I am supposed to get married in August to a man that lives 3 hours away. We have been together for over a year. He owns his own business and do not have health insurance and I was young when I had my kids and gave custody to my parents. Well I have been with them for 5 years now but I have been unable to work due to taking care of 4 kids and my grandma who is now in a nursing home. My parents are against us getting married cause of the fact of no insurance and feel like he needs to get a full time job with benifits but he can't do that and own his own company. I want nothing more that my parents to support me on this. I am 30 now and take good care of my kids. My parents say there is no way we can get married in August. They know I am not gonna leave my boys here so if they do not give custody then I can't do it. I need to move down there and get a job but I don't want to leave me kids. How can I get them to see that I love him and want to be with him and that we all will do just fine
2007-03-13 03:28:37 · 6 answers · asked by Sarah G 3 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
First of all you have to recognize that you have one responsiblity and it comes before your happiness and your love life...and that responsibility is to provide for and take care of your children, and this day and age that requires health insurance.
So, there it is...that's #1...how do you take care of your kids and provide them health insurance. NO OTHER issue is as important as that.
I suggest you tell your boyfriend that you can only marry him if he can provide health insurance. Even those that own their own businesses can provide health insurance. It may cost him quite a bit of money, and he will have to provide it to all his employees (if there are others), but that's part of being a responsible business owner. If he can't or won't do that, then he isn't a good provider...NEXT.
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2007-03-13 03:36:14 · answer #1 · answered by non_apologetic_american 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have to wonder about a 30 year old woman that has 4 children whom her parents have custody of and wants to get married.
It sounds to me as if there is more to this story than you are saying here. Perhaps you need to listen to your parents.
On the other hand, if your parents only objection is that he doesn't have health insurance, he should check with the state that you are living in about getting group rates for small businesses. The expenses are shared so that they are not so exorbitant.
If after he gets insurance and your parents still stall about giving you custody of your children they you know that that was not the real reason why they are objecting but have selfish motives. In that case, you might want to see a lawyer. Unless you have done some very horrendous things and are an unfit mother, most judges would rather see children with their biological parents.
2007-03-13 03:49:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's time you take personal responsibility for your children. File a petition for legal custody of your kids.
Get married and move with the children to a new place. Find a job with health benefits. Grant visitation rights to your parents.
2007-03-13 03:38:09 · answer #3 · answered by ne11 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to put your kid's best interest first. If you've been a flakey mom, in and out of their life, then your parents have the right to be concerned about you taking them from their stability. If the parents just want your babies because they are overly involved and pushy, then get married and behave like an adult - purchase health insurance. Kids cost money. 4 kids cost even more money, but you made them, you need to step up to the plate and take care of them properly.
Me personally, no man comes before my children. Think of this from your kid's perspective, no one else's.
2007-03-13 03:37:24 · answer #4 · answered by Just Mee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your parents' insistence is not about insurance. He can get insurance. This is a control issue. They're probably used to controlling your life, because you gave them that power at a time when you couldn't control life yourself. Well, you're not a reckless teenager anymore, so it's high time you cut the cord. If you really want your kids back, you should talk to a lawyer. You're the biological mother and have been the caretaker of your kids for 5 years, so unless your parents can demonstrate you're incapable of raising kids and conducting your own affairs, you can probably regain custody. They'll fight you tooth and nail, though, so gird your loins and get ready for battle...
2007-03-13 03:48:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Listen to your parents on this one or you will regret it! This guy doesn't have much of a business if he can't provide health insurance for employee's or your potential family! Dump him find a better provider try to find income yourself!
2007-03-13 03:39:53 · answer #6 · answered by bulabate 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋