You capture my heart
When I just hear you laugh
And though we are young
You're my missing half
When you're playing with children
And showing them love
You make my heart beat
Like your sent from above
You capture my heart
With your captivating beauty
And inspire me to make
Caring for you my duty
When you're walking, you move
With such style and grace
And I could study all day
Every line of your face
I'll search high and low
Until each other we find
But now for today
You exist in my mind
When we are apart
It's you I will miss
And long once again
To taste your sweet kiss
I'll embrace you so close
Each night and each day
But for now I will search
Till I find you .................Someday
I would like to chat on yahoo IM with any girl who likes my poem (or add me to your buddy list)
2007-03-13 02:55:24 · 24 answers · asked by dwsum41@yahoo.com 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
they wont
2007-03-13 02:58:16 · answer #1 · answered by conan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not THAT bad (just that the rhyme is missing n gets cheeky in the middle)...but i really dont think its the place to show it off n those last lines about the girls sucked.
2007-03-13 10:01:39 · answer #2 · answered by clairvoyance 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a pretty good poem but I'm not looking to chat with anyone.
2007-03-13 10:12:25 · answer #3 · answered by ♪ ♫Jin_Jur♫ ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The concept is nice but some of the wording is misplaced. Try again buddy!
2007-03-13 10:01:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm a chic and it's cool.
Reading stuff like that to a girl will get you some. If your old enough ;-).
Women like to emotionally connect and sounds like your on the right track.
2007-03-13 10:00:40 · answer #5 · answered by Babydoll 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You asked the wrong f*cking person to give an opinion about your 'poem'. I am a writer and I've spent decades doing so, and that, my dear, was a piece of shitt!
2007-03-13 10:01:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
That was the sweetest thing I've ever heard!! Good for you...I'd chat with you but I'm a bit old!!
2007-03-13 10:01:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I thought it was sweet. I am happily married so I can't chat, but I hope you find someone just for you! Good luck.
2007-03-13 10:00:24 · answer #8 · answered by Tracie 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It's sweet... you should join http://www.editred.com
It's a fun writing community where you can get feedback on your work and give feedback to other writers.
2007-03-13 10:00:31 · answer #9 · answered by Gen•X•er (I love zombies!) 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's very beautiful. Hope you wrote it for you girlfriend.
2007-03-13 09:59:15 · answer #10 · answered by DreamGirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
thats sweet, sorry i have a boyfriend though
2007-03-13 09:58:49 · answer #11 · answered by neverland22 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋