When I was a child my next-door neighbour used to behave inappropriately with me. He was a man in his 30s but he would always ask me round. At first he would get me to wash his car or do cleaning for him while he took a shower. Then he would ask me to pass him his towel when he was naked. After a while this progressed and he would touch me but not badly (he would pretend he needed to "measure" me for jeans he was buying me and asked me to get undressed while he did so) Also he would ask me to massage him, or "click his back" and stuff like that. Looking back I think he was definitely some kind of pervert.
I have never told anyone about this but I worry that his behaviour has got worse and he may have abused other children. Especially now the internet is so widely used.
Should I report his behaviour to the police or is it not worth dragging it all up?
2007-03-13 04:23:19 · 22 answers · asked by Rosie 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
My mother did get worried when she realised I had been there and asked me if anything had happened but I denied it as I didn't want to worry/upset her.
2007-03-13 04:30:40 · update #1
This was 13-15 years ago
2007-03-13 05:27:38 · update #2
if you think he might be doing this to other kids i think you should do something about it ,but that will mean a lot of past history coming up for you. good luck with whatever you decide to do
2007-03-13 04:27:41 · answer #1 · answered by san_ann68 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm not surprised you didn't tell anybody, and it's not your fault for not doing so, you were just a child. And your mother's not to blame either. Just think, years ago, that sort of thing wasn't spoken about - any kind of abuse was all hush hush, and if you did tell you were seen as a liar.
It's not too late to report him. You don't know how many other children he may have hurt, if he is a paedophile. Not only that, if you report him, it may give other people confidence to come forward too. Even if you are wrong, and he meant nothing wrong and had good intentions, it's better to be safe and sorry that you made a mistake, rather than sorry because he's able to carry on doing this. But after reading what you said, it just sounds awful - made my skin crawl to think of him doing that. There's no doubt something wrong with him.
Do what you feel is right. Listen to your heart and your instincts because they're usually right
2007-03-13 11:52:11 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely report him. He may still be doing it.
Other people may have reported him and your evidence may be just enough for the police to arrest him. It doesn't matter how long ago it was the police will take you seriously.
This sort of evidence often doesn't come to light for years as people don't want to report it or think there is no point.
I used to work in a unit for disabled children. Everything had to be documented, who went where at what time, bruises, cuts, grazes on the kids, everything. The documents have to be stored for 75 years. That's how far back an investigation can go if one of the kids made an allegation in later years.
So in terms of timescale, it is definitely not too late to report this.
2007-03-13 12:00:01 · answer #3 · answered by Bum Gravy. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He did push the limits, but he did no physical harm to you. Mentally you are in anguish. However, I think you are opening a can of worms that is going to be very upsetting to yourself. Rest assured, if he has progressed in his behaviour, by now he might even be behind bars.
Forgive yourself for allowing this behaviour and get on with your life. This is an episode you cannot change and you will receive no reward from taking revenge now after all these years.
2007-03-13 16:12:33 · answer #4 · answered by MaggieSA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor soul, do you want to drag it all up again and have to go through courts etc? But what if he is still doing it? Awful dilemma i reckon. Maybe do a bit of digging to see if he is still around kids, if so report him(I know that digging around isnt that simple). He may of just had fixation with you and never done it again in which case even though he deserves it you don't need the stress of re-living it in court for the next 14 months or so. My thoughts are with you.
2007-03-13 15:13:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is worth it. I'm 25 now and when through a simular stage with a neighbour when I was 6. I've now reported it to the police and I'm awaiting the outcome.
If nothing happens, then at least I know that I told someone and his history and situation now was at least looked over.
2007-03-13 11:29:05 · answer #6 · answered by princess.lissa 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
what hapened with you was very wrong.it should not happen to anyone.you know bout it,so stop it.he should be stoped at all costs.no one would ever behave in such a way.dont go to the police.contact some counseller first.it should be able to help you to take the next step.just remember,slow and steady wins the race.
2007-03-13 11:46:29 · answer #7 · answered by me me me!!! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you reallt should go and mention it to the police, they may have had other complaints. A mention to your parents as well might be a good idea, i have a daughter and if she came home on eday and told me that I would gut the bastard, and in no way blame her or think any less of her, so don't worry about that. I think you have real courage to think about other peoples safety like this, and you must do something about it. xxx
2007-03-13 11:29:19 · answer #8 · answered by CHARISMA 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is typical paedophile behaviour and if you know were he is i would report him to the police.. .Hopefully he will be at least put on the sex offenders register so that they can keep an eye on him.Good luck,its no an easy thing to do but you are wrong thinking it wasn't abuse ...it was!
2007-03-13 11:32:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Inform your parents. Stop going there. Even after that if it continues inform the police.
2007-03-13 11:39:48 · answer #10 · answered by drsuria_cbe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes! GO TO POLICE RIGHT AWAY! THIS MAN IS A POTENTIAL RAPIST AND NEEDS TO BE STOPPED! sadly, there are a lot of females like you who are going through the same thing! now is your chance to get this pervert to answer to authorities and get him off the streets before he has chance to do something terrible, and ruin yours, or someones elses life! go to police now! if you ever watch law and order SVU! IT IS REALISTIC SHOW! these kinds of men are out there and need to be put away!
2007-03-13 11:29:30 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋