hubby hidden mags?

Question

hi i was putting stuff in the boot of my hubbys car over the weekend and found some men only mags, im totally lost on why he has them i dont want to ask him as i may not like his reply, weve been married for 4 years , things in the bedroom dept arent great i always have to make the first move and it only works well if i dress up for him then i feel a right idiot, any advice would be great please

Answer 1

I have this problem with my hubby but I have had it out with him. He is always looking on the internet etc.. I dont really have aproblem with it. Its just the way men are made up. He says that he finds me attractive and that he doesnt think of other women when we are together etc. I think its only natural for them to look at other women because men are ruled by their penises (fact and dont any man try and deny it!)...
We will never change them and the reason he is hiding it is because he thinks you will be upset by it.
I've asked my hubby to stop hiding things like this from me and he knows i dont have a problem with it. I have told him that I dont find it seedy or anything but the fact that he hides it makes it seedy.
Try and tell him that you are ok with it as long as he doesnt hide it from you...
There may also be another explanation for it...
He could be storing them for a friend, or has been given them by someone else who was chucking them out.

Answer 2

Hello,
Oh, don't worry about finding mags or whatever in youir husbands car, I am sure they will do neither him, you nor your Marriage, too much harm at all, it's very probably better all the stuff is on paper, than having a husband that may stray out of the marriage.
He is not unique in his choice of literal entertainment, millions of men read trhe stuff on display within the magazines covers, and I know of not one man that would read the contents of a ladies publication, if you should tell him that you don't mind him reading such stuff, then it may well clear the way for things in your bed-room to cheer up a whole lot more, and deminish his want to read about what other people do in the privacy of their lives, after all we are all in the 21st century now, and the world of adult literature and movies has definitely moved on accordingly. Don't go breaking up over this issue, but love him more for his eagerness to learn more about sex and all that goes with it. I do hope I have helped and that you both get along great for this information..Good Luck,.........Tony M

Answer 3

Everyone has a different idea on what sex is and what gets them going---sometimes the couples are a mismatch--and you also have a communicationproblem--why won't you ask about the magazines--they are his and you found them--just ask why---It's not acceptable to some people and maybe not to you--so ask what is going on. The bedroom issues have never been discussed--that is bad--should say something about that too---sex is not supposed to be uncomfortable--physically or mentally. He is acting out and looking for arousal--all people are looking for that---just should be what two people enjoy--you aren't supposed to be a slave to all this stuff just because he says so. You have to get communication going before all is lost--you have got to see this or you will fail---it happens a lot---needlessly. The truth might hurt--but you need truth in a relationship--you have nothing now !! Good luck

Answer 4

Some straight talking here for you to do.
Absolutely nothing wrong in having mags woman like them too. Ask him if he likes that sort of thing and would he
like you to look at them with him.
It sounds like you are both trying to spice things up a bit.
You by dressing up and he by looking at mags.
But you really need to communicate and let each other
know what makes you both feel comfortable. Set some
ground rules. And make it fun. You say you feel like
and idiot - does he know this. Because it is no good
dressing up if it is not done with confidence.
You may not like his reply - but at least you will both
know where you stand. Sex Therapy would probably
be the next option. Although I think you could sort this
out yourself as long as you TALK.

Answer 5

Sounds like your hubby has a fantasy fetish and this is okay as long as you are both into it. Have you both talked about what you like in the bedroom a bit of adventure never hurt anyone you know, it does get a bit boring after a while if you fall into a routine with sex.

Why don't you both find out what your fantasises are and act them out, it would mean that he was dressing up for you and not just you for him you know!!!

Really the mags are probably just harmless and if you both look at them together you never know what might happen.

Answer 6

Tough one. It's not all that unusual for a guy to have those, that is unless it is something off the wall. But at any rate you have two choices here the way I see it; you can A) say nothing and just realize that men are visual creatures or B) confront him about it and get it straight from the horse's mouth. It probably doesn't pose a threat to you, as most guys don't actual look at those things like its a catalog of stuff they can get. We were fascinated by naked ladies as kids and we will be till de die most likely.

Answer 7

All men do it - if they are really honest about it (even if they don't get the mags, they all have hidden fantasies)! Some men also have what they call a "Madonna-Whore" complex, where once they marry, they can't have adventurous sex with their wives, because they think that wives (their children's mother) should be like a Madonna (mother), and have issues with being kinky with them as a result!

Hence, it helps them when their wives dress up as something else. Also it's something out of the ordinary, as once you're married, it's easy to fall into boring routine.

If you don't want to talk about it, then maybe you should just throw your inhibitions to the wind, and get spicy! Try the attached website for some tips, and don't feel like an idiot - you are in control of your sex-life, and if you love your hubby, then go for it!

Answer 8

By nature, men tend to be more visual in their stimulation, while women tend to be more tactile (touch) oriented. The fact that he has men only magazines is not in and of itself a sign of any problem. Now if he says that making love with you is exactly like looking at these pictures, that may be a sign of problems, but if you have a good relationship, and you feel there is love and respect, this is nothing to make you fear your place in his life. It's okay.

Answer 9

firstly not all men have porn mags, I dont and never have.
i would suggest that the first thing you do is talk to him. without communication you have nothing.
secondly there is a difference between love and sex, likewise a difference between reality and fantasy.
he may just like looking at other good looking naked women, doesnt mean he will cheat or has no interest in you. also it doesnt make him a creepy pervert, lets face it we all find different people attractive or sexy..

Answer 10

most men look at porn, lots of women do too, i personally wouldnt be bothered by the magazines themselves, but by the fact that he had hidden them shows that there are some trust issues. speak to him, tell him that you understand the need for visual stimulation, but you hate the fact that he felt the need to hide them from you, try to open up a bit more, they are only pictures, nothing more, they are no threat and the fact that you have been happily married for 4 years should prove that to you