Question for the girls?

Question

Are you obsessed with your appearence and does this obssession have any thing to do with the male influences in your life?

Answer 1

I am way past being concerned about my appearance. I like to look as nice and well put together as I can but I dress for myself, not any men.

Answer 2

No I could care less about what I look like to other people. And no I'm not obssessed with my appearance. I am however shy when I go out with my husband in hijab though because people say things and stare at me which really makes me hurt and annoyed.

Answer 3

I speak for what I see,

Yes they care a lot. I go to a school of 4,000 kids in high school. No joke. I see it everywhere, girls putting a large amount of make up. I was sitting on the bus once and these girls were sitting across from me. They were pretty and attractive. Then they started putting on makeup. It seemed like a small bag so I stopped paying attention. Ten minutes past... They were still putting it on... I watched and counted now... They were putting it on for an estimate of thirty minutes. Many don't care, sure, but most put on heavy amounts like their scared of what they will discover without it. Hell, one girl was freaking out from a barely visible zit. It was no big deal, no one would have noticed.

Now for the other question.

I think it does have a small influence. That same girl I know that was freaking out about the zit was obsessing over her hair because she had to see a guy after school. I told her, "Stop worrying, your hair is dry like hay now because of all the times you straightened it. You ruined your hair, so let it rest." But she still does because she worrys over what people would think of her. But it's not entirely for males either. It could be because of media as well. I feel bad sometimes and want to go out and buy a large amount of make up when ever I see my acne. It's a small amount, but it seems like a large amount to what we are "supposed" to have. We may feel bad when we don't reached those expectations that seem like we too.

I had that same girl say I don't look too good, and yet she tells everyone I have ten boyfriends. (Not true of course, I love my current one and he's a handfull... I don't know how I would be able to handle two.) It's the want to stand out and make others appear to be of less "value". To get that "value" they have to hide their flaws. Those girls I mentioned... They want to be considered better because of looks, I think thats why they care so much. I might be wrong, but I'm pouring my experience in this.

Answer 4

no.
i used to it, but i got over it. i used to check the mirror every five seconds (no, that's an exaggeration. maybe every ten seconds) to check how my hair looked, how my face looked, and i'd get more and more upset with every moment spent scrutinizing, because, and I know this as well now as I did a while ago, i'm not entirely perfect. I saw myself as a monster, someone no guy would want to talk to. And when a guy DID come up to talk to me, I would avert my eyes and try to hide my shortcomings.

It took me a while to discover that this--my low self-esteem--was exactly what was causing the lack of male influence in my life.

So gradually (and i do mean gradually; it took a while) I began thinking positively. Of course, there were some things I had to manipulate in orer to get my mind thinking, for once, that I was okay-looking, such as avoiding mirrors whenever possible and whispering to myself, "I am me. I am me." whenever i had to go talk to a guy.
But after a while, I got so used to it I didnt even think about my appearance anymore. I'd pass by a mirror, glance at it, smile at myself, and head on. Instead of focusing on the negative, I guess I learned how to focus on the positive, and for the first time in a while I looked guys in the eye while we had a conversation.
It helped a bit that my cousin had come to visit; she drove around in a wheelchair after a car accident, and I felt so guilty about hating myself when this girl sitting in front of me loved herself so much. I felt guilty about how I hated my 'slightly pudgy' thighs when my cousin didn't even have thighs. Finally, my cousin saw what was up and talked to me about everything.

Of course, I dont go walking around with bedhead, but I don't care (as I would have before) if a hair is misplaced or if my hairstyle is 'perfect'

=]

That got really long, and I'm sorry
But the answer is...
yes, i used to be. but not anymore. i know better now.

Answer 5

NOOO! I think i Look fine and if any guy don't like it well tuff for them. . but i am glad that guys like how i look. i think that noone should be telling anyone that they are ugly because it can hurt someones' feelings, and that is why we all have different taste. also, is the inside that really counts.

Answer 6

No -

it's a right of passage when you get to be a certain age.
It's more about me - and do I love what I see - why yes and I need to be happy with me.

GOD bless us always.
MBA-Boston Univ.

Answer 7

i like to look good and the thing which influences me is my mirror.

Answer 8

I am not opssessed with it, I just like to look good, so I do common stuff, depilation, hair, make-up... no extremes. and of yourse I like when men like my appearance, it's only natural. I think they like it when I like theirs too:-)