I made a mistake and got pregnant in high school. I did what I thought was right and got married. As soon as the ring was slipped on my finger he turned into a completely different man. He started yelling and telling me I was stupid. He gets mad and throws things, he's slapped me once or twice. I thought I could just deal with it but he's starting to turn his attention to our year old daughter, which I can't let happen. Unfortunately when I moved in with him I moved from MI to CA and don't have any friends or family in the area. My parents have offered for me to go back home but I don't' want to get in trouble for "kidnapping" if I take my daughter across state lines. Is it possible to leave with her or do I have to stay until the divorce is done? Right now I have no money to get an apartment on my own since my husband wont' let me go to school or get a job. I don't have a lot of resources.
Any input would be greatly appreciated.
2007-03-12 12:39:11 · 11 answers · asked by Phae2007 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do it legally by finding a shelter for abused women and children. Take pictures and document everything he does in a small notebook. I know it takes a lot of guts but if you don't make this move it will change who your daughter will become. Good luck to both of you.
2007-03-12 12:48:38 · answer #1 · answered by katydid 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not know if CA law is strict. Stay at a women's shelter until divorce is finalized and then get your butt home. I fled to my home state from an emotionally abusive husband and when I tried to file for a divorce from our home state, I was told that my daughter was still a resident of the state we had been living in and I would either have to wait 6 mo for her residency to change or go back to the other state and file for sole custody. And with emotional abuse, the courts often look the other way because there is no physical proof of abuse. Not only that, but the current state you are residing in could make it so you cannot leave with your child. Be careful. Contact free legal aid and ask them what needs to be done. I would hate to see you get back home only to have police and social workers come in and take your daughter away. The only reason my husband has not done anything is because he has a felony warrant for his arrest. But he could have sent police and social workers for (our) daughter.
2007-03-12 17:07:14 · answer #2 · answered by Ghost Writer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since there is a child involved you may not want to leave the state without consulting and attorney first and seeking help and guidance in what your options are in this matter and marriage. Are you going to counseling for the abuse you have been through in this marriage and relationship? You need to at least seperate and go to a safe house or a family members or a friends house for now. File for divorce asap and do things the smart way. Think before you act and make a plan. Pack your things and move out when he is not home to stop you from doing so. You do not have to stay with him until the divorce is final. You may be able to get a court order so you can leave the state with her though but do it legally first and dont just take her and run and leave. I also suggest you go to http://www.drphil.com and email him for help in this matter and he may help you with some options in leaving as well... Good luck to you and you and your daughter are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs to you today!
2007-03-12 12:51:43 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell me were you live and i will f*ck him up bad cuz i boxe and it will not end or start good and i hope he likes to get slapped cuz that's what I'm going to do to him when i see that son of a b*cth i promise you. try and find a shelter in CA and call your parents there and let them pick you up!!! and you will not be charged of kidnap it's your child and he was and is an abusive son of a gun. they will give you custody. God i hope
2007-03-12 12:48:05 · answer #4 · answered by James Dean Girl <3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in custody right? Then there is no kidnapping. You are just living with the child. When you get to where you are going file for speration of what ever sort and custody of the child.
2007-03-12 12:46:37 · answer #5 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would go home and file for divorce in the state that you are from so that you can be with your parents for the support. Talk to a divorce lawyer about your options.
2007-03-12 12:44:08 · answer #6 · answered by 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See if there is a woman's shelter that you can stay at until you have things lined up with your parents and the law.
2007-03-12 12:43:33 · answer #7 · answered by Tiger by the Tail 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Woman, get your *** to a battered woman's shelter ASAP!!! There you will find social workers to help you get whatever you need to get your life back together. And you better start thinking about that beautiful little girl of yours, get her the hell out of there!!!!!!!!! That clown is lucky that Rev Rene isn't around to see that! I'D teach that moron how it feels to have a size 10 shoe stuck up his ***!!!!!!!!
2007-03-12 12:47:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can get into an abused womens shelter, sometimes they can get you custody faster so you can legally go back to your parents.
2007-03-12 12:44:54 · answer #9 · answered by droopydog88 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ooo honey...I am so sorry.
California is a whole different ballgame...in divorce.
Go to an abusive home for women...they will help you...I know thats awful...but think of all the benefits that come with it.
I will pray for you sweetie.
2007-03-12 12:46:38 · answer #10 · answered by Bobbie4u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋