If he's really trying to get next to her, you need to have a serious chat with him. I find it creepy that he would even shine a light up her stairs, especially knowing that she has a husband.

Answer 5

Well i would think that he had some type of feeling about her I mean think about it, who calls someone at work alot, and do all the other stuff hes doing if he obivously didnt, but you have the right idea, go sit down and have a talk with him, and tell him to chill out with the calls, in a min it would be stalking

Answer 6

The key to relationships is open communication. If the communication falters, then so will the relationship. You need to sit down with him and talk to him. Tell him what is bothering you, bothering the other person, and so on. You need to work together to alleviate the situation. If he is a good guy, he will respect you, if not, then you have other issues that may need to be address, counseling, etc, and if that doesn't work, then the relationship is doomed. Good luck
=)

Answer 7

I think I would verify what she is saying is true.

What if she has the crush on him, but because he will not give it up, she is throwing a little fit and trying to ruin his marriage?

Get the details. Ask for her call logs, etc. If she won't give them up and he denies it, and she will not provide the proof, you have to go with your husband over the tenant.

Answer 8

First I would ask her how he knows her cell phone #. Then ask what "unimportant" things is he asking about. I would want to know more specifics from her. Then I would approach him with the info she provides. You should be able to tell if your mate is being honest with you.....or if it's HER.
She should be making it perfectly clear to HIM, that she will not accept his phone calls. If he needs something, that he should call HER husband. That should put an end to both yours and her hysteria.

Answer 9

It sounds like hes acting as though he were a teenager with a crush. Tell him that its very rude to make this woman feel uncomfortable and demand he apologise. Inform him that you will handle any future communication with the tenant, and assure her he wont be calling again

Answer 10

That is weird!! I would be upset...be prepared for him to deny everything and say that she is crazy!! He probably has a bit of a crush on her, but is crossing the line by calling her. You definitely need to talk to him and find out what the deal is... then you need to set some guide lines about his behavior...
Stay strong, at least you know she is not interested and is concerned about it!!
Hopefully her husband doesn't sue, or leave in the middle of the night!!!