So i recently found out that i remind my in laws of my husbands ex girlfriend. I always had that feeling but i kept it to myself. Well recently shopping my mother in law wants to paint the babys room before the baby comes and i am having a girl and i love the color purple and i suggested purple and my mother in law and my sister in law both said really loud "NO" i was a little hurt and turned to my husband and told him well you go ahead and pick the color than my in laws were telling me how my hubbys ex girlfriend loved the color purple and this and that and what she did and i reminded them that i was joking when i said it and i left it at that. Than a couple days later we went out shopping again and my hubby brought up the subject to his mom infront of me that i dont like to be told what to do when it comes to my kids and he wasnt lying its not that i dont like to be told what to do its more so that its a big fear for me when someone tells me what i "need" to do and he was explaining
2007-03-11 18:46:14 · 6 answers · asked by mommyandbaby 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
In addition she took it as if there was going to be a conflict between me and my sister in law and she left the house so mad well my hubby went down there and yet again explained to her what we meant and than everything was cool until she told him stuff about me that she dont like and that it reminds her of his ex and my hubby told his mom that there is nothing i do that would ever remind him of his ex and that he is tired of me living in her shadow and all this other stuff. Well my problem is that i feel as though if someone does have a problem with me than they need to come and talk to me about it i was planning on having them over and explaining to them that my hubby and i have talked about this and its becoming diffucult for me and i am tired of not being able to say what i want when i want without being compared to his past and i want to work things out the right way. Yes he has gotten over his past and he loves me so much but it seems like they havent and i dont know what to do ?
2007-03-12 05:50:37 · update #1
Is the house yours? Yes? Then tell them to pee up a rope, you'll decorate it the way you want to, not them. If you don't do it now, it will only get worse.
2007-03-11 18:56:03 · answer #1 · answered by johN p. aka-Hey you. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand up to them. You needn't be rude about it, but you do what you want. Don't even bother debating it.
If they continue to pick on you your husband had better tell them to knock it off.
If he does, and they don't stop, cut off all contact. Seriously. Just like a hang nail. Cut it off.
If they apologize, give them a second chance.
You do not need to be around people who are not nice to you. Period. You control your own life.
As for "being like an ex": Of course you are. All of our previous girlfriends had a lot in common, and what ever those traits are, we find them in most of our significant others.
For example, if we like blonds, you think you're the first? Or if we like pizza, why think a lot of our girlfriends didn't? Or football? The list goes on. We all have things we like and dislike, and, undoubtedly, you contain a lot of those same good things that your husband prefers as all the rest of his significant others. You've also got a lot more of the good stuff he likes, or else he would have stuck it out with one of the others!!
2007-03-12 02:08:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are about five main colors to choose from, what are the chances (she says sarcastically)? You are your own person and obviously your husband chose you over this ex, so the fact that the inlaws even bring it up is just plain rude. The only thing you can do is keep being yourself, even if you do get the dreaded comparison or two. Backing down just means you're subconciously competing with this ex, and you shouldn't have to, so don't.
2007-03-12 01:56:25 · answer #3 · answered by mina_lumina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can choose the right color of the room for your baby because your in-laws cannot intervene in the affairs of your home. You and your husband has to decide for what it is to be done for the best interests of your baby.
2007-03-12 01:52:49 · answer #4 · answered by FRAGINAL, JTM 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's fine..if you really love your husband..don't bother with your in-laws too much..con't be tooo sensitive..your husband knows you well and you don't have nothing to fear..he knows what you want..and tht's a good thing..
your inlaws will get over it..
2007-03-12 01:54:16 · answer #5 · answered by mAhJaL25 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them to stop comparing you to someone else. It's very uncool to compare other people.
2007-03-12 02:42:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋