hi i had a miscarriage on sunday went for a scan on monday and they told me i was wondering have you ever had a miscarriage and how did you cope ? im only 18 ,(19 in 2week) i was nearly 7 week gone i cant eat it knocks me sick, i tried something to eat on monday but that night i threw it up i didn,t have morning sickness when i was pregnant and i had bad dreams aswell last night about the scan and i just feel crap i just want to forget about it but i cant it still hurts i feel as if it was my fault but it wasnt, how long again can i start trying for another baby
thank you for your help
2007-03-12 23:21:20 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I can only imagine that it hurts and with time the pain will ease. You are very young make sure this is what you really want. Ababy changes your life forever. Take care and look after yourself. (I do believe when a baby miscarries it is for a medical reason)
2007-03-12 23:24:59 · answer #1 · answered by hottee 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Look after yourself sweetie. It won't just magically go away. When i miscarried a cried for about 2 weeks non stop and then on and off for about a month. It eases with time but that's all you can give it. We're you offered any counselling? It can help. It sounds like the sickness thing is psychological because it's constantly on your mind. Maybe talking about it will help. You can start trying for a baby as soon as you feel ready but I'd give it at least a few months just so your body and hormones can get beck to normal first. If only because you don't why you lost the baby in the first place. It does get better honey. I was only a few months older than you when i had a miscarriage. I'm now 29 with 2 kids and realise that actually what happened did happen for the best even though it soooo didn't feel like that at the time. Take care of yourself. Let your body and mind rest. Things will work out.
2007-03-12 23:41:24 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was pregnant with twins, and I miscarried one when I was 3 months pregnant. My son is nearly 3 now, but I still haven't gotten over losing his brother/sister. It never goes away, no matter how far you were into the pregnancy. That baby was a part of you, so it's like a part of you dies too. Obviously I coped better because I still had my son, but I'll never forget the one I lost, never stop thinking & wondering about him/her.
You'll nerver forget about it, and the hurt won't really ever leave you.
You should wait, let it sink in and that'll take a while. Also your body needs time t readjust. The best time to try again would be at least a year I think. All my love to you x
2007-03-13 02:45:31 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a miscarriage 13 weeks on and had to have the baby removed in surgery.
As soon as I got home life started going a bit weird I felt a bit spaced out and music that I had heard whilst being pregnant made me very emotional. I had very bad nightmares but after a day or two I decided to get back to life I started meeting up with friends and I had a very supportive partner....who was also deeeply saddened by it.
Life started slowly to get back to normal but I still think about it.
The hospital told us we could start trying again after about 6 months...but we decided to live a little longer child free two years later we had our son and then three years after that our daughter.
I was 24 when I had my son and was totaly unprepared for what motherhood was all about and felt too young.My son was extremely hyperactive...even as a newborn baby!!!only by carefully prepared meals and structure can we live a resonable life.
What I mean to say is before having another child don't you want to live a little? I travelled the world and met and did some amazing things before I decided to start a family...If I had done this at 18-19 my experiance on life would have been limited.
I am so sorry that this has happened to you and I hope that you just take some time out...to get your head around what has happened to you.
Take care
2007-03-12 23:41:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all I'm sorry for your lost, And do not go blaming yourself as it was not your fault in fact there is nothing anyone can do to avoid or stop miscarriage. I know how you feel i had one about a year ago,So i know ho you feel right, your not sure how to blame what to do or say your just numb.
I believe that everything happens for a reason, I know it may seem cheesy but its true god doesn't closed a door without opening another. I guess it was your body telling you that its not ready for a baby just yet.
All i can say to you now is just relax and focus on getting over this horrible event, all you can do know is rebuild and refocus, and then when it feels right try again, but don't be afraid not to try again, because it won't happen every time.
Good luck in your future, i wish you the ever happier you deserve. and be brave and don't be afraid to talk to people everyone needs a shoulder to cry ever once and a while.
2007-03-12 23:30:16 · answer #5 · answered by Lynda27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I send my thoughts out to you right now. I similarly found out I was pregnant but a few days later bled and it was all over. Although I wasnt as far gone as you, it hurt a lot emotionaly, especially as people tried to tell me just think of it as a late period.
It is very hard to get over such a loss, and it wont happen over night. Confide in those close to you, cry and spend as much time as you need to greive. I wrote a poem about my baby which helped a lot. Try the website the miscarriage association - which gives you lots of help & advice & support & contacts if you need to talk to somebody. You must never believe it was your fault though - for this is one thing it was not. Unfortunately there is sometimes no explanation why miscarriage happens but you have to stay strong, the majority of women go on to have a successfull pregnancy the next time around. Take care of yourself x
2007-03-13 01:32:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it time hun, you're not gonna feel brilliant overnight. There will never be a time when you don't think about the little one that could have been. Just take one step at a time, each day as it comes, and you'll find things will start to get easier. A miscarriage is just like someone you love dying so just give yourself the time and space to grieve. It's not your fault, so don't blame yourself, sometimes these things just happen for no reason. Take a while before trying for another baby otherwise it'll just seem like your trying to replace the baby you lost. Good luck xxx
2007-03-12 23:26:26 · answer #7 · answered by hayleynichols88 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage, but didn't even know I was pregnant (they called it a "missed pregnancy" whatever that means). I had been trying for ages and was absolutely heart broken when I found out. The only advice I can give is to get very very drunk and have a good cry - it worked for me and got it out of my system. I tried again almost immediately after and I now have a happy and healthy and beautiful 3 year old daughter. This happened within about 2 months of my miscarriage.
The way to look at it, and the way the doctor said it to me, was that the original baby was never meant to be - perhaps would have been too poorly if he/she was born.
Try again when you are ready and very best of luck to you.
2007-03-12 23:26:39 · answer #8 · answered by Rachael H 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i had a miscarriage when i was 20, 2 years ago and if im being honest - i didnt cope at all.
i always had the opinion that it was so tiny and it was never really there so how could losing it hurt, then it happened to me and i took it really badly.
first thing you need to realise is it was not your fault and that was the biggest part of my problem, i blamed myself, till you stop thinking that way you wont get past it. in the end i got a tattoo on my upper thigh for my baby - the chinese symbol for angel, my due date underneath and 3 stars above it, one yellow, one pink and one blue as i didnt know the sex.
you wont ever orget about it and even 2 years on it still comes into my mind everyday and it still hurts, but it will fade i promise.
i would say as soon as you have a normal period it would be safe to try again. some people conceive immediately, it took me 18 months so just keep trying it will happen.
good luck xxx
2007-03-13 00:52:38 · answer #9 · answered by Şơƥɦɨȩ'ȿ ♡Μυɱ˗Μυɱ♡ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry to hear about your distress. I miscarried at a similar time when I was 20. My attitude then shocks me now. I just thought, oh well then late period. Nowadays I would be very upset too. You have to allow yourself to feel upset. Don't punish yourself twice over. As for trying again, only you will know when/ if you are ready.
No shame in going back to your GP and explaining how upset you are. They may be able to help.
I know it doesn't help but it is true that many women do have a 'test run' pregnancy before they conceive for the first time. The pregnancy probably would not have continued regardless of anything you did or didn't do. Please, please do not blame yourself.
You will have your baby.
Take care x
2007-03-14 06:54:03 · answer #10 · answered by crabbit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had 2 miscarriages. I know how much is hurts and how you blame your self for losing the baby. But I now understand that Its wasn't my fault.
The baby miscarries because it wasn't developing right or your body is not ready for full pregnancy.
I am now 30 weeks pregnant and I know I wont forget my miscarriages but you have to remember not to blame yourself.
Try again when you feel confident to do so.
Good luck!!
2007-03-13 01:27:59 · answer #11 · answered by louise s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋