I am being told that I do not stand up for myself. How do I learn when and where I need to stand up for myself.
What purpose does it serve to argue with the person in question.
What purpose does it serve to worry what that persons opinion is?
2007-03-12 03:48:12 · 9 answers · asked by Oilfieldtrashwtx 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Pointing out how wrong another persons opinion is seems another way to create hate and discontent. When they only reason they are voicing their opinion in to boost their own self morale. Me arguing with them about what they said does not change a thing.
Just because You can beat me up in a fight still does not change my opinion of you, it just means you can fight better. Why should my opinion change because you can beat me up.
Why are so many people worried about getting pushed around. When the only way you can get pushed is you allow it to happen.
Call me names does not change the opinion of myself it only shows the insecurities in your self. If I see and understand all of the above and chose not to react to the bullying how is it not standing up for myself matter. I have chosen not to react to that persons insecurities.
I am secure in myself. Others have pointed out that I do not stand up for myself, as if it is wrong. Arguing with you will solve nothing and further prove you right
2007-03-12 04:23:24 · update #1
Those are exactly the right questions. Why argue? Well, if you don't have a compelling reason to put forth your own opinions, then it's perfectly OK to choose not to do so.
Why worry about other people's opinions? Right again. If you are comfortable and confident in what YOU think, then once again, it's perfectly OK to choose not to try to prove the other person wrong.
On the other hand, some day it WILL matter. For example, you may want to defend your opinion about someone you care about or something you care about, such as global warming. If so, then...
- Rehearse your argument, your reasons and evidence for having your point of view
- Take courage...even though you may fear rejection or ridicule, be true to yourself and assert your opinion anyway
- Present your argument calmly and logically, leave emotion out of it
- Don't expect them to agree
- Respect their right to an opinion..."I can understand why you would think that way, but..."
Choose your battles, then have the courage of your convictions.
2007-03-12 04:02:18 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
There is never a purpose to argue. However, there is a purpose for you standing up for yourself. Everyone has an opinion and a belief. There is no need to argue if someone doesn't see things the same way and if compromise isn't possible. Simply stand firm on your beliefs and don't allow anyone to change you. Thank you and may GOD bless.
2007-03-12 11:09:10 · answer #2 · answered by cookie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK. giving your option and arguing can sometimes be a fine line. But it can be done. If you dont stand up for yourself then you will let people walk over you, which can result in low self esteem. If there is something you want or want to say, then get your voice heard. It boosts confidence and gets things accomplished!
If you dont care what other peoples opinions are, at least even a little bit, then you arent being a fair communicator. And if you are a selfish communicator, then who will enjoy talking to you?
2007-03-12 11:02:42 · answer #3 · answered by BdeLassus 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You have to stand up for yourself, cuz nobody else should have to. The key is to know when. If you think someone is making fun of you on a bus or something and you feel it is making you mad, say excuse me, you got something to say..let them say it and dont take it personal, usually that person comes off like an ***, I will usually say that if there are witnesses. It doesnt make me look bad, it makes them look bad, even if you dont say anything back, they still end up looking like an idiot, and you end up looking strong even though you would feel like crap inside. Shrug it off. I dont say anything if someone buds in line or anything, its not worth it. When somebody makes me feel less than I am, I try to think of what someone in New York would say, they dont take crap from ANYBODY!! so why should you? If you start standing up to strangers, it will spill into your life and make you stronger, a little goes a long way. Most people out there that say or do things to other people probably get away with it a lot. Dont let them think that you are any weaker. The more you say no, im not taking any of your crap and let them know, the more you will have respect for yourself and you'll notice that the people around you will notice and give you more respect. This will also make that other rude person think before they say stuff..the reason they do it is cuz nobody says anything back and they get away with it. The more people say **** off to these people, the more self conscience they will get in time. People need more balls. I used to be a doormat, not anymore..even with my son around, I find something clever to say. Makes me smile afterwards and it shows to my son that I demand respect. Try it once, that's all I will recommend, see how you feel about it. Keeping quiet is always an option, but if they feel the need to say something to you..then say something right back...we are all equals.
2007-03-12 11:07:12 · answer #4 · answered by kiss_me_cold_007 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You need to learn to stand up for yourself when you think what others are saying is insulting you or hurting you in any way. Not to do so would only lead you into a trap where others use you up and leave you behind while they walk ahead. Think to yourself - trust your instinct - if you think what the other person is saying is hurting you or affecting you in any way, stand up to them - contradict them in whatever they are saying with whatever you feel is right. Don't lose self-confidence - if you do, you'll lose self-respect and the respect others have for you.
Unless you think that the person in question is wrong, it serves no point in arguing with them. You can argue with them to correct them with what you think is right.
Similarly, it serves no purpose to worry about what another person's opinion. If you are, then bring it out and ask them - you aren't going to find out anything if you keep all the questions mulled up inside you.
2007-03-12 10:55:02 · answer #5 · answered by The One Time Homie... 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Just if someone is messing with you, you have a right to say whatever you want to say it is really as simple as that. Don't worry what they will do or think, you will look better standing up for yourself then if you don't and you will feel better afterwards. Don't let them go away feeling good about whatever because your just gonna be the one hurting in the long run. Get mad!!! haha
2007-03-12 10:56:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Sounds like passion deficit disorder. You don't have to be argumentative to have enough passion to explain your stand on an issue. Know when to draw the line between stating your position and starting an argument
2007-03-12 12:02:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
people who worry about other's opinions are seeking acceptance. It is important that you learn to see yourself in a better light and like yourself better in order to be able to stand up for yourself and your beliefs without worrying about what others think. There are many ways you can improve your self-esteem and one of them is through saying and repeating positive things about yourself.
2007-03-12 10:58:57 · answer #8 · answered by Ruth Less RN 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Their is a huge difference between standing up for yourself and arguing. you stand oup for yourself when you know you are correct and based on facts not ego
2007-03-12 11:53:02 · answer #9 · answered by ldsironman 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋