I was a stay at home mother of my dear, wonderful children for years. Ex wouldn't allow me to get an education while staying at home with them. Now that we are divorced, I have left to find a way to get back on my feet. (He quit his job and his millionaire family pays their bills.) I have officially hit poverty, but nothing has kept me from calling my children everyday. I especially have had a close relationship, connection with my daughter. Recently, my son was tested for ADD, now a behavioral specialist and my husband have agreed that he needs structure, and that I am to call them once a day at a specific time. I have spoke with the specialist as well, and I have agreed to do it, since it will benefit my children. Sadly, the past couple of weeks, it seems my children hardly talk to me at all. I talk to them on average about 3 to 5 minutes. (I used to talk to my daughter for nearly an hour a lot everyday.) My ex-husband says that if they wanted to talk to me they would call me.
2007-03-12 13:14:48 · 8 answers · asked by MissingMyKids 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I spoke with my children earlier and I believe one of the responders was correct on my children thinking I don't care, because I am not calling but once. My daughter started shouting at me and said: "If you don't want to talk to me just say so!"
I'm calling to talk to the specialist as soon as they open tomorrow. Thanks for the supportive responses.
2007-03-12 14:18:03 · update #1
Bull he is handing you crap about this. How old are the children? They need both parents in their life not just one. Fight to talk to them more. They may say they need struction in their life but they also need Mom in it also. They may think you don't want to talk with them. Don't allow him to do you and the children this way.
2007-03-12 13:20:56 · answer #1 · answered by Krinta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your children are likely too young to understand why you have made the decision to be absent from their lives at this time. You must consider that since he is there and you are not, he is the one filling in the blanks for them that they don't understand. If they are not feeling abandoned already, he might push them into feeling this way. Continue with your daily calls and get onto your feet as quickly as possible so that you can see your children. Also, continue to explain to them that you are taking time to get a new place ready for them to visit (in age appropriate terms obviously)! Good luck!
2007-03-12 20:42:11 · answer #2 · answered by Nurse Jacqui 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep trying to do the best with what you've got. Don't give up, in the end your children will understand how you tried and that you love them.
Good Luck
2007-03-12 20:30:47 · answer #3 · answered by cream city chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me he will get his just desserts if he is turning the kids against you. Have faith in yourself, you can get a job and be independent. Look for the joy in life, the kids are fed and safe. They will see that you are their only mom. First you have to turn to God and a good solid church family, this takes time but you can survive, they know you love them, they are just young and mabey confused. Can you have lunch with them once a week at school? Do not panic, i have been through that and i am fine. God Bless.
2007-03-12 20:23:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The kids are confused, they may be getting told that you don't want to talk to them or don't have time or money for them to live with you. Be positive, never lose hope on your kids, they love you and miss you and are more confused than anything. Stick with it and it will work out.
2007-03-12 23:16:14 · answer #5 · answered by Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, you don't ever get to see your children? Have your parental rights been terminated? If not, then why don't you have joint custody or visitation rights? And, if you have joint custody or visitation rights then why do you feel the need to call and speak to your daughter for an hour each day?
2007-03-12 20:44:02 · answer #6 · answered by RMarcin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just trying to hurt you, with what he's saying. Trust me on one thing, he will NEVER succeed. Those kids are going to love you, despite what he says, or does. You just keep right on being the best Mommy you can....it will ALL work out! Good Luck!!
2007-03-12 20:22:13 · answer #7 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give them time to miss you at least,let them feel the need to call you ,on the phone everyday is boring to them,it's nothing like in person
2007-03-12 20:21:36 · answer #8 · answered by kat_luvr2003 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋