Why would someone feel powerless and try to capture power even if you love him so much and you do not feel any power in a love relationship? Then it means he does not love you? Why does he constantly say "I feel I have no power." constantly and "Fight for your independence later on." even when I do not fight for independence and I get together with him everyday, I talk to him on the phone almost every hour. But I have a job and I cannot be on the phone this frequent. When I say this, he freaks out and he says I am afraid of losing you. Nothing is enough for him, what am I supposed to do in this case? What is this independence and power issues? I think all of us are independent because we are individuals. Only we can do is to control ourselves and to accept we cannot control others. Why does my guy try to control me?
2007-03-13 06:36:09 · 5 answers · asked by joe b 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Because you are letting him. Figure out why you let him and then maybe you will stop. Then of course he will stop. That might mean you have to break it off with him. Just remember this. You cannot do anything to change or control a person. You can only change yourself and control how you react to the other person. Have a great day.
2007-03-13 06:41:06 · answer #1 · answered by redflite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to establish the ground rules by telling him straight up you cannot be on the phone all day. It sounds like he is dependant rather than independant and he surely is insecure. You need to address that issue if you ever want the relationship to go any where or things will get really nasty later on. It sounds like he is doing more to lose you by all the excessive contact and you may have to tell him that.
2007-03-13 14:57:49 · answer #2 · answered by Brent W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds kinda needy. Does he have a job? If he doesn't and he depends on you for support, it might be causing his "power" issues. Tell him to get a hobby, something that keeps him busy and not thinking about whether or not you are going to leave him 24-7. Your feelings are understandable, if you cannot make him understand that your job requires your attention and that this doesn't mean that you love him any less, then it might be time to move on.
2007-03-13 13:49:14 · answer #3 · answered by The One and Only 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine tries to control me too, he says hes not, but i feel like he is. When i try to talk to him, he tries to say im trying to change him. Your boyfriend is very insecure. I know mine is, hes constantly on me bout getting flirted with at work, and constantly trying to dent it in my head to wear granny ****. It doesnt work tho.. Haha. Him calling you at work and stuff is gonna get you fired. If I were you id have a serious talk with him and tell him that the way hes going he will wind up losing you if you cant pay your bills. I myself wished i knew where all the good guys are at.
2007-03-13 13:49:24 · answer #4 · answered by grumpyme2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let him control you. If he can't accept that then he DESERVES to lose you.
2007-03-13 14:06:35 · answer #5 · answered by helehelo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋