Can anybody win my special Best Answer award for the best spoonerism? If you MUST swear, then submit the original phrase instead. After all, no-one wants to get deleted.
Don't know what a spoonerism is?
It's a form of joke where somebody might swap the first letters of two words in a sentence. Some people are unfortunate enough to do this accidentally, so let's try to be a little discreet.
An example: (try to find the funny side)
She was so depressed she decided to take a warm bath. As she sat in the soothing water, her soul was suddenly filled with hope.
Clue needed? Soul and Hope.
Get it now?
Right let's get this wompetition under cay.
2007-03-12 03:41:38 · 11 answers · asked by ? 5 in Education & Reference ➔ Words & Wordplay
This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.
Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling
shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered.
The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge,
and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible
huckers; they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets
to go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.
Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared.
Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned
a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy
ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks
The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight
otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity.
At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when
suddenly the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said
Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass
glipper.
The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and
the sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and
let off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame
that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown
cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without
success and their feet stucking funk.
Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a
knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and
a hig bard on.
He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking
ferfectly.
Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince
lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen
swanny.
RIP - Ronnie Barker.
2007-03-12 03:59:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A spoonerism is named after Professor Spooner of Victorian Oxford University. He once called a toast at dinner to Queen Victoria and said, "let's drink to the queer old dean." What he meant to say was "let's drink to the dear old queen."
2007-03-12 03:51:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two of Hearts 2⥠Who of tarts?
Four of Hearts 4⥠Whore of farts
Eight of Hearts 8⥠Hate of Arts
Ten of Hearts 10⥠Hen of tarts
Ace of Spades Aâ Space of aids
Four of Spades 4â Spore of fades
Eight of Spades 8â Spate of AIDS
Four of Diamonds 4⦠Door of fireman's
Five of Diamonds 5⦠Dive of fireman's
Six of Diamonds 6⦠Dicks of Simon's
Two of Clubs 2⣠Clue of tubs
Five of Clubs 5⣠Clive of Fubbs
2007-03-12 03:48:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember a serious newsreader on the BBC many years ago referring to the Turks and the Kurds. He got it right a couple of times and then unfortunately spoonerised it. Whoops!
2007-03-12 03:54:18 · answer #4 · answered by Rozzy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Headmaster to student at boarding school:
You have deliberately tasted two worms and can leave by the town drain!
A double bill to start!
2007-03-12 03:49:05 · answer #5 · answered by Duffer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about this poem...
Im not the phesant plucker
Im the phesant plucker's mate.
Im only plucking phesants because
The phesant pluckers late.
2007-03-12 03:49:08 · answer #6 · answered by The Infamous Arsebiscuit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
teasted toecake - toasted teacake. i actually tried to order one in a cafe. i got in a right mucking fuddle
2007-03-12 03:50:30 · answer #7 · answered by val f1 nutter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My favourite mode of transport
"A well boiled icicle"
"A well oiled bicycle"
2007-03-12 05:22:54 · answer #8 · answered by myattclaire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my girlfriend once asked me to cut the shurtains
2007-03-12 07:45:24 · answer #9 · answered by pinleyboy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
'Food and cooking'..becomes rude
Cunning stunts.
A pant in the country.
2007-03-12 11:09:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋