I am a person a lot of people find very trustworthy, so I would be the person they would tell first. I am known for never telling any of my friends' secrets. But the problem is, I am a very caring person so I get upset when friends tell me upsetting news. Recently I have become very depressed with what my friends have told me. I don't feel like I need to tell anyone their secrets. I really like it when they tell me because I feel trusted and I can exchange secrets of mine for them. But lately its becoming too much. What can I do to feel better?
2007-03-12 10:25:40 · 3 answers · asked by freakishrockstar 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Sounds like you've now crossed over the line separating listening to your friends problems, and taking your friends problems and responsibility for their lives onto yourself.
Being a listening ear is wonderful. But, keep that boundary up. Their problems are not yours. You can't fix them, they can only fix themselves. By listening and being an ear for them to get out their issues so that they can sort through their feelings is part of being a good friend.
How are they with listening to your problems? You need to be fed too. Do you have a close friend who does this for you? If not, get one. The book I've referenced below will help you greatly in being able to be the listening ear for your friends without it draining you.
Perhaps being a psychologist is in your future. Psychologists have to master this skill of boundaries or they go nuts with all the problems they hear hour after hour, day after day.
2007-03-12 10:36:41 · answer #1 · answered by Sly Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey, i am a lot like you. except for the fact that i DONT tell others about me much. but i have started a journal to write it down into. your writing to yourself, and it feels much better because you havnt told anyone.
i often feel depressed about it to. so when i do, i write it down in my journal, or write a song.
i used to cut when i was upset. sometimes i still do, but then my journal really helped.
hope i was of help
⥠dreamer
2007-03-13 21:58:08 · answer #2 · answered by that one girl from that one band 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is an old saying: Don't burden yourself with other people's problems.
Besides, you've got problems of your own, right?
2007-03-12 17:34:13 · answer #3 · answered by m k 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋