What makes marriage so hard?

Question

My friend told me that marriage is hard. Why? Just curious?

Answer 1

You have to make the right choices, before you ever consider marrying someone.

You need to be right with yourself, have your stuff together, mentally,sphyically, spiritually, future, education,etc.

You need to some that has their stuff together also, and I don't mean stored at mom and dad's house, unless he's in school
Marriages are hard because ppl. rush into them, without truely knowing the person their about to ask to spend the rest of their life with.
Make a checklist of things a man has to have before he can even be considered in the running for a husband.
And not one of those things should be about looks, size, color of eyes, etc. Let's face if everyone married a ken or barbie doll the world would suck.
1. A man never touches you in anger
2. Respect each other
etc. Make a list and stick to it

Answer 2

Marriage is difficult because people often don't sacrifice for one another. Having disputes and disagreements are normal and healthy, but when one person becomes selfish, fights erupt and it becomes very difficult quickly. Sacrificing is never happy or feel good (it's why it's a sacrifice) but finding happiness in your partner's happiness is what will get you through.

It also just takes alot of work to be with someone else all the time. It's another personality, and they live with you, breathe with you, eat with you. It takes getting used to, and it's probably why many marriages end within one year. If people don't know each other well enough those first couple years can be a shocker.

Marriage can also be difficult if there is no friendship involved to begin with. Sometimes people can get married on a whim and it works out wonderfully, but that's rare. Most people aren't like that, if they get married that fast it will almost guarunteed fail because they just don't know each other intimately enough.

Answer 3

Let me give you the opinions of someone who's been happily married for 36 years.

It's only "hard" if one or both of the people involved doesn't have the emotional maturity to live in harmony with another human being.

If people don't have enough sense of compromise, they'll always have trouble working out problems, small or large.

If they don't have enough sympathy and forgiveness, they'll never get through anything serious and they'll forever be holding each others' mistakes over their heads.

If they don't have enough common interests, and instead have separate passions and groups of friends, that's not always good. A relationship is about "we;" not "me-me-me."

We're all human, and we're going to screw up at times, say the wrong thing, be cranky, etc., etc.

The trick is being able to roll with that and just get along.

Forgive me, but I just take things like good sex for granted. We both have a healthy sexual appetite and we enjoy satisfying it.

And, while a relationship is about two people enjoying each other, you also have to allow for some personal space. You need some alone time...to do....whatever...you want to do....alone.
Call it privacy, call it personal space, but everyone needs a certain amount.

If you can handle all that and avoid arguing about money, you'll be in good shape; certainly ahead of the crowd.

Answer 4

Constant compromise. The hardest part in the beginning was sharing a bathroom with a man. You don't fully understand that until it happens. Try taking a shower and then he comes and plops down on the pot. Then he hurries out before your shower is over and he doesn't have the decency to light a candle or anything.

The other hard parts are money and parenting. You have to share the money and decide who gets what, who buys what, and so on. And kids. ...how was he raised?...how does he look at parenting (strong hand, spanking, or let them get away with everything) if he doesn't have the same views then there is another compromise.

Oh, let me add this, my hubby and I dated only seven months before eloping. We've been married five years this month and it has only gotten better with time.
Its worth it though. My hubby and I can argue brutally, then the next morning be fine. "Want some coffee honey?" Lol

Answer 5

it takes two for a marriage to work...that's why it's hard or if one or both have children from a previous marriage/relationship. it takes work to make the family work...it's a give and take relationship. some people don't see that and think or feel that it should be all about them, but it's not like that at all. you have to love the one you are with and be willing to work with them...communication , trust, love ...all that is key.

Answer 6

You have to work really hard to make a marriage work.
Two people must be equally committed. What makes it hard is that sometimes the two people aren't always on the same page.

Answer 7

Mine isn't. I think marriage is hard when the wrong people get married.

Answer 8

its because u are combining 2 different lives together. You have to learn how to compromise and all of that. Learn how to live with each other through the good and the bad.

Answer 9

it is only hard when things dont get hard for the loving

Answer 10

Responsibility & commitment