Do you trust your spouse enough to tell them your most innermost fantasies and desires? For example, can you tell your husband that you often fantasize about having sex with the hot guy at the gym? Do you trust him not to completely freak out? If you trust someone you should be able to tell them anything. Not saying your marriage isn't strong, but it ain't built on trust.
2007-03-12 16:15:06 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
smilingt…that's exactly what it means.
2007-03-12 16:24:39 · update #1
true, so very true
2007-03-12 16:24:57 · answer #1 · answered by dƒ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trusting somoene does not mean that you no longer have any boundaries. There are things that are appropriate in a marriage - that build a marriage to last a lifetime, and then there are things that can eat away at it - like a cancer. Telling your husband that you want to have hot sex with another man... how does that build a marriage? Do you think it makes him feel desired? Honored? Respected? Do you think it makes him feel like he is enough? Like he's the man in her life? Like HE'S the one she desires? Telling your wife you think she's fat - is that honesty or is that damaging? Having an honest relationship is knowing what will be beneficial and what will harm your relationship and then sticking within those boundaries. Honesty used in the wrong moment or situation can be plain stupidity. Telling your wife you fantasize about another woman? Sure - it's real honest. But it's also a hop skip and a jump from a divorce.
2007-03-12 16:27:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in spite of if or no longer this is an "dependancy" is actual beside the element. this is a query of semantics. If this is inflicting strife on your marriage, this is a difficulty. once you're mendacity on your spouse approximately it, this is a difficulty. in case you be attentive to this is a difficulty and choose for to alter, yet save going back besides, then this is surely a difficulty. a loss of have confidence on your relationship is something you ought to take very heavily. I trust "D"s answer. The question isn't in spite of if or no longer it incorrect, or in spite of if this is an dependancy, the question is that this: How plenty do you adore your spouse? How plenty do you appreciate her needs? Which do you fee greater, your spouse, or porn? "development have confidence" is easy. a million) do no longer lie. 2) in case you're saying you're unlikely to do something, do no longer DO IT. 3) in case you *do* lie or do something you mentioned you won't, then admit your mistake and make an apology. no one's desirable. Now, i've got even have been given some techniques. the 1st is to no longer use the laptop once you're homestead on my own, or greater desirable yet, cancel your information superhighway connection if available. (in case you have been on a weight loss plan, could you pass to the save and purchase a gaggle of junk nutrition to fill your pantry? with a bit of luck no longer.) "Discretion is the greater desirable area of valor" ~William Shakespeare the 2d is whenever you experience like watching porn, pass call your spouse instead and tell her you adore her, or something....this is a sturdy thank you to heal your relationship instead of adverse it. There are different techniques of relieving tension, as an occasion, ask your spouse for a shoulder rub..... anyhow, sturdy success.
2016-12-14 17:38:02 · answer #3 · answered by parenti 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriages are suppose to be built on trust but very sadly this isn't the case with about half of them. It is one thing to say you have fantasies about someone else but unfortunately a lot of people in marriages act on their fantasies. The good thing to know is God will only bless the marriage. He will not bless cheating spouses that take their fantasies to reality.
2007-03-12 17:07:56 · answer #4 · answered by Tgirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dear just because you don't speak to each other about wanting sex with someone else doesn't mean that you lack trust. Mature men and women all have such feelings from time to time, even to the extend of thinking during lovemaking that it's someone else. Trust is knowing that each of you have these desires but that neither of you will act on these feelings because the price is to lose each other.
2007-03-12 16:23:04 · answer #5 · answered by smilingtalker_au 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
American marriages are based on fairy tales.
Anyway, to answer your question: Once my wife accused me of having a thing for one of my co-workers. After some months passed and I had totally forgotten about the accusation, she (the wife) talked me into "role playing" a 3 some with the co-worker woman as the imaginary 3rd party. I went along with the wife, thinking that she may've been turned on by the idea. So I really got into the role and had fun with it. When I actually mentioned/called out the woman's name during our "performance", the wife got mad and said, "SEE, I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING BETWEEN YOU AND HER! So I'll never trust her or anyone else with my fantasies or desires again...EVER!
Women are just wicked and evil when it comes to stuff like that.
2007-03-12 16:19:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
man that's right some things you can't tell the other because they mite not be on the same page as you yes trust is there but would you like to hear your wife tell you she is thinking about some other then you could you feel the same in bed? what would be going on in you head? is she thinking about you?when you are making love?some weather's are not to crossed at that point you would lose trust
2007-03-12 16:36:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you trust a person to that extent, you are putting trust on a pedistal so high that it will fall short.
Keep those thoughts to yourself, Just freely tell him things that you feel he wants to hear. That does not mean to not tell him of things that occur, but not your dreams and thoughts.
2007-03-12 16:36:26 · answer #8 · answered by Nort 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine is. I have told my husband fantasies that could probably get me arrested in most states if acted upon. He's never freaked out, but he has told me on a few occasions that that it is never going to happen. I can live with that.
2007-03-12 16:31:49 · answer #9 · answered by Poppet 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not about trust what you mentioned. It's about being sensitive to their feelings. If my spouse tells me about their fantasies, I would feel really hurt. Such thoughts should be keep private.
2007-03-12 16:25:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love & Trust & Respect & Friendship and a lot more..
Of course you do not tell your loved ones the things that
fly through your mind if it would hurt their feelings..
You don't tell them because you love them, not because
you don't trust them...
2007-03-12 16:44:15 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋