2007-03-12 06:18:27 · 15 answers · asked by Jodi 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I don't think that you can truly forgive until you learn to trust them again. Make them earn that trust back after you've been hurt that way.
My boyfriend cheated on me last year and I love him with all my heart, but there's still more trust that needs to be earned before I can truly forgive him for what he's done.
I don't think you'll ever forget about it because it will always be in the back of your mind. You just have to take it from day to day.
2007-03-12 06:25:07 · answer #1 · answered by BbyGrl80 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth is, that's up to you. It's not easy getting trust back once it's gone. So the real question is, is the relationship worth saving? I'm not sure if you 2 are married or not, which puts a different spin on it if you are.
I was in a relationship with a man who cheated on me. There was a lot more drama with it, but that was the bottom line. I decided to try to stay and stick it out. We decided together. I asked him every friggin question that came to mind about the situation--about her, him, me, how he felt, etc. And he never got an attitude about it or got defensive. That's how I knew he was trying. He patiently let me ask anything I wanted, no matter how many times I asked or when. He knew that was what I needed to process things. Having that freedom led me to trust him again.
But the truth in that is one day, I told myself, "There's gonna have to come a time when I just have to trust him." I had to make a conscious decision to do it. I started with little stuff, to see how it would go. I let him go out with his friends, no questions. I didn't check his cell phone. It was hard, but as time went on, things got easier. Because he was working on it too.
The forgiveness came MUCH faster than the trust.
2007-03-12 13:25:49 · answer #2 · answered by Infamous B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Pain of infidelity lasts forever, and it is not in your best interest to put your self in a compromised position again to be left vulnerable for the situation to recur. You may definitely choose to forgive the person........
2007-03-12 13:27:11 · answer #3 · answered by DesiGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive but never ever forget, and the person has to earn your trust.
2007-03-12 13:30:27 · answer #4 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive, but you can't forget. The trust will never
be there again.
2007-03-12 13:28:34 · answer #5 · answered by lizzy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly? YOU don't; HE DOES. He has to earn that trust and your forgiveness. If he doesn't earn it etc...then there's your answer; and very possibly he'll do it again; question is if it's worth it?
2007-03-12 13:26:10 · answer #6 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its hard, my best mate which i had known since i was 8 years old, well she got me together with her ex and she went out with mine, when me and this guy split up i discovered she slept with him while we were together, i didnt speak to her for about 6 months it was painful, but she was my best mate and i could never turn my back on her, in time it passes
2007-03-12 14:07:54 · answer #7 · answered by Charlotte S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats tough. not everyone can do it. all you can do is give it a try. it wouldnt be fair to either of you if you couldnt forgive him/her. it would be better to move on. good luck.
2007-03-12 13:22:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't you can trust them any more nomare how much you loved them things will never be the same
2007-03-12 14:30:20 · answer #9 · answered by babyphat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not to sound glib but with a lot of patience and a lot of time. best of luck to you
2007-03-12 13:22:36 · answer #10 · answered by simplyme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋