my bf wants to have it but im scared.... my bff just had sex with her ex and said thats shes really late and is scared shes pregnant im 17 and my bf is 17 too we would us protection.... i had him swear that....but is there any way to get out of having sex??? can u figure me a different idea of things we could do without actually having sex????? HELP I NEED ADVICE
Sincerly SCARED
2007-03-12 07:45:40 · 29 answers · asked by stolen_innocent 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
the problem is that my best friend tamara just had sex with her ex and now shes really late with her peroid and ths is her 2nd scare but i dont wanna get pregnant and josh(my boyfriend) ISNT FORCING ME
2007-03-12 08:02:59 · update #1
were both virgins
2007-03-12 08:07:19 · update #2
If you don't want to have sex then don't, if someone wants to pressure you into doing somehting you dont feel comfortable with then he isn't a good guy for you.
I'm 17 and I lost my virginity to a guy when I was 14 because he pressured me and now I really regret ever doing that...I wish I had waited.
Here are some websites that may help you:
http://www.thesite.org/sexandrelationships/sexuality/awareness/amireadyforsex
http://www.simcoehealth.org/simcoespeaks/Pages/ready_quiz.htm
http://www.scarleteen.com/sexuality/readiness.html
http://www.seventeen.com/health-sex-fitness/special/sex-parents-hsp-0404
2007-03-12 08:09:58 · answer #1 · answered by NoNoDontGo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it all because he wants to, he's not thinking responsibly - your best friend is late on her period, and is stressing out - is that the position that you want to be in? I've had that scare, and it's not fun, and I wasn't nearly as young as you all are - I had my own place and was in a steady job. So what I'm saying is, if he truly loves you for you, then he'd wait. Sex is not something to take casually and it's not something you can turn back from whether you're a virgin or not. Sure, you have those feelings, but you have to use your brain to think, not anything else. When you think about sex, just think, are you ready to tell your parents that their little girl is pregnant or that you're having problems down there because you made an adult decision when you weren't fully knowledgeable and ready, I don't think they'd enjoy that. I'm not trying to be mean, I'm just being honest. Sex is wonderful when you're completely ready and you don't have to worry about being too young and never being able to get to your goals.
2007-03-12 14:59:05 · answer #2 · answered by HappilyEverAfter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on whether you respect yourself enouth to not have sex. One thing to rememeber is that condoms do not stop many STD's including the most important one AIDS. The virus is much smaller that the standard cracks in condoms and fall right through the cracks. The condom will stop spern because it is bigger than the cracks. The gestation period, (time to become infected), is at least 2 years from the time of the last sexual experience. In other words after each sexual experience you must wait at least two years and be tested during that two years to make sure you are free of the disiease. If you have sex with many different people you must count each experience as one experience. Remember you will share anything your partner has with anybody else and visa versa. Use you head not your emotions. Besides, speaking as a former embryo, as your girlfriend may now find out, there is another life to consider
2007-03-12 14:57:22 · answer #3 · answered by KIB 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best advice I can give you is just to tell him you're not ready. If he cares about you, he will be willing to wait. If he won't wait, maybe it's better to know that now. The right guy will not rush you and will wait till you're ready too. If you feel like you need some moral support, talk to your mom. She will support your choice to wait and will help you get through this. I think the first time should really be a special thing and should mean something. You don't want to regret it.
If it makes any difference to you, I was 17 my first time too, and he was in a bigger hurry to have sex than I was. It wasn't that great and we broke up soon after that. I wish I had waited because then my future husband and I started dating and I wished that he was my first.
Best wishes to you.
2007-03-12 15:00:11 · answer #4 · answered by mom of 2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this may sound hard, but just say "No!" It's quite clear you don't want to. If your bf loves you and respects you he'll respect your wishes. If he doesn't then why date someone who doesn't regard your heart. There are somethings in relationships that are neogiable, this is NOT one of them. That's why they call it "rape." Plus, there is a good chance of getting pregnant or an STD. Why put yourself in a situation of having to possible deal with that? You're 17!! Enjoy other parts of your life right now!! Sex will come in time. It sounds like you may have some fear of rejection towards your bf otherwise you'd have told him no by now. To deal with that, cultivate some non-romantic relationships that will help build you up emotionally so that when things like this pop up, you'll have the inner emotional resources to be able to express your desires and opinions. You're talking about a serious heart issue here. Sex is more than just a physical act. It's the bringing together of two hearts. You don't want to unite your heart with another until they have proven themselves worthy and mature enought to handle that. If your bf is resisting your hestitancy or pushing you to do something against your wishes,then he has proven himself too immature to be trusted with something extremely important.
I'd also suggest asking some of your girlfriends who've had sex outside of marriage if it was all that they dreamed it would be and how did they really feel about it.
This is more than just about your body. It's about your heart! And that is precious!!
Good luck!!
2007-03-12 14:59:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart...you are not ready for sex. I can tell from your email. Just be honest & tell you bf the truth -- that you're just NOT ready for intercourse & that you don't feel comfortable right now with the idea of having sex. FYI the 'other' things you refer to won't get you pregnant, but COULD give you a STD anyway. Your best bet is to say "no" for now. Good luck.
2007-03-12 14:52:12 · answer #6 · answered by napqueen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want sex then just plain tell your boyfriend no sex period. If he won't accept this then dump him immediately. He should put your wants and needs first if he is really sincere about you. Also if he is already having sex he should get tested for STD's to be safe. You can just make out or even have oral sex but insist on him wearing a condom and using a dental dam on you. To me this boy sounds to eager to have sex instead of just spending time with you getting to know you better.
2007-03-12 14:51:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like u do not have money to get protections. If you do not have protection, you must not play with fire, it will be very messy if u do get ur self pregnant.
When you have dates or private moments, make sure ur bf jerk off multiple times before attempt to come near the real thing.
This is not all safe, but it does reduce the potency when things getting out of control.
2007-03-12 19:10:38 · answer #8 · answered by Sir W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just dont have sex. when you get older there is plenty of time to do that. Trust me nothing is worse than having a child young, or worse being in a position where abortion seems like the only option.
Both of these have serious consequences..
JUST SAY NO.
2007-03-12 16:08:18 · answer #9 · answered by ohmyhead69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont hav sex if u dont want it and think u ready.....if ur bf really loves u he should understand and wait and if he doesnt he does not respect u and care den u should even leave him dont let him push u-.......der r other things 2 do lots...u can give oral sex or receive oral sex....u can giv a hand job...or he can finger u......i dont kno der r loads of things or u could hav sex above clothes etc.......gud luck hope noting goes wrong
2007-03-12 14:53:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋