For most of my 55 years, I have thought of myself as more straight than bi. But, recently I have come to the realization that I am totally gay. Now all I do is fantasize gay sex. I haven’t had sex with my wife in months, yet I still consider her my best friend. What do I do now?
2007-03-13 07:12:26 · 15 answers · asked by EasyRider 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Thanks for the sincere suggestions. It's nice to know that you are all such a caring group. Not sure what I will do next, but I have never had sex with anyone outside the marriage and, hopefully, never will.
2007-03-13 14:17:13 · update #1
It's your choice to make, you know you situation more intimately than i do and you know your wife (and kids if you have any) more than anyone here. if you chose your relationship with this woman as it is now as the most important thing in your life then i would advise not to tell her and try to avoid cheating on her.
however, if she is the most important person i your life and you love her, i say you absolutely must tell her (and keep your suitcase packed just in case...). approach the matter delicately and do it in the most serious and heartfelt manner you can. its better it comes from your mouth than she finding out by chance.
be prepared for the worst, she could leave you and if you have kids, they might not be supportive.
2007-03-13 08:08:39 · answer #1 · answered by puzzlite 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel.
If you have been together for a long time and are very close, I'm sure she will listen. Talk this out with her and hope she understands. Let her know that you still love her.
This doesn't necessarily have to mean the end of your relationship. There are several options - possibly an open relationship, threesomes, if you really love each other you can work through this to ether.
2007-03-13 19:22:54 · answer #2 · answered by Jeannie C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to have a one on one talk with her. It probably is also important to know why you have not had sex with her for months. Lastly, you will have to weigh whether the feelings you now have are worth sacrificing your relationship with her, your family, peers etc. There are relationships that can still work out where you can have a relationship with your spouse but sexual release with a partner. Those are rare but it depends on how your wife handles it when you talk to her.
2007-03-13 14:52:17 · answer #3 · answered by Brent W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does your wife know? If not, you need to tell her. There's nothing wrong with who you are, but at the same time, its not fair to keep her in the dark either. You need to have a"sit down" with your wife. Lay it all on the table. If this is truly the way you feel, then there's no going back now anyway. Be honest with her. Things will really go to hell if you dont.
2007-03-13 15:13:03 · answer #4 · answered by pure&simple 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummm... you should definitely find a way to have this conversation with your wife where you tell her that you are gay. Then she might want a divorce and you should probably take it. And then, find yourself a partner and live happily ever after and be true to yourself.
2007-03-13 14:28:13 · answer #5 · answered by The One and Only 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
talk to her, maybe yuo can keep a spiritual marrige. But this is an issue that should be orked out inside the marrige
2007-03-13 14:17:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
have you been seeing a guy? if so i would tell your wife and explain that you still love her as your best friend but you have found a man that fulfills you completly now
2007-03-13 14:18:08 · answer #7 · answered by alex m 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
U Hit the gym go to spa and get waxed and GO TO GAY CLUB AND ENJOY!!!
2007-03-13 16:53:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you just proved its not a birth thing its your feelings, well youd better feel happy with your choice and live it or get saved and do your best to have a safe and happy relationship with your wife
2007-03-13 14:23:55 · answer #9 · answered by manoman 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Find a counselor.
2007-03-13 14:35:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋