I can't decide whether to break off my friendship or try to hold on for reasons of logic.?

Question

I have a friend of over 20 years who has stood by me and supported me, but I have also suffered a lot of ridicule and disrespect. Lately there was an incident that really made me want to put an end to the friendship. But, my logical side tells me I maybe should not remove a source of support, while my heart tells me I should empower my self-esteem by confronting the person and making them aware that I won't take the abuse any more. I am very torn on this issue.

Answer 1

Sometimes friends change and grow together, other times they grow apart. The friendship doesn't stand the test of time due to experiences shared or communication and such.

I would re-evaluate the reason why you think it has been a constant source of ridicule & disrespect. Did you ever discuss those issues with this friend? Many times the miscommunication, or the varied types of humor can be misconstrued. The other person cannot read you rmind unless you speak your mind at the time, not 20 years later.

Also, could it be that the miscommunication has made you feel insecure, when the person never meant to harm you? Also you cannot keep a source of support as you say it, without them giving you or making you feel like you have their support. I am just wondering if your emotions are based on solidity here, not your feeling a bit hurt from some misunderstanding (just playing devil's advocate here)

If you HAVE been thinking and have second thoughts on this friendship, then maybe suggest a bit of time away, needing space and so on, and reconsider in a few months, or a few years. Make sure this is something you want, and if you're over reacting, you will still be loosing a friend who maybe you just didn't agree with over a few misunderstandings.

Take care and best of luck.

Answer 2

If a friend is continuously hurting you, then you should end the friendship. A true friend wouldn't hurt you or cause you any harm. This is a decision where you have to weigh both sides. You may even want to make a list of pros and cons to keeping or ending the friendship. Just think whether what happened is worth ending your friendship, but if this person is continuously causing you some kind of sorrow or hurt, then it would probably be best for you in the long run to end the friendship. It will be hard at first, but in the end you will know it was the right decision

Answer 3

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Answer 4

Get on with it and tell her that u desire ur area...the certainty that u dont wanna convert, an the certainty that u have an interest in having a courting along with her.... Be frank abt it, and purely tell her. some ppl hate the certainty that one beats around the busy, so purely tell her to buzz off, pass removed from u if u sense thats what u desire.... tell her that, i will verify ur no longer involved in a courting advantageous by making use of me, yet back, tell her that u desire ur area and dont relish the certainty that she sticks to u "generally". tell her on the face; she might think of ur a impolite dude, yet then u vented all of it out dint u? and u desire ur frendship to b casual like a hi hi one, or smthing... then purely tell her that, u relish area. and back, think of if she does come around and say she wwud desire a courting wit u, think of abt it no count if u wud desire to have it or no longer.... after u've asked her to head away, i doubt it. yet before asking her to head away, ask her on the face, wud u b my woman, or smthing... if she says no, tell her u dont relish her strikes an the certainty that u desire the putting out company to b customary or watever.... n tell her that u'd relish it if u have been given some area. thats especially lots it... be beneficial enuf to inform her on the face!