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my mom and dad have been agrguing alot lately and i understand and know married couples do that, but i mean to an exstent no, because my family and i live here in oklahoma, and my grandmother lives in colorado and well she's struggling to pay for bills and things like that and the problem is she could be homeless soon so my mother wants he to move in with us for a coulpe of months and me dad said no, and my mom is kinda sick now because of that because, if it would have been my other grandmother my dad would have said yes with a heart beat, so now i think my mom wants to divorce him, because she says she hates him and things like that now. what should i or could i do because this is ripping my family apart.!!!!!!!

2007-03-13 04:55:32 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

13 answers

I know first hand that divorce is not only hard on the couple, but the children. I am not saying your parents will divorce, because when people are mad they do and say things they don't mean. So let's not jump to conclusions. IF they do end up divorcing though, I want you to know you are not alone. My parents are divorced, my Mother walked out on me and my 3 other sisters when I was 12, and left me with a mentally disturbed Dad. If anything happens between your parents, remember, you have NOTHING to do with it, it is not your fault at all, and there is also nothing you can do about it. Write me an e-mail sometime if you want to talk more starsnstripes90@aol.com good luck hun!

2007-03-13 05:05:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Ask your parents for a conversation with both of them and tell them what this is doing to you. Ask them to stop being so selfish and think of what is in the best interest of the family as a whole unit - that includes Grandparents. As a headsup kiddo - "the in-laws" is a huge complex ordeal with alot of couples. There may be reasons for your Fathers hesitency - explain to him that he needs to think of how this affects his wife and makes her feel - after all it's her MOTHER & more importantly how it is making you feel - it's your GrandMother. You must also talk with your Mother and let her know that negative comments about your Father hurt you & that maybe she needs to have him explain to her the reasons behind his adversity to this - maybe because it is her Mother, she is not willing to see things from his perspective. Either way - get them otgether for a family meeting and explain to them that communication - not fighting & respect will help your family work through your problems - no matter how big. If your parents divorce - understand that it is NOT YOU - sometimes the issues are too large and there are people who are better off living in a sperate situation where the respect and communication come back into focus. Also like the other guy said - prayer can NEVER hurt!

2007-03-13 05:07:01 · answer #2 · answered by martiek7 3 · 0 0

People say a lot of things they don't mean when they are arguing and the biggest causes of arguements in a marriage are about MONEY and other family members. All marriages go through some times of trouble. I have seen myself a lot with my own parents marriage to a point where my mom even left my dad for a couple weeks. Some marriages just need time to adjust and change to a new problem. I am guessing your grandmother is your mom's mom and if that is the case then yeah your dad might have some trouble with the idea of her moving in since that is his mother-in-law and he might be scared of the change that could bring. Ask your parents to sit down with you and to listen to you and how you feel about their arguing and about what is going on with your grandmother. You are a FAMILY and your parents should want to hear how this arguing is affecting you. I hope this helps. Good luck!!!

2007-03-13 05:05:45 · answer #3 · answered by charlene8301@sbcglobal.net 1 · 0 0

Try not to make your parents' problem your problem. That will help you the most.

People in relationships run into stressful situations and some argue a lot as a result. That doesn't mean they will necessarily divorce.

Your parents both have to be realistic. It may not make sense for your grandmother to move in, but maybe there are other ways they could help her.

If you can get them to a disinterested third party to help them sort through their situation, like a psychologist or counselor that would be helping THEM the most.

Staying out of the situation and supporting each of your parents will be the best way for you to help YOURSELF.

2007-03-13 05:06:43 · answer #4 · answered by Jason 3 · 0 0

ought to circulate the two way, relies upon on the reason in the back of the divorce and how badly the youngster become affected: a million - a divorce would be plenty extra probably using fact the youngster has no longer witnessed completely the sanctity of marriage and hence ought to be certain to renounce whilst issues get difficult 2 - a divorce would be much less probably using fact the youngster knows first-hand the tough time his mothers and dads (and he) had as an instantaneous effect of the divorce, and would not choose to adventure that (or for his babies to adventure that) hence he may well be extra vulnerable to do despite the fact that it took to make the marriage artwork. Have i in my opinion replied your question right here or only stated the easy obtrusive? Apologies in case you experience I certainly have!

2016-11-25 00:30:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

The problem you face is not one for any Grand child to make a decision about. You should feel the love of you mother, father, and grandparents. If you do, what ever happens will be right.

The reasons that cause the family riff you are seeing, are numerous. It is not good for you to seek why things are the way they are. Better is the growing of love between you and everyone in the family. Stick to this goal and all will work out well.

2007-03-13 05:04:44 · answer #6 · answered by whatevit 5 · 0 0

I really doubt that your mom is going to divorce your dad over this. Obviously your dad does not feel as close to your mom's mom than his own mother. That is only right. I wonder if your mom would allow his mom to move in. I bet not. So they are equally selfish.
This is an adult solution and you really have no say. However you are learning what to value by what they do. (Tell them that, and maybe they will start acting more civil) I wonder if granny even wants to come live with you all.

2007-03-13 05:04:29 · answer #7 · answered by lily 6 · 0 0

I'm so sorry that your in the middle of all of this.But them arguing all the time doesn't always mean that their going to get a divorce.They may eventually sort out their differences,but until then,just get on with your own life and try not to let this make you too unhappy.Concentrate on your school work and Friends more,as this will help take your mind off their issues.When they have sorted out their problems everything may be OK,but if not if they do decide to separate then it must be for the best.They may get on better as friends than they do now.which would make all of you much happier.so don't you worry too much things always sort themselves out for the best.Though it might not look that way right now.GOOD LUCK AND BE HAPPY.

2007-03-13 05:12:58 · answer #8 · answered by patsy 3 · 0 0

i'm sorry but there isnt much that you can do. your parents will do what is necessary for them and their marriage. if they feel that they aren't working well together anymore then that may be best for everyone, including you, because they wont be fighting anymore and you don't need to be in middle of it. some parents get along a lot better when they aren't together anymore. i'm sorry that you are going through this... my parent s divorced when I was 14. I know it's tough but hopefully they'll work through this. But remember one fight doesn't necessarily mean that they will get divorced. if you are really worried about it you can talk to them. hopefully they will be completely honest with you. best of luck.

2007-03-13 05:34:48 · answer #9 · answered by jessicamichelle 5 · 0 0

There's not really much you can do to make your parents love each other. I would talk to your parents about it one on one with both of them. But in reality, there's nothing you can do to make your parents agree.

2007-03-13 05:05:32 · answer #10 · answered by Allison 3 · 0 0

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