I am married with two kids and I need to ask everyone a few questions I need to know should I leave him or stay with him he says he doesnt love me anymore and just recently after four years Last September when he started college he started talking to all these girls I questioned one she said nothing was going on and i just found and old text message he wrote her saying he loved her???help
2007-03-11 17:55:15 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A married in college!! He is enjoying himself so you are becoming a baggage to him. And he ain't gonna give up girls' attention just because you don't like it. As he progresses in college, he will believe you are no match to his "intelligence". So frankly, your prospect ain't very good.
About the only thing you can seek some revenge is to divorce him and get him to work to pay for child support. Only financial trouble can shock him. He'll of course blame you, but do you really care?
2007-03-11 18:04:06 · answer #1 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He wants out.
The only thing you really can do, if he's sure about wanting out, is to protect yourself legally and financially and move yourself into a position where you are entirely self reliant.
If, at that point, he wants to talk about continuing the marriage, then go into counseling but only after he's out and you're no longer dependent on him.
If he doesn't want to talk, then it'll be time to move on.
Personally, I'm a practically married man in college just like him, but my fiance is where my heart is and so I don't have his problem. I can see where it can cause problems though, especially if he's anywhere near attractive. The opportunity is there and the social life does have its appeal. That he actually was honest about it to you was surprising and does lend itself to the possibility that, later on, he might come at least partially to his senses. Still, I wouldn't bet very much on the possibility things will turn out nicely for you.
2007-03-12 01:21:58 · answer #2 · answered by Deathbunny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been a child of parents that were in your situation and stayed together I have some advice...
Leave.
Both of you are role models to your children and if you believe it or not they know what is going on, on some level. Eventually they will grow up and realise it fully and wish you had never stayed. They will feel responsible and have to live with that burden. Go have a fulfilling life, don't stay to find out how bad it can get and how resentful you will become.
Be better parents apart. Be strong and brave. That is what your children want, and they will respect you for it. You owe it to yourselves, each other and your children to be happy.
2007-03-12 01:55:02 · answer #3 · answered by Meg D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your children are still young so get out while you can and start a life over,sure it's hard on you and the kids ,but kids adjust easily,for you it may be harder,but you know the truth and you want be happy staying,because you really cant forgive or forget and it want work out.
2007-03-12 01:06:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE! I know it seems like the hardest thing in the world to do, but you will be so happy in the long run. Also, think about the example you are setting for your two kids. You want them to know you are a mother that respects herself and doesn't settle. YOU ARE WORTH IT!
2007-03-12 01:16:19 · answer #5 · answered by Sooocali 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your hubby is up to no good, but you know that. Be strong, and just ask him point blank if this is the man, husband and father he imagined himself being. Put pressure on HIM to figure out where his priorities stand, not on you to get upset or cry or act wounded. If he acts confused, hides stuff, is manipulative, accuses you of being too sensitive...then you have to begin thinking long term. Good luck, this is a tough spot to be in.
2007-03-12 01:02:21 · answer #6 · answered by Paul 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no one can tell you what to do...seeing is you have 2 children with this man. However...do you really think you could stay in a relationship with him, knowing he doesnt love you, and could possibly love someone else, or would like too . I think you should move on, and find real love, and dont waste time wishing that person would love you bak ....been there done that....not worth it.
2007-03-12 01:01:09 · answer #7 · answered by alissa4boo@sbcglobal.net 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Divorce is never easy on kids, so I would make every attempt to save your marriage. Go to counciling. But remember... sometimes you gotta do what ya gotta do, because if you are not happy, there is a good chance your kids will not be happy. good luck
2007-03-12 01:01:27 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you still wanted to stay...you must be patient for this sort of "episode" seems to be normal for couples. that means you have to protect your family/children from losing each other. you have to talk it over with him. he might be confused over girls he's seeing in college that's why he said he doesn't love you anymore.
children are usually the poor casualty of marriage. talk to him and work it out with him...you might want to consider counselling.
i hope things will work out right for you...
2007-03-12 01:25:54 · answer #9 · answered by shekinahjireh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce him honey your only hurting yourself finding out more and more emails. Start finding guys of your own alot of guys like girls with kids b/c these women are like damsels in distress.
2007-03-12 01:04:23 · answer #10 · answered by joejoe 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋