We have been married for 23 years. Since we moved in our new house (12 years ago) my wife will only have sex in the closet in the dark. She says she doesn't want the kids to hear. Also, we only have sex about once a month. It always seems like a chore to her and she gets mad if I want sex. When she does give in she always says something like "Remember, I don't have all day". And another thing....she will not kiss me in a passionate way anymore.
2007-03-12 03:48:22 · 14 answers · asked by Concerned 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe I should mention that the closet is rather large....not that it makes much difference.
2007-03-12 03:58:04 · update #1
When I first saw the question (with out your description) I thought that after years of marriage your wife was trying to spice things up. Sex in strage places in the house can be loads of fun and change things up a bit. However, after reading what your wife has been doing to you I really think that you guys need a little help. I would suggest going to couples therapy to help her get over whatever the issues are. It may not be that she does not love you, rather she is board after 23 years and may be stressed out about day to day life. This does not mean that you should be neglected, but if you can find the source of the problem you may be able to start to help her get over it. When was the last time the two of you took a vacation with out the kids? Can it be that your relationship has gone a little stale because the two of you never have time to treat just yourselves? How about send the kids to a friends for the evening bringing home some roses (I said roses because its safe but your wifes fav. flowers would be best) spread some petals on the bed, lighting some candles, soft music and surprise her with just you in a nice new robe (of coarse get her a nice new robe too). Maybe order dinner in and have it ready and give her a nice long masage. These are all things that you guys should be doing for eachother (before things lead to sex) often. Make her feel good about herself, make her feel that you find her the sexiest woman in the world. It may help, but even if you try my ideas dont forget about counceling. You dont want to have one great night, you want to have every day with your wife be special so make sure that the two of you get the help you need because 23 years is a long time to just give up on. Good luck.
2007-03-12 04:17:19 · answer #1 · answered by shadowsthathunt 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your wife sounds a bit crazy! Does she not know that when making love with her spouse in the bedroom that this is completely normal for a married couple? Give your head a shake! To me it sounds as though she has fallen out of love, not giving you a passionate kiss. When you marry for love, the passion should be there. Making love is a pleasure not a job! Your wife is way off track with these two issues, kissing and going to the closet so the kids don't hear. She needs some serious counselling on this or you should move on to someone who will love you in a normal way. Cocoa
2007-03-12 04:04:13 · answer #2 · answered by cocoa 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is not normal and you need to address her with your concern!!! Let her know that if the spice don't come back it will ruin the relationship!! Why can't she do it when the kids are in bed and don't they ever leave? I think that it is a big problem but make sure you address it to her quickly because my ex wasn't having sex with me but once a month and we ain't married anymore!!!
2007-03-12 03:53:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Fellow, She has BIG problems. Unless she seeks mental help for her problem, you only have 2 choices. Continue to live as you are and be miserable, or leave. I have never heard of anyone only being able to have SEX in a Closet.
2007-03-12 03:53:54 · answer #4 · answered by donna_honeycutt47 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Wow that a new one to me have you tried counseling because I can understand that she doesn't want the kid to hear but the closet? kind of not normal for every day kind of sex..
2007-03-12 03:52:31 · answer #5 · answered by not2smarttoday 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like she has a problem which could mean many things. She probably isn't sexually attracted to you any longer or is having an affair. You probably need to find out what the problem is so you can plan what to do about it.
2007-03-12 04:01:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like things are stale in the bed department. Kick it up a notch and make things exciting for her.
2007-03-12 03:54:55 · answer #7 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like your wife is just staying with you for the kids sake. she is getting her sex some where else and you should to. do you brush your teeth
2007-03-12 03:59:49 · answer #8 · answered by bluemist 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need couples therapy, seriously.
2007-03-12 03:52:13 · answer #9 · answered by Fire_God_69 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sound like the old flame just ain't there nemore
2007-03-12 03:59:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋