My brother always gets upset when I try to talk to him. Or when anyone tries to talk to him. he gets very defensive and acts so childish. I have had enough with him as my parents have too. and his girlfriend. He talks to everyone in the house like crap and when things don't go his way he stomps off or throws things around.
How can we get to him?
He is 20 years old.
2007-03-12 04:50:53 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Act like it doesnt even phase you...he will stop getting a thrill out of it!!!!!!
2007-03-12 04:55:04 · answer #1 · answered by milo2angel 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all you can't change people especially adults. Leave him alone, don't say anything about his faults or whatever. Just let him live his own life and in the end he's going to find out wherever he goes he's going to run into this problem, especially on the job. It might even get him fired a few times or left out of the group. Before he knows it he'll be a very lonley man.
2007-03-12 05:24:14 · answer #2 · answered by freekin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he always like this or just recently? If its recent, then maybe something at work or college has bothered him. If he won't talk, then stop trying. Maybe he'll handle it himself... Keep quiet for a few days and don't pay attention to his tantrums. He may sort out his problem himself. If he can't maybe he'll go to your parents. The best action you can do in this case is inaction.
2007-03-12 04:59:58 · answer #3 · answered by beachblue99 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents never told him "No" hun"? Temper-tantrums at 20 yrs old ... common problem. However, it's harder to fix when he's taller than you and out weights you.
Personally, I tell them what needs to be done in a quiet voice. If they don't listen, then I sit back and watch them hang themselves. Then when they've exhausted themselves from their own self-destructive behaviors, I let them know (usually by a look) "Ha-Ha --- Told you so".
Failure is a good teacher. Painful to watch, but works. However, if illegal stuff is going on ---> you need to be more aggressive.
2007-03-12 04:57:08 · answer #4 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's no pleasing some people no matter how kind you are.
Ignoring his negative behavior might rile him more, but I would give it a try.
Don't let him get to you. If he throws something, don't pick it up. Leave it. Don't cater to him. Don't wait on him. Live your life without letting him faze you. If he asks you a question, walk away.
Let him "see" how stupid he's acting. He's spoiled and knows it.
Let his words fall on the floor, and don't pick them up.
Hopefully he will get the message.
If he gets physical, get help.
2007-03-12 05:01:44 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him alone. Given time he'll tire of people not speaking to him and make the first move. Be prepared at that time to find out what is going on with him, so have your questions ready and your ears open to actually listen to what he has to say.
2007-03-12 04:57:17 · answer #6 · answered by marklemoore 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Better off letting a psychologist do the preliminary work. Seriously. But if your parents don't want him in the house, they have every right to insist that he leave. Same for his girlfriend.
2007-03-12 05:07:44 · answer #7 · answered by Bud's Girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is time to set him free. If living with your parents and having everything,is not working for him tell him to find some place more to his liking. He is someone that just has to learn the hard way, so do not stop him.
2007-03-12 05:01:59 · answer #8 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time he gets out on his own. He's being spoiled rotten being allowed to act this way. The family should tell him to clean up his act, or give him his walking papers. He's an adult.
2007-03-12 04:57:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time for him to move out. Your parents need to tell him to go. They are enabling him to be a sponge and to act childish.
2007-03-12 04:59:49 · answer #10 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋