He wears axe body spray & uses mouthwash all of a sudden & is gone for at least 12 hours if not more & doesn't have a job & claims he is at poker. I don't love him anymore but I'd like to know if you all think he is cheating then I will have an excuse to tell my mom & others why I wanna leave him besides him being verbally abusive to me.
2007-03-12 21:38:26 · 56 answers · asked by Death Girl Am 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
actually, the fact that you don't love him anymore is reason enough to leave him. moreso if he's being verbally abusive to you.
if you still wanna have another reason to leave him, then go out and do a little sleuthing. but what if you find out that he's not lying, will you still tie yourself to this kind of relationship?
i don't understand why you have to explain yourself to others. if you can enter this relationship, you can drop it as well. there's no need for a lame excuse. self-love and self-respect are enough.
God bless!
2007-03-20 21:39:36 · answer #1 · answered by jacquie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need cheating as an excuse to leave this man verbal abuse, gone 12 hours at a time, NOT IN LOVE WITH HIM ANYMORE. However I understand where you are coming from and I would want to know to. These are all signs of that yes a drastic change in someones appearance and habits is always a sign. If you are married getting visible proof will really help you in the court case to make sure you don't walk away with nothing. Either way though leave get out what are you waiting for every minute you are wasting time to heal, go back out, have fun, and find the one true love that you will be in love with.
2007-03-13 23:43:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am, you are looking for a justifiable reason to leave him, and you gave one when you asked the question. Verbal abuse is just as hurtful as any other. Physical is painful, I am not saying it is, but words hurt the soul.
His wearing new body sprays and using mouthwash is a couple of signs that he maybe seeing someone else. There's a reason for the change, and him being gone for 12 hours playing cards, is a worry to me too, and it should be to you. If he's playing for money, where's he getting it since he's not working. Sounds like your husband has a lot going on, and you aren't included but for getting the verbal abuse when things aren't going like he wants.
Honey, I have a daughter and if she was this miserable, there would be no way I would want her to stay. I don't like divorce, but sometimes it's the only answer. If he won't listen and answer some simple questions, then honey, there's nothing left for you to do. You don't love him, you said it yourself, protect yourself, make your plans, and go. Don't live in a misery the rest of your life, you deserve so so much more.
I wish you well, and I pray that you can find the strength and courage to do what is right for you!
God bless us all......................
2007-03-13 02:17:22 · answer #3 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a real winner .... why do you have to have an excuse to tell your mom and others why you want to leave him ---- if he's not making you happy and he's abusive and has no job and doesn't treasure you that's all you need to know but yes changes in a guy's appearance -- suddenly wearing cologne and concern with his hygiene and looks and unusual lengthy periods of time away are all indicative of a cheater. If you want proof, all you have to do is call the poker place or drop by and see if he's there ---- a friend of mine's husband was indeed spending his time at the "poker" place but it wasn't playing poker --- he was playing the bartender there. Good luck.
2007-03-12 21:52:17 · answer #4 · answered by GrnEyedBlondeSwede 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what it sounds like, these are things he doesn't do when he's around you. It's usually not difficult to tell when a guy's lying. That fact that he's being verbally abusive to you is reason enough for you to get out of that relationship, whether he is cheating on you or not. You don't need to put up with that. If he's this way now, imagine if you should marry the guy? Forget it! Get out now! P.S. If nothing else, and he is being honest, he definitely has a gambling problem. 12 hours? C'mon!
2007-03-17 21:56:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if he just now starting to have good personal hygiene, then that is a bit a clue and a problem. You should always have good hygiene!! But on a serious note, verbal abuse can feel like a slap in the face, its no different than physical. With words, you can at least try to take them back, with physical, the bruises take time to heal.
Also, you dont need to prove to any one that he is abusive, gone for 12 hours, and etc. If you want to leave him ,then do it! Screw what everyone else thinks! It's your decision to make who you want to be with!!
2007-03-20 18:42:03 · answer #6 · answered by Vanes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the verbal abuse is enough to leave on. You can do bad by yourself no need to take crap from a man that apparently don't want to be with you. Why change the way u dress and smell if you are just going to play poker? Maybe he is playing poker but who is at this poker game that he is doing all this for? to me there is no need to ask this question i think u already know the answer,but if he not cheating he is planning on it.
2007-03-19 12:17:33 · answer #7 · answered by Tweety 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, he is out playing poker for 12 hours at a time instead of looking for a job, that's reason number one. He is verbally abusive to you, that is reason enough in its self. Stop worrying about whether or not he is cheating and just get out. Don't worry about other people think and do what is right for you. Don't waste your life. If you think it is over then move on and repair yourself. Prince charming is out there waiting.
2007-03-19 04:52:24 · answer #8 · answered by watching-OK 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey don't worry about what others think you should do. If you are unhappy, don't stay in this relationship to satisfy others, you deserve so much more. I'm not sure if he's cheating but I know he is trying to get attention from other women, and once that starts happening you can bet your last dollar, that he's very close to cheating, on you if he already hasn't. No one deserves to be MENTALLY, PHYSICALLY OR VERBALLY abused, and that goes for you to. Being in a relationship like this lowers yourself esteem, and you start to feel stuck and think that you'll never get out of this situation, you start to feel that you don't deserve love, you feel alone, and extremely unhappy, and you want to kill them, at least i did, i thought about many different ways to do it. What kept me sane, was the thought of going to prison, and not being home with my son. Don't let this man push you to that point of no return, get out now, while your still young. Life is what you make it, don't sit there unhappy, get out and enjoy life, and meet you a man that will love you unconditionally, and show that jerk that you don't need him, I guarantee when you leave him, he's gonna come begging you to come back.
2007-03-20 04:51:37 · answer #9 · answered by sweetstlouis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should move on, if he gone for 12 hours, and isn't working doesn't sound like he is playing poker to me. Besides if he is being verbally abusive to you, that is not respectful or fair to you in any way. Good Luck
2007-03-19 07:53:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋