Why don't people adopt babies?

Question

There's so many people who cry every day cuz they can't have a baby. They try for 5 or more years. Why don't they just adopt? Yeah, they didn't see the baby getting born, but it's still gonna be a beautiful baby, who will grow up like their own. And they can help it survive., and avoid living a miserable life of poverty! I've been trying to figure this out for a while

Answer 1

It is so hard to adopt a newborn that most people tend to give up on it. It's not that they don't consider adopting, it's just that a lot of people are given the run around. A friend of mine is 40. She has never been able to have children of her own. She was also tried to adopt a baby but after 10 years she gave up. Unless you're wealthy, planning to adopt an older childer or handicap baby, it just doesn't happen

Answer 2

I wonder that sometimes too. My parents were told that they would not be able to have children after about 2 years of trying. They adopted my brother when he was 6 months old from South Korea and then 3 years later they adopted my sister when she was 4 months old, also from South Korea. A few years later my mom was pregnant with me. I have grown up my whole life with my brother and sister (my brother is 32 my sister is 29 and I am 25) and don't think anything of introducing them as such even though they are a different race than me. I guess some people just really really want there "own" child not realizing that you can love an adopted child just the same. We were never treated any different growing up either. Well...except for when my sister and I fought and she would say that my mom and dad wanted her and my brother and I was an unwanted accident!!! I used to cry because I wasn't adopted too! Ha ha ha...on the other hand, I found out today that I may be infertile also and the thought of not carrying my "own" child is absolutly devistating.

Answer 3

Adopting a baby is not like adopting an animal. I know people try for years on end to have their own but there is nothing like the feeling of having a little life growing inside of you. It;s the best feeling in the world! It's just such a big accomplishment. I don't even know if I am using the right words It's hard to explain. Are you a mom? If so then hopefully you know what I am trying to get at lol. We plan on having 3 biological children my husband was adopted so in the future we also plan on adopting.

Answer 4

As an adoptive mother, I can honestly say that we tried for years to get pregnant before we finally chose to adopt. The reality for us was that adoption was extremely expensive and there is no guarantee that the parent will not change their mind at the very end of the process. You could potentially spend thousands of dollars for an adoption and still not have a child. We also met a lot of problems with not being allowed maternity leave to bring an adoptive child home, etc.

For me personally, I also had a very difficult time accepting that I would never experience the true joy of pregnancy and the special bonding that comes from childbirth.

It is very easy for outsiders to say "why not just adopt", but adopting is not as easy as it should be, and when you are struggling with the depression of infertility, it is difficult to think outside of the box.

We were blessed with a beautiful son through the miracle of adoption, and I would do it again in a heartbeat if we could afford it. But it wouldn't change the fears or the concerns that come with choosing to adopt.

Answer 5

I was adopted from S. korea and I love being adopted. I refer to my parents as my real parents and my family my real family. I dont know my birth parents though cuz I was a baby when I was adopted so I dont remember anything. People adopt babies all the time. I guess maybe they dont adopt cuz they think that the babies are not a part of themselves or something, but even though my parents are white some people say that I have my dads smile so in a way i do resemble my parents. I think more people should adopt Its really a great thing.

Answer 6

It's a wonderful question. I know several couples who were unable to have children and ended up going the adoption route...

First of all, adoption can be a VERY expensive process. The entire process leading up to the actual adoption can cost anywhere from $25,000 to $30,000 or more, depending on the situation. Not to mention that the waiting list to adopt babies can be anywhere from 5-10 years.

If someone is able to, it is much easier and less expensive to have their own child. Adoption is a very costly and stressful thing, and not everyone has the means to go about it.

Hope this helps a little...

Answer 7

Because as Human beings our ultimate goal is reproduction. When a woman can't get pregnant or a man can't get his partner pregnant for whatever reason she/he feels like she/he has failed the most primal task as a human being. The experience of having a child on your own is a incredible as well as the experience of being pregnant. For a woman who can't do that and doesn't have some medical reason why, she may long to be like the pregnant women and mothers she sees daily. So they try fertility drugs, and all of the how to get pregnant tricks until they have exhausted them all. This is also because Adoption is such a long process not everyone is madonna and can have people stand putside pf a hut with their babies and her just pick one out. It take years to get on the right list, another long period of time waiting for a baby to come along, and there are such rigid standards for adoptive parents that it's just easier not to. I mean if there are people who get pregnant without trying then some people feel like they should be able to get pregnant because they really want to. Can you blame them? It's a horrible analogy but image it being like getting a brand new toy right out of the package as opposed to getting a toy from someone else, you love the toy just as much but who can resist opening the package for themselves. I understand your point about helping children in need rather than making more, but be sensitive there are A LOt of women who have trouble getting pregnant and it's a very senstive topic.

Answer 8

Are you serious? Obviously you haven't looked into adoption and how long it takes and how much it costs and how difficult the governments make it. There are so many unwanted children and babies out there in need of a loving family but all the governments put policies in place that make it almost impossible. Please do some research before you open up a can of worms like this.

Answer 9

not everyone can adopt. I know someone who has tried to have her own children but couldn't for medical reasons. She went through two adoption agencies to try to adopt and was told that they could not adopt children out to her and her husband because of her husbands career( he's a cop and firefighter) and the risk that she could one day be a single parent if something went wrong in his career. it really is kind of sad because they would still be able to give a child a better life that it will have in a foster care.

Answer 10

I'd love to adopt a child, but I have such a need to have a child of my own, that I want to exhaust all the possibilities for my husband and I first. Honestly, everyone I've known, that's how it's been. I've never met a couple against adoption.