my grandmother is 87 years old and has an apartment and when my family is not taking care of her my uncle goes to her apartment almost every day and does everything for her.
sometimes she comes to our house and practically lives in our living room.she sleeps alll day and is VERY rude to all of us .she does not appreiates everything we do for her.she has to be begged to do anything on her own.my family have wittness her doing things perfectly with no trouble at all that she has asked us to do. she makes my sister extremly mad and annoyed and stresses out my mom.she will never admit anything.and always gets her way most of the time because she is older and my family is afraid to say no to her.she has acted rude and disresecptful to atleast everyone of my family members.she makes calls to everyone of her friends and children at least once a week and tells our personal things to them. my sister has suggested we sit her down and talk to her about this. BUT PLEASE HELP ME!
2007-03-12 08:53:02 · 10 answers · asked by ChikkitaBananaa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i am sorry if i sound rude but this is the truth
2007-03-12 08:53:36 · update #1
or atleast how do i deal with her bossing me around
2007-03-12 10:15:45 · update #2
Give her a break and try to overlook the little things that bother you when you are around her,At least you still have her to love in the late autumn of her life, Try to make what time there is left with her pleasant and try to under stand that she doesnt mean to be snippy or mean,She is in a stuggle herself and she at least has your family to go to and not be thrown away into a rest home where she wouldnt have much to look forward to but maybe once a week or month when someone might remember to visit her for 15 minutes,She loves you and you need to know that, juist bear with it because you wont have her much longer.
2007-03-12 09:16:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
At 87, she may be using her strength to do just what she wants to do and no more. She doesn't have the friends in her life she used to have because a lot of them have probably died or are in nursing homes. She tells her friends and children your business because she knows your business and she likes for people to think she is involved in your lives and a good source of gossip.
You can talk to her about it but she's just going to get upset and try to make you feel guilty. Every time she comes to your house, you could have a 'babysitter' for her who will do the things she asks you to do normally - this isn't much different that having a kid around the house who is annoying and too demanding.
Some things are easily solved with money - this is one.
2007-03-20 11:58:55 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough situation. Is it your dad's or mom's mom? It should be granny's kid who sits her down and tells her "We love you but..." Does she still have siblings that are alive? Maybe you can have them in on the meeting too.
The more she does the better for her, physically and mentally. Maybe also look up what an in-home-nurse would cost and just tell her that you would be happy to set something like that up, if she wants to pay for it.
She is old, probably has a hard time dealing with getting older and is worried about being abandoned....that might be part of the reason why she is crabby.
2007-03-12 16:01:16 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My parents are in their 80's. My father has dementia, and he is rude and mean. I think that just goes with the territory. Don't take it seriously. (Easier done then said). If you just explain to other people that "gram is a little touched with dementia so please excuse her poor attitude", they will understand. My sister even had cards made up that she passes out to waitresses and bank tellers and store clerks. They say something to the effect "hi. I am with Rain Man. Please let me know if he says or does something that offends you. Thank you." Hiding your personal affairs is kinda difficult if she lives with you. If someone confronts you about something she has said, I would just say, "well, you are just getting her side of the story.". Good Luck.
2007-03-20 15:31:07 · answer #4 · answered by kathy s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are times to nice to someone that old but you have to all so remind them where they are at and why they are there in the first place and that its your home not her but I seen that one that answered is on the right path about this question but all so a little on the wrong path . yes she is 87 and her life is half over but she still needs to have the respect in others homes and not tell the world what goes on in there best of luck to you ..
2007-03-20 15:32:04 · answer #5 · answered by patti_buffkin2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg my grandma was like that too. Look, she's taking advantage of ur goodness and she knows that because she is older than everyone else, that everyone should respect her (which you guys should) BUT, you have no obligation to listen to someone or be treated like crap if there is no reason for it. Best advice: first sit her down and be VERY serious when you warn her and let her know that is NOT acceptable.
2007-03-18 21:03:07 · answer #6 · answered by hondachick 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really think that is the only way you guys are going to get anywhere with her. Have some type of intervention. Let her know that you will not put up with her rudeness anymore. make sure you let her know how much you love her but are done putting up with her rudeness. Good luck.
2007-03-12 16:00:21 · answer #7 · answered by live, love, laugh often! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
uve gt 2 talk 2 her.n sumtimes wen she talk rude 2 her,just make ure tone higher 2 her maybe she might be scared n stop talkin rude.am nt tellin 2 shout at her bt just 2 make reason.n ders no harm in doin dat 2 protect ur privacy at home.
2007-03-18 10:36:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you little BRAT--whats wrong with you?? i don't care if she calls china--i don't care if she goes on tv and tells all about how she got pg-----i don't care if she sleeps on the kitchen table naked----SHE'S 87--GET A LIFE--BECAUSE HERS IS ABOUT OVER---JESUS--WHAT DO YA WANT ----BLOOD!!!!
2007-03-20 10:38:25 · answer #9 · answered by Billie R 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OMG......... GOD!!!
MY GRANDMA IS THE SAME WAY. SHE IS ALWAYS BIOTCH'N ABOUT EVERYTHING, THEN SHE ACTS ALL SORRY AND INISENT CAUSE SHE IS OLD. AND THEN SHE CALLS UP VIRGINA,RC,INEZ...... ETC. ALL HER WIERD FUNKY BROS AND SIS'S. AND THEN SHE TALKS ABOUT US.
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH ............ THIS PERSON HAS THERE PERIOD....... THIS PERSON DID THIS............. THIS PERSON IS SO MEAN TO ME........IM SO HELPLESS............SHES GOING OUT WITH HIM AGAIN......... I HATE HIM SO MUCH..........BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH....................LOL
SHES PHSYCO!!!!!!!
2007-03-19 22:51:58 · answer #10 · answered by Jennifer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋