I hv a bf and we jz broke up last week..I don't know how to recover coz I wake up every morning and sleep at nyt weeping and I always remeber him. I gave him everything, all I need is a little trust..however, it looks like we're not makin any reconciliation..I don't know how to move on...I'm drowned in his memories and I still love him...but I don't think he feels the same...please give me good advice... I really need help..I fear God and I don't want to commit suicide...but everytime I thought of him, I wanted to scream to death just to forget him...please help me...somebody
2007-03-12 18:42:41 · 10 answers · asked by joysticks_21 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I do believe he's not the one only out there, so go to bowling alleys, theaters, start looking for others get your mind on track go out and enjoy life.
2007-03-12 18:49:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a song by Bonnie Raitt in which she sings "I can't make you love me". Your situation sounds like that song.
Here's my advice: Don't let this guy have this power over you. I know you're hurting and you feel as if your life is ending, but it will get better. All it takes is some time. Time heals. I know that sounds like a tiresome cliche, but it's the truth.
Don't even think about suicide! You feel losing him has somehow ended your life, but you've got a lot of living to do and I know there's a guy out there who would love to love you.
Keep busy and try to keep your mind off your boyfriend. Every time you think of him, put a dollar in a jar and when he's no longer on your mind, you can go shopping!
You're young. You'll get past this. I wish you all the best.
2007-03-12 18:52:42 · answer #2 · answered by miri-miri-off-the-wall 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't know how to move on? Just put one foot in front of the other... don't stop and don't look back! Just keep moving forward...
He must've been really special to have left such a lasting impression on you. But you know what? You have to move on. Maybe what you need is a change of venue, do something different, something you've always wanted to do but never had the chance to do it. Well now's your time to get out there and do it.
You need to get out of that secure environment that you're in now. It's filled with too much memories of him, and probably of the things that you used to do together. Get out there... travel... see different places... meet interesting people... do new and amazing things that you thought you could not do before. In time, you'll probably start forgetting about him and realize that it is truly wonderful to be alive. And who knows, you just might meet a very, interesting guy who'll love you like you've never been loved before.
It's definitely not worth it to kill yourself over him. What good will that do except end your life needlessly. And besides, he probably wouldn't care anyway, because if he cared for you, he'd be there with you now... but he's not. So forget him and move on to better things in life. It's a big world out there, and you're missing the boat!
2007-03-12 18:59:29 · answer #3 · answered by midnyt12 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of I'm sorry for your break-up...
Second the advice.... I may be a guy but i hope i can help and here goes...
"DONT COMMIT SUICIDE!"
I can see that you really loved the guy and I'm pretty sure he did as well but if you think that he's worth dieing for just to get back together it's not worth it...
You have to move on its the only way to go on with your life and if you guys are meant to be he'll be back I'm sure of it...
If your in pain bring it out SCREAM if you want weep if you want but remember if all those things are done you have to move on...
Life's like that... ^_^
2007-03-12 18:55:23 · answer #4 · answered by Jean Paul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had those go to sleep crying, wake up crying depressions and I know what that is like. I promise you - it does get better. It gets better faster if you move your body and get busy with your life. It's like a cloud follows you around but believe me, one day, you remember to look for the cloud and it has gone. Then things are better and you know it. I promise you - that is the way it happens.
2007-03-16 17:05:24 · answer #5 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, i am in the same situation, but mine has been 2weeks. I fear God as well and I believe in the bible. these same thought ran through my mind. I thought about my life and what i have been blessed with, my family, friends, looks and smarts. God has brought me and you to far to entertain these thought. because really it does not solve anything. but what i have been doing is talking to my family and friends and asking their advice. most of them tell me that i have to not let this guy control my life. i am in control of my destiny, their are many men out here who would really appreciate a good girl. but you need time to heal, it is okay to cry, but also you have to find something that is going to take your mind off of the current situation. and do not reach out to this guy because he does not know what he wants.
2007-03-12 18:55:37 · answer #6 · answered by caramelpop 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
remember there will be much more love in your life in the future. relationships are a great way for us to learn about ourselves. the rejection hurts so bad because it feels like you are being rejected by everything and everyone you have ever known. don't worry you will love again. and be loved again. it's OK to feel sad, know you will go on. no guy is worth killing yourself over, but thinking about suicide momentarily makes you very normal. the love you find in yourself during the process makes you stronger. first we must love ourselves. i know it is corney, but it's so true.
2007-03-12 19:27:35 · answer #7 · answered by Aubrey A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to focus on your lecture than focusing on men. If he's not interested, get a life of your own. But I realized that you're not so enlightened simply by the way you typed.
You better pay attention to school because your education is what will not fail you, while men will constantly fail you.
2007-03-12 18:52:54 · answer #8 · answered by Disabled 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hey girl the same happened with me but i'm worth than you he is now with my best friend he left me just for her but i want to tell u something plz forget him by doing things that make u 4get him like going out with friends or school or collage or any habit u like as reading painying this like that i make that and it works with me by singing and hey sweetie i feel that u r nice and pretty and kind so there is other guys that are waiting try to open ur door for them and take care.. GOD bless ya byeee
2007-03-12 18:51:57 · answer #9 · answered by Someone 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been where your at....I'm still there.....its not fun, and, if you receive any answers that are ugly or mean...disregard them, because people that have never experienced pain, to the point of feeling that you would sacrifice your own life, because a person that you should be able to trust has let you down, IGNORE them,
I have been feeling things I never dreamed I would....its hard, and people that have never felt them, have no idea...its not pity here....its pain, regardless of how old ....
But, the good news is, that old saying, "time heals", is really true, it heals, but it takes time. I agree with some of the other answers you have gotten, bout getting out, doing things you like. But, I wanted to tell you what I do, and it has helped so much. I will admit, I dont trust anyone in my life now, and people have their own problems to deal with, so....I have many journals now. I think you'll find, when you write your feelings down, you can be true about verbalizing how you really feel. There is no condemnation,or judging from anyone, and your secrets and most inner feelings are never at risk to being repeated, or exposed. The friend that I lost...I used a couple of spiral notebooks, and I wrote to him...when ever I would think of him, or a time we shared, or when I was so mad at how he handled our situation, I told him everything I wanted to say....except it was on paper. I am dropping it off at his house with a short note asking him to please real every page. that way, he can go thru my journey with me, and maybe help him see the pain he has caused me. NO, it wont reconcile anything, but it really and truely does your heart good to know that at least now, he at least has a clue to the impact he had on your life. It really is a great healing tool...and, as long as you dont act out a suicide attempt, it really will get easier. MY fear of God has kept me from doing something stupid many times...and hey, if you are a spiritual person, then God is the one to keep your eyes on anyway.
One more thing....you should get a book called, "captivating"...the author name is Stacy Allredge or something like that....something is pointed out in this book, and if you think of it, when ever your sad or having those crazy thoughts because of "him"....remember this....
Your God wants to, yearns to...have a close relationship with you. He too might wonder...."why wont she choose me?" he too, feels pain of rejection....
my point is, if God loves you that much, just how special do you think you are?...and if this guy dosent think your equally as special?.....then think about it, would you really want someone in your life like that?,,,,Nooooo, he is not worth it. It feels like it, but trust me, if he does not return your love, or whats more, even TRY? to understand you and what ever circumstances there might be....TD Jakes said it,
If someone in your life wants to leave, you cant make them stay! Let it go.....
If they wont stay in your life, return your love, then it means their part in your story is done....Let it go....
Hope I have helped some, its rough, but if your thoughts get serious, get help. You can even go to your nearest emergency room, check in, tell the nurse how your feeling...and they can get you help if you dont know where to go.
Please, stay safe, try to keep hope. We may not see the happy ending...but its there somewhere...
Take care and if you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to email me.....God Bless
2007-03-12 19:50:48 · answer #10 · answered by harleylover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋