What happens to people like me?

Question

I'm an 18.5 year old high school graduate although I feel like I cheated my way through high school because I was put into special education classes for various reasons. Now I have a part-time job with good pay but I'm afraid to go to college because I feel as if I'm not educated enough. I also have a severe social anxiety disorder which conflicts with my daily life so it's really difficult for me to even hold my job right now. I'm not looking for any sort of pity, but I feel like I totally screwed up my whole life. I just got my driver's license a month ago and I'm still reluctant to drive because I feel like I'll make a dumb mistake and get myself or somebody else killed yet being driven around by your younger sister doesn't give you good self-esteem. It's not how I wanted to live my life at this age. I don't know how I can fix this. Maybe I'm not smart enough to know. To top it off, I'm very unattractive and I'm gay. Am I lost cause? Should I just give up?

Answer 1

Life is what you make of it, I now that is an old saying but I think it has meaning to it.

It really pains me to hear how you feel because right now I feel abit like you do. I dont know how to get out of it either. Lacking confidence is very hard thing to deal with, I used to be so confident and over the last few years i seem to have lost it. But I do truly believe that we can all change this feeling, it just takes hard work. You can contact me if you want to talk about it more

Answer 2

Learning disabilities or social anxiety disorder is something your local community college deals with. They have various resources to help you. Most have an assessment test to help you determine what classes to start with. No one is 'not accepted' to a community college.(they even on-line classes that might be a great option for you)
Not driving right now has some great benefits you may be overlooking. For one it is a great contribution for a healthier earth, two it puts a lot more money in your pocket, walking improves your physical and mental health, and less stress for you since you don't have to deal with traffic ( esp. rude drivers)
Holding a job is an outstanding achievement. Many people take it for granted. Many college graduates are unemployed.
Your still in your teens...I am sure you have heard that you have your whole life ahead of you. right? well you heard right...you do. And you can take it slow. Reaching for what you want in your life doesn't have to come fast. Look for things to enjoy along the way.
You follow the beat of YOUR own drum and take steps toward what you really want. (Do you know what it is you really want?)
Your uniqueness is a gift . Only give up on one thing... thinking your a lost cause.
So in answer to your question- people like you find their way in the world, often awkwardly, like the rest of us.
:)

Answer 3

You are young. 18.5 is fairly young. It sounds to me like most of your problems are self esteem related. Social anxiety disorder is treatable. I personally don't like medications, definitely not as a long term solution but they can help you get over a hump as you learn new habits and ways of thinking. I was very very shy when I was young and the only way I got over it was by facing my fears, over and over again until I started to feel comfortable. The last thing you need to do is give up or try to hide from the world. Nothing can change that way, and things can only get worse that way.

You have to start socializing. I'm not talking about going to parties or anything like that but just little things here and there. Make a friend or two at work, or just try having some conversations with someone here and there. The more you do it, the easier it gets. Same thing with driving, and I was afraid to drive at first too. Just get out and go to the store, or go to places that are close. The more you drive, the better you get and the more comfortable you will get with it. But you have to do it, or your fear will just get bigger.

And as for school, you don't have to go to a full time four year university. You can start at a local and take one class. Most 101 classes are pretty much starting from scratch, you don't have to know much to take them. They have math refresher courses and english courses, you can get a tutor and you can learn or be taught good study habits. All it really takes is doing it and sticking with it. And the only way to get over these kinds of fears is to face them. You can get the courage to face them by realizing that you have your whole life ahead of you, and you don't want to spend it hiding from the world. Self esteem is an internal issue and low self esteem comes from the way you think about yourself. You can change that. You may need help to get started if it's that bad, but if that's the case then go get the help you need. But don't give up. I mean what would be the result of giving up, where will you end up? It just sounds horrible to live that way. You could keep trying and have something so much better, which is a much better option in my mind.

Answer 4

if you give up you will be giving into the system that you have allowed to play you for the last few years. people who are put into the special classes at school are givin up on by the rest of the school. im sure you are not stupid because i dont see very many errors in your question. as far as driving goes they would not have given you a license if you were not qualified. and college may not be for you. have you thought about what kind of job you would like to be doing. maybe you should look into trade schools? Dont give up. and being gay doesnt make you a bad person or a lost cause im not sure why you even put that part in. lots of people are unattractive and they learn to live with it or make the parts of them that can be changed through exercise and healthy eating work to there advantage. no one should ever give up. so dont.

Answer 5

Don't give up. Many universities have disability offices that can help. If you have issues being in public there are on-line classes offered by schools.

Answer 6

Sounds to me like you have accomplished a LOT at a young age.

Don't hesitate to get professional help if you feel depressed.