my gf's of 2 years is pregnant shes 16 and im 17 her parents keep pushing abortion on us and neither one of us want to have one its against our morals and ive never done anything in my life and not manned up to it and taken responsibility...i dropped out and am working on getting my GED as well as working a full time job and serching for another part time job we have told them that abortion is not even thinkable as an option as neither is adoption bcuz if i ever seen the baby i wouldnt be able to let it go as neither would she..........will her parents ever get used to/ accept the fact that me and their daughter whom i love and care for very much are going to have a baby?
2007-03-12 23:15:47 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
This is hard for them I'm sure. You are both so young. First of all let me say that That you should be commended for stepping up to the plate. Its too late to tell you that you should have been more careful. The damage is done.
You have a rough road ahead of you. Although I do not like the idea that you dropped out of school, I do give you credit for getting a full time job. That is way more then most 17 yr old boys would do. I think you need credit for standing by her, and not leaving her to deal with it alone.
I personally could never have an abortion or advise anyone to do so. I think in time her parents will come around. I know as a parents I could not live with the fact that I had my daughter abort my grand baby. I think in time it will be OK. Its just hard for them to accept I'm sure. They see it as her throwing away her future.
Please get your GED , try to at least take some college classes, You can get grants that will help pay for it. That way you wont have to live of minimum wage forever. Remember a baby is forever, So no matter what happens with you and your girlfriend in the future, the baby still has to be top priority.
2007-03-12 23:36:19 · answer #1 · answered by tammer 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Where are your parents in this? If you are estranged from your parents and a high-school drop-out, it looks pretty bad even if you are working and trying to get your GED. A GED is a minimum in today's world. Her parents are disappointed in her and in you and they don't think there's much of a future for you two, let alone you three!
That said, I can understand your moral dilemma. Lots of people talk about how the right to abort shouldn't be taken away but usually they think they are giving their support for the right of other people to abort. Everyone thinks that if they have a baby on the way, they want to keep that baby on the way because it is their precious baby that's on the way - someone who resembles them, has the genes of their ancestors and deserves the right to live.
We live in that kind of society. Go figure.
If neither of you want to have an abortion, shut up about the morals part for awhile - you are the ones who were having sex, no doubt knowing your parents would think THAT is a bad idea and I have yet to hear those morals (have sex because you want to) preached in a church. So forget that whole morals argument.
Get married, figure you have to be responsible, don't rely on your parents to foot the bill for your playing house - work your butts off, share childcare responsibilites, be loyal to each other and love each other. Sounds like a lot but it is just the beginning.
Make plans for college (go at night), have career goals, make yourself a better student if you aren't already. Plan on life not being fun with a baby keeping you up some nights (you'll have to take turns getting a good night's sleep), count on babies being expensive.
Rise to the challenge. It's a lot tougher than you imagine. You can do it - you're way too young but if you don't give in to the abortion pressures, it is the way you will have to go. Good luck, you two (or three)!
2007-03-16 12:55:27 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like, even though you both did an irresponsible act, that you are, in general, a responsible young man. Bringing a baby into this world is the easiest part of having a child; raising the baby to be an independent, hardworking, assett to society is the hard part. There are many other options rather than having an abortion. Morally, I think abortion is wrong. It would be another sin on top of the one you have already committed by becoming unwed parents. You can never change the fact that you conceived this child outside of marriage,(and no it won't change the fact if you get married now) , but you can make the best decision from this point forward. God will forgive you for your past decisions if you honestly ask him to, and he will help provide for this new life that you are fathering, if you put your trust in him and do all you and your girlfriend can do to provide for this child. God helps those who help themselves. The decision you make will affect not only yours, but your child's life. Sometimes, what we do for our children's best interest is very hard. Consider adoption if you think you cannot be the best parents for this child. If you feel you CAN be the best parents, the only way you can and will prove this to her parents is to do it. It will take both of you being determined and relentless in your pusuits. They will eventually see that you are hard working and that you love the child and the mother. NO ONE can make your girlfriend have an abortion.. You need to support her physically and mentally through this ordeal. Understand that her parents are "trying" to do what they "think" is best for their baby. Help her to be strong when it comes to saving your (son/daughter's) life. Fight for this child as if it was a living child of yours. After all, it already is.
2007-03-13 09:17:01 · answer #3 · answered by mechelle 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is good to hear that you are taking responsibility for your actions.. Abortion is not right.. Her parents need to get out of your business.. If you and your gf are both prepared for this baby then it is not any of her parents business and the way it sounds.. Your gf could not have found a better man.. At least you are going to take care of your baby which is more then i can say for many other men out there in the world today..
2007-03-13 12:02:00 · answer #4 · answered by cadenjoie321 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't agree with abortion but I feel that your gf parents thinks that both of you might not be mature enough to take care of the baby. You need to convince your gf parents that you have the capability to look after the baby when the baby is being born.
Once you are able to convince them, then I believe you have a better chance to keep the baby and being together with your gf
2007-03-13 06:30:08 · answer #5 · answered by Clown & Joker 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm glad that you decided to man up and take care of your baby togehter. More teen girls need to date guys like you. It'll be hard but you can do it. Just ignore her parents and keep trying to get a job. Make sure she finishes school and don't let her get under a lot of stress if at all possible as it's not good for her or the baby. See if you can find a government housing for teen couples until you save up enough money to get your own place. Good luck.
2007-03-13 12:21:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to a church and see if there are people who are willing to help you out, they should be pretty happy with you guys not wanting an abortion, maybe they will give you help. Consider adoption out of state, I know its hard, but being a parent means doing the most you can do for your child, even if that means letting someone who can take care of it. Go to college, because you will owe it to your child and future ones(if you chose to). Work something out with your parents. Always remember you will always have to do whats right for it.
2007-03-14 19:42:18 · answer #7 · answered by Brendan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bravo to you for taking on responsibility. It sounds like you and your girlfriend know what a hard road you both will face, but you will face it together and with your child. I'm sorry the unborn child's grandparents see the baby as only a problem..and not a life that you both have created. Hang in there..and you know you are doing the right thing.
2007-03-13 07:25:14 · answer #8 · answered by pixie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Abortion is not the answer. The baby is already alive
inside your girlfriend. Ther are programs out there that
help teenagers like you guys. Don't do the abortion. It will
come back to you sooner or later. No one can force her
to commit that crime. Seek help and good luck to both of you.
2007-03-13 08:37:44 · answer #9 · answered by lizzy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I want to say Im proud of you and your gf you 2 seem to have high morals you really need to stick to your guns and keep the baby, I think you will have no prob after the baby is born and they see there grandchild. i will say this though you 2 need to maybe work on getting married
2007-03-13 08:40:11 · answer #10 · answered by sckenpo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋