2007-03-11 14:33:17 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If he's in jail for drugs or theft, you should move on with your life. What happiness is there in life with a criminal?
2007-03-11 14:37:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It really depends on a whole lot of things that you didn't tell us.
What kind of crime did he commit? I'd say reconsider your relationship if it was anything violent.
How long will he be locked up? You have to make sure you're willing to change your life for that period of time - visits, phone calls, doing things on your own without him - and are you willing to stay faithful while he's gone?
Is this the first time, or has this happened before?
How serious of a relationship is it? Cause if it's someone new, I'd say move on. If it's someone you've been with a long time, it's all up to you.
Being with someone locked up is not easy, no matter what the situation is. If you have kids together it's even harder.
Best advice I can give is to make sure you have others around you who understand what you're going through, and willing to support you during what's going to be a rough time. Sitting across the table in a crowded visiting room is not the ideal setting for a relationship. But, if you love him, you'll get through it.
If you decide to stick it out, don't let others comments get you down. If he's truly committed to changing, he can do it. Just because he goes away once doesn't mean it will happen again. Best of luck... it's going to be hard.
2007-03-11 21:55:40 · answer #2 · answered by ~StepfordWife~ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
first, answer some questions.
what crime did he commit? was the crime against you or a family member? was he under the influence of alcohol or drugs when he committed the crime? Is he going for violating probation/parole? Was he stealing to support a drug habit?
I'm not saying that if he did these things that you should automatically forget him, if you truly love this man, help him through it by standing by him. If you don't know if you really and truly love him and will be faithful to him, at least let him know.
That way he can concentrate on his rehabilitation and not wonder if you really love him or not.
People can really learn their lesson ya know. God can change the worst person and turn them into a preacher.
So, answer some questions about him and you'll get the help that you need.
2007-03-11 22:15:00 · answer #3 · answered by orange sky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Serously there is no easy way for dealing with it. If you have it set in your mind that your gonna be there for him then just take lots of pictures, write a lot and accept his phone calls. there is only so much you can do. if you got spare money then once in a while send him his comissary. that's it. if he's in there for a long time then go out and meet people because eventually after years pass you will mature and your feelings will change. And try no to pay attention to what these judgemental people had to say in these posts. obviously they have never gone through what you are going through so al they can do is pass judgement. and if that's how it is they should just move to the goody goody post
2007-03-11 22:10:50 · answer #4 · answered by rf1973 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHat is he going there for and how long will he be gone, we have to know this so we can give you some good advice if he is going to be locked up for along time over something serious you really need to find someone else you will be wasting your life on him and get nothing in return like love and companionship..
2007-03-11 21:41:50 · answer #5 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all make mistakes in life. It depends on what he is in jail for. If it is for a vicious crime then I would re-think the relationship but if it is something that he just got caught up in then get counseling and stand by his side.
2007-03-11 21:45:05 · answer #6 · answered by Sunshine 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
it hard when people we love make mistakes in life the best advice i have is make sure to get all the info on how to visit your spouse there are some pretty crazy rules but they are serious about them.then stock up on paper,envelopes and stamps write often but beware of the collect calls you will be receiving they add up quick and its expensive.then just try to stay busy and don't just sit and think about it all the time it will drive you crazy.you might be wondering how i know well my nephew is in prison and its hard on us all but his mom is doing every minute of time he is in her heart so just try to stay strong and if you cant that's ok too relationships are hard when you can see your spouse everyday but when they are locked up its almost imposable good luck
2007-03-11 22:21:48 · answer #7 · answered by patbgone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends. do you love him and want to stick by his side. if you do you can do it i did for 2 years and i am about to marry him. if you not that into him dump him and save both of yall the heart ache and trouble because it is definetly a hard road to go down with a whole lot of tears. i am glad i made the choice i did but it was hard as hell and i couldnt go through it again.
2007-03-11 22:04:37 · answer #8 · answered by peachez 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you can find an easy way to deal with it. You have to ask yourself is the crime he commited worth you doing the time alongside him on the outside?
2007-03-11 22:34:42 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Past performance is an indicator of the future. This is fact. If you don't like your life, change it.
Change the locks, change the phone number, look at the lessons that you have learned, say good bye, and look ahead. Why do you think that you can't do better??? You can, and you should! Just DO IT.
2007-03-11 21:46:12 · answer #10 · answered by Nisey 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋