I am a full time student. I have paid child support for 4 years now. I being a full time student, only have time to work part time. I have my son 50 percent of the time, and his mother has him 50 percent of the time. I have to pay her child support to help her support him. I am a student trying to get an education, due to being unemployed by a company that went under. I cannot afford to pay me ex support and support my son on my side. I only pay 150.00, so it is not allot, but still that would help me buy clothes and what ever is needed for us to live. My ex lives with a succesful contractor, and only works about 12 hours weekly. I work 2 part time jobs to help support me and my son shile I attend college. My ex says she don't have to work and only works for a hobby. I am going in tomorrow to try and get my child support dropped. I thnk if I should have to work to support my son, so should his mother. Does anybody think that this is wrong? I here it from my ex, that I'm a deadbeat dad.
2007-03-12 11:19:45 · 16 answers · asked by mykd4sound 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe you should look at things this way to all of you who disagree. Between the 2-3 hours of school everyday, 7 hours of work daily, between the 2 jobs I have, 3 hours a night I get to spend with my son, on my weeks that I have him, and 3 hours of homework I have. Add that all up. No less than 13 hours are put in to my day everyday. I have my son in my custody as much as she does. She works 12 hours a week as a hobby. I have to pay child support, and pay his insurance, and she does absolutely nothing. So How does she support him? How does she put clothes on his back? I do it for her, and she does nothing. A week ago he tells me "dad I am getting too old for those toys, mom has bought me new toys why can't you? Dad I need new clothes, mom has bought me new clothes why can't you?" My answer is I do buy all that you talk about, but it stays at your mom's, I can't afford to buy clothes and toys for both me and your mom. I have spent al I have to put what clothes he has, and nothing for me
2007-03-12 13:42:24 · update #1
Besides, didn't she help bring him into this world? So why don't she have to help support him? She could work from 9 until 3, 5 days a week. That is 30 hours a week. No she works from 10 until 2, 4 days a week. That is 16 hours a week. I work double that in 3 days. She wants to be a stay home, and have me support her, wrong, I go in with my lawyer tomorrow and get doner what I can. I do thank all you that have put in positive messages, I planned on going through with the filing of papers tomorrow, I just needed a little piece of mind, thank you.
2007-03-12 13:49:00 · update #2
NO ONE SHUD BE PAYING SUPPORT AT ALL...u both share custody so she support the child on her time and u support on ur 50% time too..its only logical...go to court and get a good lawyer and hopefully, the judge will see the logic behind this..u both work to make this child and since u both share custody, u both support the child on both ur times and wont have to pay each other anything else.
2007-03-12 11:42:04 · answer #1 · answered by mitval 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
From what I have heard, don't know if it's different in each state, if parents have 50/50 custody, no one pays child support. If each person has him an egual amount of time then why should you be paying child support. I would talk to your social services about that. And wouldn't you rather see your child home with his mother instead of her working? That's kind of childish thinking you work so she has too. Come on!! I know some people hate the idea of this, but try to get medical assistant and food stamps, it'll help at least til you get on your feet more, just an idea.
2007-03-12 12:49:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have the child 50% of the time so I don't think you're a deadbeat dad. I've seen this situation time and again and some women freely admit they child support they get is just used as their "extra fun" money.
If your ex really needed the money I would say you should pay. But I also believe that she should put some effort into making some money too.
I hope the judge is reasonable.
2007-03-12 11:26:08 · answer #3 · answered by katydid 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ur r doing just what u can ur a full time student which is also hard work and work 2 part time jobs she has a new husband that seems to handle everything just find and she is working because she wants to not because she has to so drop a job buddy i thinku desearve it ... :) good luck ( also u both have the child y should u be paying for support and also she's married so the child support should have been droped)
2007-03-12 13:44:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it does not seem fair. You have shared custody and should not have to put out more support than your ex. My husband and his ex each had custody of one child and he was expected to pay child support - also not fair. But the ex moved around a lot so we could never find her to pay.
2007-03-12 11:25:32 · answer #5 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say no matter what this child is your responsibility until he is 18. Whether she is working or not you should want to give your child the best. You are not important anymore when it comes to a child. Swallow you error in judgment and work and support. The judge will laugh at you and are you ready for that humility?
2007-03-12 12:54:09 · answer #6 · answered by sweetgirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think if you both have joint custody I think it's only fair that you both support your son equally. And I don't think that your a deadbeat dad at all. It sounds like you just want your son to be happy, and your working your butt off to provide for him.
2007-03-12 11:30:46 · answer #7 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im a mother of two children and i think depends on the circumstances but if she is able to work but doesnt then she is lazy and if u have him half of the time then i think u should try and drop it if ur in full time education as its hard enough going to college even without a kid to support good luck
2007-03-12 11:26:30 · answer #8 · answered by tinkerbell 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be thanking your lucky stars that your child support is so low. good luck in court, you might get told that you have to work full time. My hubby paid $1200.00 per month for ONE KID, and his ex made 100K per year. Child support is your duty, too bad if your ex wants to use it for dance lessons, a pottery class, whatever. Life is a b*tch, then you die, pay up and stop crying about it.
2007-03-12 11:43:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
no way... if you share joint custody and youhave ur son 50% of the time, then u should not have to pay child support at all... its not exactly fair... i don't know how that works in the eyes of the law, but it sounds like you have a pretty good argument as to why you shouldn't have to... good luck..
2007-03-12 11:26:49 · answer #10 · answered by shiningstar1313 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋