In august me and my ex-boyfriend of two years decided to end our relationship. I loved him and it seemed as though he loved me. Since then we haven't been friends but we haven't been enemys either. The other night he called at 1am and asked could he come over, I said no politely because I wasn't in the mood for him. My best friend in the whole world called me today and told me my ex was at her job trying to sleep with her. He told her that he has always liked her and blah blah blah. I am really hurt by this. Even though I don't want him he knows she is my bestfriend and he intentionally went to find her. He told her to keep it a sercet but he knew she would tell me. Did he do this to hurt me? Or does he really have feelings towards her. I feel really low right now
2007-03-12 02:16:53 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well he figured since you were not dumb enough to sleep with him, he thought that your friend might have been an easy target next. i don't think he wants her as much as he just wants to get laid
2007-03-12 02:21:14 · answer #1 · answered by kelly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You stated that you don't want him, but yet you are hurt by this. Something tells me that maybe you do have feelings for him still. Maybe you don't know you have feelings, but this shows you do.
If any kind of a guy first calls you, then goes out and trying to get with your friend (to her job that is), is just after a good time. He may have felt "tied down" during the two years, and now that he is single, he is unwinding. Yet, this is immature. If he had true feelings for you during the two years, he should realize that such an action would hurt you. You also asked if he did this to hurt you trying to get you jealous. If that is his intention, that is a form of control. He may want you to crawl back to him. If that is the case, DON'T! You will only get hurt more later on. I know two years is a long time, but if you are asking youself all these questions and it's bothering you, it is best for you to move on and set your standard somewhere else. Think about it, why would you want to worry about someone like that if he doesn't have any concern for you? It stresses you out and then you can't enjoy other things in life.
My advice is try to forget him. If he calls, ignore it. If you really put your mind to it now and forget about him, it will definately save you a lot of worry and stress. There are many different guys out there that will respect you and your feelings.
2007-03-12 02:30:37 · answer #2 · answered by Alicia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For whateva reason he is trying to hurt you even more. Because if he really did still love you then he wouldnt try to sleep with your best friend. Maybe he is trying to do this to get back at you in some weird way (guys are known to do these types of things) and he knows that would hurt your feelings. So trust me it would be better for you in the end to leave him behind and find a better guy out there. There are some many fish in the sea girlfriend. You are a woman never forget that, there will always be a man out there that will do good for you with no problem you just have to find him.
2007-03-12 02:23:44 · answer #3 · answered by tasteycaribbean 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he's probably feeling really lonely these days without you. When he wanted to see you the other night and you said no, it hurt him. He still has feelings for you. Seeing your friend was some type of immature kind of revenge to hurt you for hurting him the other night when you wouldn't see him. Telling her that he always liked her and knowing that she would tell you, he knew it would hurt you because that meant that while you guys were going out, his love for you was all a lie. I think the reason that he chose her to "hit on" was because he new she would give you the message. People only go through all this trouble to get back at someone when they feel very passionate about something.
2007-03-12 02:31:46 · answer #4 · answered by Jennifer S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry for you, but you two broke up.
It's over. Finished. He's your EX-boyfriend.
What that means is that he's in the dating game again and he is NOT restricted to partners that you approve of.
All women are again open to him, and if you are hurt by that: Though luck. Deal with it. You can not tell him to do what you want because it might hurt your feelings.
It is most unlikely he's doing this to hurt you.
Guys are not that deep.
He just wants to get laid.
I am not indifferent to your feelings.
But just the fact you're suggesting he is sacrificing himself (i.e. having sex against his will) to hurt you, gives the wrong idea entirely.
His life no longer revolves around you.
And it is not right that he should run his life according to your feelings.
2007-03-12 03:48:52 · answer #5 · answered by mgerben 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a guy's point of view: Don't ever feel low over a jerk. Don't go near the creep again. Sounds like he is still immature. It's obvious that he knows this other girl is your best friend and using her to make you upset. The question you need to ask yourself is - "Is he doing it?"
As the saying goes: "Wash the dude right outta your hair!"
There's plenty of nice guys out there that don't play "head games."
Unless you want him back!
2007-03-12 02:31:02 · answer #6 · answered by Jay9ball 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he did this to hurt you and get back at you since u w ouldn.t come over when he called. I say F- him and do not have any contact with him. I know its easier said than done but it's going to protect your feelings in the long run
2007-03-12 02:21:32 · answer #7 · answered by pj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is your ex for a reason. You have no business being hurt or bothered by what his activity or romantic interests are today. It is up to your friend to honor your friendship with her by turning him down. He is no obligation to you to curtail his behavior at this point. Get over it and move on and if your friend sleeps with him then she wasn't that great of a friend!
2007-03-12 02:38:35 · answer #8 · answered by conservamommy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even worse, don't give him the power of making you feel bad.
Feel sorry for the guy. Pity how low he had to go to get back at you: Seducing the best friend?
It's cliche and you obviously deserve better esp. since your friend:
a) Told you
b) Didn't do anything
2007-03-12 02:42:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably a little of both, however he is also disrespectful in trying to proposition your best friend. Since you are no longer with him it should be easy to ignore him and move on with your life.
I hope your friend handled the situation.
2007-03-12 02:23:51 · answer #10 · answered by ann t 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a man i feel that no matter his reasoning he is a jerk..even if he did to it to make you want him, would you really want a man who, after two years would so easily try to come between you and a friend? no matter what hun he is an *** ad you should drop him...cut off contact...theres a million guys out there and im sure theres one thatll treat you better
2007-03-12 02:22:21 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋