do u like these poems?

Question

Losing Life

Distant sounds you cannot hear to drown
depressed crust of lips slip lies you borrow
mountains melt too with terror of truth
but illusions stay to block tomorrow
from rising up to be one, to hallow
So sorrow grows and your flesh follows
the way of the ghosts, haunt the voice of youth
life that never will be is too bitter to swallow
Inner pain you never bought to sound


The Damaged We

Damage we eat and drink
alter the illusion,
the solution of peace
out of reach
Vanish to a shadow
of memories
in meadows
lost reveries
if love could be shaped
into a human play
After this lesson
of suffering
I offer me
the only one
I could bring
highways in your eyes
too dark to change
to fill with light
still I try to teach
with silence and compromise

Beginning

Questions make a void
in my soulless chest
of the known
my quest to end these dreams
time begins and ends
everything
a circular spin
in the womb
of the giving
you count endless worlds



the moon is coming undone
by the crying morning light
it cannot soothe with a song
generations fall heavy stones
of lessons never learned
as they cross paths in the sky
When will time stand still
for all to me the Ferris wheel
of dark and light, death and life

Answer 1

wow! really interesting... who wrote these?

Answer 2

Spend a little more time polishing your stuff. I get the feeling that you can take your poetry a few levels higher. Learn to self critique your work. For instance: mountains melt too with terror of truth.

Why the use of the word "TOO?" What caused them to melt before?

Mae.

Answer 3

have you ever seen a donkey make himself into an @ss? have you ever seen a monkey getting intense on grass? have you ever heard a birdy making a song to himself I drained to place in writing a poem yet I even bored myself.

Answer 4

Did you write that? Have you had it copywrited? Never post stuff that peole can steal - it's not good business sence.

I thought that was beautifully dark ( in a romantic way). I thought it was poinent. Intense. Important.

I really, really liked it. You have talent.

Answer 5

Not my cup of tea. Too narcissistic for my tastes. I'd rather cut open an apple and consider its wonder.

Answer 6

These are very good.

You should join http://www.editred.com

It's a fun writing community where you can get feedback on your work and give feedback to other writers.

Answer 7

This is very beautiful.Not to mention so sad .It makes tears come to my eyes . Is this your poetry ? I mean are you the original owner of this poem? If so are are extremely gifted and talented!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 8

They are really awesome, if u wrote them well done. Dont you want to write (or find) happier ones.

Answer 9

Yes but don't you find it odd ???