I have an opportunity to leave my job for another job. I love what I do now, but my boss is absolutely horrible to me and horrible to work for. I also do not even make enough to support myself. I have been telling myself that I have to "pay my dues", but I am so sick of not being able to support myself (I am 26). A very upscale restauraunt has offered me a job. I know I can easily make double what I make now. He said if I throw away the past 2 years of him paying the bills and whatnot (by the way, I do pay some bills and buy all the food and household things) and go back to working in a restaurant, we are done. I am going to be taking my time looking for another job in my field (legal) while I am making ALOT of money and getting myself to a better place financially, which will in turn help him out. I will not let someone run my life, but at the same time I feel like he must feel pretty strongly about this because of his reaction. What shoudl I say or do?
2007-03-12 02:15:22 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
P.S. - He hasn't had a "real" job since 2001, although he does make alot of money.
2007-03-12 02:17:14 · update #1
He isn't a drug dealer, for those who may be wondering, he just doesn't have an "on the books job".
2007-03-12 02:31:34 · update #2
Stand strong, at follow your heart. You don't need to work for an azzhole. Been there, done that, not worth it. As long as you are paying your fair share of bills, and as long as you are earning your money in a honest fashion, NO ONE has a right to tell you where you should work.
Life is TOO DAMN SHORT! BE HAPPY!
2007-03-12 03:01:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
First question, are you married? If not, leave, you're better off with out him. If you are, ask him why he is so adamant that you NOT take this job. If it will help you mentally and financially, there is no reason NOT to take the job. I know what it is like to work for some one that makes your life miserable. I've done the same job for a long time and have worked for a major a**hole and have worked for one of the best people out there. I would rather work for the better person and make less money than make more money and be miserable. You have the option to have both.
2007-03-12 02:23:02 · answer #2 · answered by ladybugg0224 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave the SOB and do what you want to do, it's your life. He doesn't sound like anyone I would want to be with for the rest of my life.
Only one little thing though....it might look at tad sketchy on your resume that you left the legal field to work in a restaurant. Could you work part-time both jobs just to keep your foot in the door?
2007-03-12 02:23:58 · answer #3 · answered by Lucy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no ultimatum here-- its called CONTROL. So take a long hard look at what your future life could be like with someone dictating your career moves. It will not stop here it will continue into every aspect of your life. Perhaps you should take a look at some of the things you have ignored in the past- bet its control. Not good.
2007-03-12 02:57:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you do what will make you happy. If you arent making enough to survive then do something that will help you out. Try to explain to him that the money at the new job is awesome and that it will help you both out so much. I know money is not everything, but that feeling of satisfaction when you know you are okay, better than any feeling I know. Just try talking and explain to him what your plans are. Best of luck
2007-03-12 02:24:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell that controlling boyfriend of yours that it is your life and if you want to go back in the restaurant field and make double the money while you are looking for something in your field then tell him that is what you want to do and you will do it.
2007-03-12 03:14:19 · answer #6 · answered by butterflybaby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any untilatum in a relationship is a question of power. If you give in you are giving him the power. If he were your husband, I'd think twice, but he's not and you have no obligation to give him all the power. Try talking to him if he wont listen at all...start thinking about a new job and relationship
2007-03-12 02:20:27 · answer #7 · answered by ste.phunny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a person gives your an ultimatum like this one he's being very selfish.
He should realize you need to do what's best for you and when people truly love you they want the same for you.
You have to decide if he truly loves you.
2007-03-12 02:24:24 · answer #8 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your drug-dealer boyfriend to let you work at the Red Lobster.
Your story is full of contradictions.
2007-03-12 02:21:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i can't understand -if he makes a lot of money why do u need to work? he doesn't want u to work in a restaurant - let him pay your bills. what's wrong with that?
2007-03-12 02:22:10 · answer #10 · answered by jacky 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋